Hatred Into Love
by FringeDivision2008
Summary: When Clarke is found after months in the woods, Lexa returns to escort her back to her people but the blond is severely pissed off. Every day the former Sky Leader fights against the Commander and her attempts at peace. For every step back to Camp Jaha, Clarke's anger grows stronger. Can she forgive Lexa or will her hatred for the leader consume her destroy her love for the woman?
1. Escaping Capture

Hatred into Love

Spoilers: All Season 1 and Season 2 of the 100; Spoilers from San Diego Comic Con The 100 Panel

Disclaimer: I own nothing!

 **Formerly called Becoming Clarke**

* * *

Clarke wakes to the sound of crackling and attempts to move her hands to her face but senses the binds before feeling them. Opening her eyes she sees the fire and the person beyond it, a burly man with white paint under his eyes with several severe scars across his cheek. Groaning she sat up, aware that her head was pounding and it felt as if she'd drank the entire case of Monty's moonshine in one sitting. The thought brought sickness to her stomach and she soon found herself emptying what little she had eaten onto the floor of the small tent. Thankfully unlike Lexa's tent it was dirt instead of animal hides.

The thought of the woman who betrayed her made her empty her stomach a second time. Anger filled her but also confusion, she expected the grounders to treat her with respect as Lexa had ordered them to. They'd been ordered to listen to her as well but whatever happened at the mountain had likely voided those orders. She was tied up and at the mercy and while she strived to remember how she'd been captured, the last thing she remembered was walking away from Camp Jaha.

"Drink." The burly man held out a cup and Clarke took it with her restrained hands, bringing it to her lips to wash away the acidic taste of the vomit. " _Wanheda_ awakens, you slept for three days."

Clarke gently held the cup, "where am I? Why am I here?" She met his steel blue eyes, "do you even know who I am."

A piece of her wondered what Lexa would do to the warrior sitting before her. Would she congratulate him on capturing Clarke or stick a knife through his body for daring to tie her up. Her wish to strangle the woman was forefront on her mind but she knew that her safety depended on whether the woman still considered her valuable. If the alliance was off, if Lexa had only been playing her emotions to get what she wanted then the likelihood of her safety without a weapon was next to none. That made her more pissed, the idea that Lexa played her emotions to get her people back; for that alone she wanted to strangle the woman and then kill her before bringing her back and doing it all over again.

The man gave her a nod, "I know who you are _Klark kom Skaikru_. You are W _anheda_ , the Commander of Death and my prisoner. You will gain me back my honor as a warrior and allow me the chance to have the woman I love."

"The Commander won't praise you for this, she'll likely shove her sword through you."

The man laughed and leaned forward slightly. "The Commander is otherwise occupied with preserving peace with your pathetic people. She will not know of your capture until my queen has already sent her your head."

Clarke swallowed at the mention of the word queen, " _Azkru Kwin_?"

He nodded, "my beloved was forced to banish me but she will honor me back when I deliver you to her. She will delight at me delivering the Commander's beloved to you and like the first your death will make her listen to my queen."

"The Commander and I are allies, nothing more so this won't gain you anything."

The man stood and picked up a log, dropping it in the fire. "You try to protect your precious commander but all know you spent your nights in her tent. Her ruthlessness was legendary until you started spending your nights between her furs and then she became soft, listening to reason and bending to your will." He bent down beside Clarke and forced her chin up so they looked at each other. "Tell me your secret Clarke of the Sky People, what did you do to make a ruthless woman weak?"

Clarke spit at him and he knocked her across the face, she fell to the ground. "I'll tell you nothing." She tried to pick herself up but her tied hands made it difficult.

She was pissed at Lexa and would show the woman how much if she ever saw her again but between the Ice Nation and the woman who betrayed her, her loyalty would stay with Lexa. She knew what extremes the woman would take, knew her methods and thought processes. Clarke couldn't even begin to predict how the Ice Queen worked but if the woman murdered Costia it was sure bet she'd take out anything that could make her have power over Lexa.

As she turned over, Clarke saw the man sit back down across from her. "Tell me your name, I at least deserve to know my captor's name."

"Roan, now stay silent."

She sat up after several attempts and looked at the fire. "Why can't I remember anything?"

"I said stay silent!"

"Did you poison me?" Clarke looked up to see him staring at her.

He was on his feet and held a knife to her throat seconds later. "Stay silent or I shall remove your tongue. Your tongue is not required to be attached to you when I give you to my queen."

Clarke nodded and he backed off, sitting down across from her. "I'll be quiet, just tell me why I can't remember anything."

"All the food you had with you were poison, known to induce madness. After your mind clears you do not remember anything. Now be quiet."

* * *

Night wore on and Clarke noticed that Roan laid down to sleep with his knife not far off from him. Silently she moved across the dirt and got to her knees, reaching for the knife. Clarke paused when she got her hands on it and waited to see if Roan would wake. When she didn't she maneuvered herself till she sat on her bottom, flipping the knife carefully in her tied hands she began using it to cut the ropes that bound her.

It took a long while but the ropes finally cut and fell into her lap. Brushing them aside, the former sky leader quietly put the knife in her boot and turned onto her hands and knees to crawl to the tent opening. It was only once she was free did she survey the area to find she was still in the forest. Heading away from the camp, she was careful to step only in wet patches of moss and leaves to avoid making noise, it was one of the few survival things she'd learned from watching both Anya and Lexa.

Morning arrived and Clarke found herself on the edge of a village, those moving around in it were noticeably _Trigedakru_ so Clarke knew she was partially safe. Just as she started toward the village, a hand grabbed over her mouth and around her waist. Fighting she found herself thrown to the ground, leaning over her was Roan and he looked angry.

"You think I would not know you escaped? I put that knife there to see if you would attempt such foolishness and I was right."

"Let me go, I'll do anything you want." She groaned as he sat on her, his big frame and muscle no doubt the reason he weighed a ton. Clarke found herself unable to move despite her attempts.

He chuckled and pulled rope from around his waist, tying her wrists. "Others would take their pleasure than let you go but I have no desire for you. Your attempts at seducing me to get what you wish will not work."

Clarke stared at him before turned her head to see several of the village warriors doing patrols near the tree line. " _Sis au beja_!" Clarke yelled and repeated the phrase, biting Roan's hand when he attempted to put his hand over her mouth. " _Sis au beja_!"

As expected the warriors moved from the tree line towards them and when they arrived to see Clarke under the burly warrior they stared at them. Roan exchanged words with them in _Trigedasleng_ and Clarke had learned enough while with Lexa to know that he was telling them his young wife repeatedly tried to run because she didn't like the marriage her parents arranged.

" _Spicha_!" Clarke yelled and looked at the warriors as she fought against Roan's hold. " _Azkru_! _Azkru_!"

Roan slapped her across the face, " _em pleni houmon_."

" _Ai laik Klark kom Skaikru_!"

That had the warriors pointing their weapons at Roan and one threw him off of Clarke, helping her up. She stood and the warrior handed her a sword, motioning to the man that was standing facing them. "He is yours _Wanheda_."

"You can keep your life but next time we meet I will not hesitate to slit your throat." She lowered the sword. "Go before I rethink my decision."

Roan turned and ran into the forest and Clarke felt the adrenaline slowly dissipate in her body. Pain from wounds and bruises filled her and she held out the sword to the warrior beside her. He took it and as she let go, Clarke found herself being dragged under the heavy current of pain.

* * *

Softness cocooned her body as Clarke became aware of herself, she was warm and the bed she laid on wasn't the forest floor. Opening her eyes she found a woman leaning over her, a wet cloth in her hands as she dabbed at Clarke's forehead.

" _Weron ai_?"

The woman smiled, "a village two days from the _Azkru_ border. Do you remember the warriors saving you from the ice warrior?"

"Yes." She looked around to find herself in a tent, no one else was there besides the woman but it was clear it was a family home. Clothes hung from rods to create the semblances of rooms and the small area Clarke lay in was warmed by a pot holding a fire. "What happened?"

The woman put the rag down in a bowl and stood, starting to prepare what looked like a small plate of bread and dried meat. "You were injured, a wound was infected and the brutality of that ice warrior did you no favor in allowing it to heal."

"I remember cutting myself when I ran from him." Clarke sat up slowly and accepted the plate from the woman. " _Mochof_ , what is your name?"

The woman sat on the edge of the bed, "Osa, you speak our language with little accent, who taught you?"

"I know very little _Trigedasleng_ , enough that I can get by if necessary. As for who taught me, it doesn't matter." She refused to think about the language lessons that she exchanged with Lexa as they sat eating their meals by the fire. She was still angry at the woman and had the urge to shove a knife into her back so she knew what it felt like to be stabbed in the back by someone she cared for. "Are you a warrior? I thought warriors only spoke _gonasleng_."

"I was a warrior until I birthed children to my _houmon_ , the last made me weak and I was unable to return to battle. I became a healer as they are necessary when men go to battle and come back with wounds."

Clarke nodded, "once I'm better I'll move on and leave your village in peace."

"Word has already been sent to _Heda_ that you have been recovered, she will no doubt arrive within two days of receiving such word."

" _Heda_ need not know I'm here." Clarke placed the plate aside and looked at her hands. " _Heda_ and I aren't exactly allies despite the alliance between our people. That is, if there still is an alliance."

Osa chuckled, "you may believe that _Klark kom Skaikru_ but I assure you that _Heda_ instructed all the villages that you were to be treated as is she was the one residing in the village. _Heda_ will come and when she does I would be gracious," she stood and smiled down at Clarke. "Even if your anger at her makes you wish her dead."

"How did you know?"

"You have the look of revenge in your eye when she is mentioned."

"Yeah well I deserve to after what she did to me!" Clarke folded her arms and allowed her mind to momentarily flash to the mountain and Lexa's betrayal.

Osa nodded and patted Clarke's arm, "rest Clarke of the Sky People, you are still weak from the infection."

* * *

A/N: Here we go, this one is going to be fun to write I know!

Next: Lexa arrives and Clarke unleashes fury at the woman for her betrayal.

 **Please read and review so I know how I am doing plus it allows me to write towards the direction of the audience's wishes. You guys give me little comments of 'do this please' or 'this should happen' and I slowly work them into the plot I have already developed.**


	2. We Meet Again

Hatred into Love

Spoilers: All Season 1 and Season 2 of the 100; Spoilers from San Diego Comic Con The 100 Panel

Disclaimer: I own nothing!

* * *

The sound of horses and yells of ' _Heda_ ' made Clarke look up from where she was cutting clothes for Osa to use in her healing. Standing the former sky leader went to the doorway of the tent and watched as Lexa brought her horse to a stop, a warrior of the village grabbed the horse's reins as the leader dismounted. Lexa spoke quickly to someone and they immediately motioned to the tent Clarke stood in the doorway of. She watched Lexa turn to the tent and walk towards it, her eyes meeting Clarke's for a short second before the leader moved into the tent's interior and grabbed the sword that had been given to her the day previously.

As Lexa entered the tent Clarke spun around and put the sword to Lexa's throat. "Give me one reason why I shouldn't slit your throat where you stand."

" _Heda_ is there anything I can acquire for…" Osa's words died on her tongue as she entered the tent to find Clarke holding a sword to Lexa's throat. "Clarke…"

"Leave us." Lexa spoke calmly as if there wasn't a blade touching her neck that could take her life at any moment.

Osa took a step forward, "that is unwise _Heda_ , if I leave then she would take your life."

"I said leave us."

The woman left and Clarke stared into green eyes. "You betrayed me."

"I am aware."

"You played on my emotions to get what you wanted."

Lexa swallowed, "that is untrue Clarke. If you wish to spill my blood than do so or lower the sword."

"After what I did at the mountain this would be easy."

The leader moved her hand up and lowered the sword from her throat with just two fingers. "Easy perhaps if your emotions did not cloud your judgment. I taught you already Clarke that we cannot lead if we do not control our emotions. Nor can you take a life, as is obviously evident by the fact you did not strike with intent when I entered. One that wished my life would have taken me unprepared."

Clarke dropped the sword on the ground, "why are you here?"

"To escort you to Polis."

"Well you can go screw yourself." The blond walked around her and out of the tent, she found several warriors and Osa waiting. They were most likely waiting to see if Lexa was alive.

* * *

Lexa followed and the warriors parted ways as she followed after Clarke. The blond grabbed a sword from the rack that was nearby and threw it at Lexa's feet before grabbing another to hold it up.

"Clarke this is unwise, you are challenging me to a fight you cannot win."

"I'm tired of your lessons and your empty words!" Clarke bit out and stared at green eyes with blue full of fire. "I challenge you _Heda_."

Silence seemed to permeate the camp and warriors crowded around. Lexa bent to get the sword and held it up, "do not make me do this Clarke."

"Do what? Run me through with your sword like you keep telling yourself you should have done the first time?" She narrowed her eyes, "that would have been a lot easier wouldn't? If you had let Indra kill me? No need to play the pity card after I stabbed Finn or having to protect me from your ruthless warriors? Quint and Gustus would still be alive and my people would have…"

Clarke's words were stuck in her throat as Lexa lunged, she used the sword's flat edge to knock the blond's feet from under her. Clarke landed on her back, sword feet from her hands and Lexa bent down beside her. "I do not regret what I did at the mountain Clarke and I understand your anger at me but challenging me to a fight is not wise. Now calm your anger and listen to what I have to say." Lexa stood and held out her hand, Clarke reluctantly grabbed it.

"Okay." Clarke put her hands up, "but I just have a few things to say in return."

"Speak and I will listen."

The blond swung her fist and it caught the warrior unsuspectingly. "That was for walking away from Mount Weather." She swung again as Lexa tried to dodge the blow but failed. "That was for betraying me." As Lexa went to grab Clarke's arm to prevent her throwing another punch, she used her right arm instead of her left. "And that is for using my emotions against me!"

" _Em pleni_!" Lexa grabbed both of Clarke's arms and twisted her around. "Doing what you just did in front of my people is punishable by death."

Clarke turned her head slightly to see the brunette out of the corner of her eye. "Kill me."

"I cannot."

"You're being weak _Heda_ , allowing your emotions to guide your actions."

Lexa let Clarke go and stared into blue eyes as the woman turned around. "I cannot kill you because the laws prevent it. You have been called upon by the gods and must be judged, until the moment you are determined to be unworthy I cannot touch you." She stepped away and looked at Osa as she passed. "See to any wounds she has injured again."

" _Sha Heda_."

The brunette walked away and Osa moved to Clarke, the middle-aged woman put her hands on Clarke's arms as she guided the girl back to her tent. "I'm fine Osa."

"I will judge that, you should not have done what you did child."

"Well she needs a good ass-kicking so that stick up her ass is knocked loose. Miss High-and-Mighty needs to come back down to earth and know things aren't all lessons and battles."

* * *

The village held a feast to celebrate Lexa's arrival and Clarke found herself forced into what was a blue dress that Osa produced out of nowhere. She insisted that as a guest it was customary that she wear something nicer than the rest of the village. Walking with Osa and her daughter, Clarke noticed Lexa walking out of the village leader's tent in pants and a shirt that showed off her arms. The woman wore clothes she'd never worn before, Clarke found herself amazed at how beautiful the warrior looked. After that thought she immediately turned her memories back to Mount Weather so she would ignore the thought of Lexa beyond her betrayal.

"I see the dress fit well." Lexa spoke softly as she stood before Clarke. "You look beautiful Clarke, please join me."

Clarke tightened her hands into fists, "I'd prefer to sit with Osa and Nora."

"As you wish." She turned her attention to Osa. "Jok states that you require more herbs for your healing tonics, I shall have someone bring more during the next trade."

"That is kind of you _Heda_." The woman turned to her daughter, the girl was nearly twelve winters old. "My daughter Nora has just become a third to Jok, she just returned from her first patrol with no injuries."

Lexa nodded to the girl, "how many winters are you?"

"Twelve _Heda_."

"If Jok can spare you then you would be welcome in Polis to train among my warriors. Would that be something you would wish or would you prefer to stay in your village?" The girl looked slightly nervous, "there is no shame wishing to stay in one's village with one's family."

The young head looked up to meet green eyes, "I wish to stay with my people _Heda_ , I mean no offense."

"None is taken, you do your family and village proud by staying to learn to protect them." Lexa put her hand on the girl's shoulder. "One day when we meet again you shall be a warrior worthy to defend this village."

" _Mochof_." The girl ducked her head in embarrassment.

Lexa nodded to Osa, "you have raised a honest and beautiful daughter Osa, a fine fledgling warrior as well."

" _Mochof Heda_."

With a curt nod the woman was off to do whatever she wanted. Clarke turned to Osa, "Lexa gave you this dress and demanded I wear it didn't she?"

"Requested you wear the dress." Osa leaned in towards Clarke, "it is customary to supply an article of clothing to the one you intend to court. If they wear it then they are receptive."

"Court?" Clarke shook her head as she hissed through her teeth. "I don't want to court her, I want to be as far from her as humanly possible."

" _Heda_ has not formally courted anyone since the loss of her beloved five winters ago. It is an honor and while you do not wish it, it would be wiser to state so in private instead of publically announcing your displeasure." Osa sighed, "especially after your challenge earlier in the day."

* * *

The sound of drums made Clarke look up halfway through the celebration. Drummers were using different size drums and patting their hands against them as some of the children rang bells in tune with the music. Couples started getting up and dancing to the music, it was more rhythmic than musical and Clarke watched as warriors and women and even children laughed and smiled.

"Would Clarke of the Sky People honor me with a dance?" A warrior held out his hand and she took it, "I am Jok, leader of this village."

Clarke smiled at him, "thank you for taking me in."

They dance and Clarke laughed, happy for the first time in a while. Turning suddenly she met Lexa's eyes and saw the smile on her face as the woman sat across the fire, her green eyes full of happiness as she watched the former sky leader enjoy herself. That made Clarke want to take the happiness and destroy it so she turned around and leaned into Jok.

He met her eyes and her smile, "what can I give you, ask anything and it will be yours."

"A night of pleasure." Clarke whispered, knowing that when Lexa saw her exiting his tent in the morning, the happiness would fade and anger would exist.

A smile crossed the warrior's face and his brown eyes turned nearly black in the light of the fire. "If that is what you wish, how can I deny you?" He held out his hand and she took it, "come with me."

Lexa watched Jok leave with Clarke and narrowed her eyes. "Mila, where does your _houmon_ go?" She looked at the woman that sat beside her, who was pouring berry wine.

"If he is with a women, he is likely taking her to his furs." Mila met Lexa's eyes, "the child within me does not allow me to sate him."

* * *

Without a second thought, Lexa draw her sword from where it sat beside her and moved silently past the celebration so not to alarm them. Upon nearing the man's tent, his guards didn't stop her and she entered to see him leaning over Clarke as she laid on the bed with her head thrown back, thankfully both were still dressed. Lexa put the sword to Jok's back and he paused his actions.

"Remove yourself this moment."

Clarke's eyes flew open and she sat up quickly as Jok removed himself from the bed. He turned to look at Lexa, " _Heda_ , I only did as she asked, I swear upon my life."

"What the hell!" Clarke moved off the bed and looked at Lexa. "What right do you have just barging in here when it's none of your business who I sleep with?"

"Return to your wife Jok." The man left immediately and Lexa lowered her sword as she stared at Clarke. "Your anger at me makes you reckless Clarke. I do not care who you bed or when but if done so to exact revenge on me, I will stop your actions."

* * *

Clarke walked out of the tent and Lexa followed, "stop following me!" She turned suddenly to look at Lexa, "don't you get it? I hate you! I want you dead Lexa, I don't want your gifts or your lessons or anything related to you. If I could forget you I would."

Lexa stared into her eyes before whispering. "I would be dead if you wanted me dead and you may hate me Clarke but that is only your anger speaking. You know why I took my people and left, you understand that decision and would have done the same if the offer had been given to you instead. A leader does what is best for their people even at the expense of their heart."

"You know nothing about me!" It was hissed in anger and Lexa merely stared at her. "I am nothing like you."

"I know." Lexa stated as she turned to go back to the celebration. "I would have slit the throat of one who betrayed me." Without further words she began walking back. "Goodnight Clarke, sleep well."

Clarke balled her fists up, "go float yourself!"

* * *

A/N: Well that could have gone better!

Next: Lexa finds Clarke trying to leave the village but it doesn't go as expected.

Please read and review...


	3. Consequences Learned

Hatred into Love

Spoilers: All Season 1 and Season 2 of the 100; Spoilers from San Diego Comic Con The 100 Panel

Disclaimer: I own nothing!

* * *

Lexa found herself starring at a very amusing sight, she'd been on her way back from bathing in the river to find Clarke trying to steal her horse. Of course no one had mentioned to the blond that the horse had been meticulously trained to not move without a very specific command. So the blond was currently trying to pull the horse by it's reins but the animal wasn't moving. The white mare just looked unamused but remained standing against the former sky leader's pull.

"Stupid animal, it's not like you know who is riding you." Clarke got onto the horse's back and kicked her heels into it's side but it didn't move. "Oh come on, seriously what will make you move?" She got off the horse again and pulled apples from her bag, "here I have some apples." Backing up the blond held out the apple but the horse just bent down and ate grass. "Something has got to make you move?"

"A command." Lexa moved over to the horse and Clarke glared at her. "She is trained to only take command from me."

Clarke shoved the apple back in her bag, "you don't trust anyone so you make it so no one can ride your horse but you."

"I trust you Clarke." The leader patted the horse's neck, " _ron_."

The horse moved to Clarke and sniffed her bag, nudging her nose inside till she withdrew with the apple. "You just told me the horse's command, I could steal it when you aren't looking."

"However you will not." The brunette smiled softly, "you know how hard it is for me to trust and I trust you. Besides Clarke, you chose my horse when there are a dozen more and your bag only holds items necessary for a visit to the river." She walked away towards the temporary tent she resided in. "You planned to return her."

"We'll see about that."

* * *

Later in the day Lexa found Clarke nowhere to be found and visited Osa's tent. The healer was bandaging one of the younger training warriors who had a large cut across her arm. As soon as the woman finished she smiled and turned to Lexa as if she was a welcoming sight.

"Have you seen Clarke today?"

"Not since the morning meal and she stated she would be going to the river to bathe."

"May I check her stores?" Lexa had a feeling Clarke had stolen her horse to attempt to anger her and wanted to make sure she was right before she went after the girl.

A quick check of the small area Clarke occupied showed no residence and all her belongings were gone. Lexa could only roll her eyes as she made her way to the pen that held the horses, she'd have to go after Clarke before the blond harmed herself or worse, put her life in danger. Mounting the horse, the warriors in the village said nothing as she left as they knew better than to question her.

It didn't take long to pick up Clark's trail, she didn't know how to ride a horse in the forest without leaving evidence of the journey behind. Putting the horse into a gallop, she made her way through the woods because the direction Clarke was heading was Ice Nation territory. She had under a day to catch up with Clarke as the walk took two day but on a horse it was a day. If Clarke crossed the territory then there was nothing Lexa could do, part of her treaty with the Ice Nation's queen was to never step foot in the territory or forfeit the alliance.

* * *

Lexa followed the hoof prints to a stream and saw Clarke bent down beside the water drinking. Her horse was tied to a branch but clearly didn't want to be there if the movements it gave off were any indication. She dismounted and made her way to the horse, which didn't startle when she neared her.

" _Chil au_." The horse calmed and leaned down to eat some of the grass surrounding it. "You are growing more reckless Clarke, it must stop before you start a war."

Clarke stood suddenly and turned to see Lexa, "why did you follow me?"

"You stole my horse." Lexa merely looked into blue eyes. "Trust does not grow with the stealing of another's horse."

"I don't care if your trust me, now take your horse and leave me alone because I'm going home."

Lexa grabbed Clarke's arm as she started towards the brown mare that Lexa had ridden. "You do not know these woods Clarke. Feel the temperature of the air, look at the ground and the feel how cool the water is."

"It's a little colder, just means winter is setting in. I'll be fine, you don't have to worry about me. You obviously didn't before and I survived."

"We are three hours from the _Azgeda_ border, if you cross that border I cannot come after you." Lexa bore into the eyes that watched her, "I will have to betray you yet again by abandoning you no matter what their warriors or queen does. Your people will receive your body piece by piece over a period of weeks, then the last to arrive will be in the night with your head on a spear. I do not tell you this to frighten you but to inform you that there is no mercy and nothing can be done without risking war, which I will not allow."

Clarke nodded silently, the memory of Lexa telling her of Costia over Finn's funeral pyre. Her anger at Lexa was one thing but her previous experience with Roan told her that the likelihood of what Lexa said was true. She decided to place her anger aside for a fraction of time to listen to what the brunette had to say because it wasn't about silly things like dresses or challenges but about saving her life.

"Okay, I'll go back to the village."

The leader let go of Clarke's arm and the blond climbed onto the brown mare, turning it towards the village. Lexa mounted her horse and gave a command, moving forward to follow Clarke knowing she'd made the right decision telling the blond about what would happen if she crossed into Ice Nation territory. Clarke looked back at her with a sober look on her face but Lexa was aware that the likelihood of anger returning was as likely as her continued hatred of the _Azkru Kwin._

* * *

Midway through the ride, which was a nice walk, Lexa paused her horse and pulled her sword from behind her back. Clarke narrowed her eyes but stopped the animal she rode on as well, looking around waiting. Three figures moved from behind trees and Clarke recognized one as Roan, he smirked at her.

"We meet again _Wanheda_." He looked over at Lexa, "you crossed into our queen's borders and now you pay."

Lexa steadied her horse as the animal shifted it's hooves. "I stopped at the river, I did not cross into your territory."

"You did, to save your lover from suffering the fate of the first." He made a signal with his hands and Clarke watched as weapons were aimed at them. "Give us the sky girl and we will let you go, no need for war over a simple girl that does not know the land or how to live on it."

Clarke looked over to see Lexa's features blank as normal but her eyes were stormy, her anger present and it astounded the blond. She'd done things to anger Lexa and received nothing except for calm and perhaps humor but demands of sacrificing a girl that she's betrayed before got more anger than Clarke thought possible. Lexa slid from the back of her horse and stared at Roan, holding her sword out towards him.

"You will not touch her, not without making me release my spirit and that will not happen."

Fear climbed through Clarke, fear for Lexa that overrode anger at the exact moment. She couldn't bear to see her harmed despite the wish to harm her herself. It was the exact same meaning of a phrase Wells had taught her as a child about how we could harm our friends but if another attempted, it became war. "Lexa, I need your spirit to stay where it is. Don't do this."

"Yes _Heda_ ," Roan chuckled. "Listen to her and put your sword away."

"I would rather put my blade through you." Lexa pulled a knife from her thigh and threw it at Roan, it hit his throat with precision. Clarke kicked the bow out of the warrior that stood by her, sliding off the horse as he recovered the weapon and as he stood she pulled an arrow from his quiver, jamming it unto his neck. She turned to see Lexa running the third through but once again her shoulder was clearly dislocated. Having seen it not once but twice before, she figured it was a common occurrence for the leader. "Clarke?"

"I'm fine." Clarke moved over to her, adrenaline running through her.

"Good." The leader grabbed her chin and glared into her eyes. "Never try to persuade me during a battle again. You may not be touchable now but that does not mean another will not suffer for your actions. There are laws that must be obeyed if you are to stay in my territory and while war allows constant changes and open decisions, peace must maintain order and that means not questioning me. I have let you get away with more than any other but no longer. The next time you do something reckless, another will suffer." She let Clarke's chin go, "now mount your horse and let us return to the village. Tomorrow we leave for Polis and after that I will return you to your camp."

Clarke tore away from Lexa and turned her mare before turning back around to look at the woman still looking at her. It seemed Lexa was waiting for Clarke to climb onto her horse before she mounted her own. Anger tore into Clarke at how Lexa treated her, demanding things of her like she was one of her warriors. She wasn't a warrior, she was a leader and deserved the respect of one.

Without further thought she swung her fist but unlike before Lexa caught her hand and twisted her arm round till she felt Lexa leaning against her back. Soft hot air ran across her ear and Lexa spoke calmly. "I told you another reckless action will cause another to suffer. Nora will go to Polis and train with my warriors, she will not be allowed to stay in the village like she wished. The next time you are reckless will lead to Osa getting only half the herbs I offered on the next trade." She let Clarke go and waited, watching as the former leader climbed onto the horse without a word. "And Clarke," the girl looked at her soberly, "you will tell Osa that your actions caused her daughter to lose the right to remain behind."

* * *

Clarke found herself back on her bed in Osa's tent, curled up on the fur while she thought about Lexa's statement about another suffering if she did anything reckless. She saw the conviction in Lexa's eyes and knew she would do it, she cursed herself for being stupid enough to try to punch the leader and it resulted on Nora being forced to have to join the other trainees in Polis. She wouldn't make the mistake again, she'd keep her anger to her words and let her actions be polite.

"Clarke?" Osa sat on the edge of the bed and looked at the blond. "Are you unwell?"

"In a manner of speaking." Clarke sat up and looked at the woman that housed her. " _Heda_ made it clear that my actions would result in consequences. She said if I did anything she considered reckless she'd make another suffer because I was untouchable." Tears welled up in Clarke's eyes as she wiped them away. "I made a mistake and now Nora is suffering because of me. My punishment is her having to go to Polis instead of staying behind." Finally blue met brown eyes and Clarke shook her head. "I am so sorry Osa."

Osa nodded, "we must learn from our mistakes and sometimes it is others who pay for such mistakes."

"I'm sorry."

"It is already finished."

A pot broke and they turned to see the twelve year old standing nearby. Clarke met her brown eyes and shook her head. "Nora I'm so sorry."

"You must speak to Heda." The girl fell to her knees by the bed and leaned against it on her elbows. "She will listen to you, if you ask her not send me to Polis she will not."

"I will try but it's not a guarantee she will listen."

* * *

Lexa stood packing her saddle bag for their departure the next day when she heard the guards admit someone to her tent. Turning she found Clarke standing in the doorway quietly, waiting for entrance unlike the multitude of times before that the woman had seen to dismiss manners. Pausing in her efforts, Lexa motioned to the chairs that sat by the brazier that held fire to warm the tent. Clarke sat without a word and waited, clearly something on her mind that burdened her. Lexa sat beside her and noticed the girl held a sober expression, regret filled blue eyes and instantly the leader was aware she wanted to talk about her actions in the woods.

"It was wrong of me to hit you," Clarke looked up at her and sighed. "You were just trying to protect me and I shouldn't have spoken. Can you please reconsider sending Nora to Polis?"

"How would a lesson be learned if not enforced?"

Clarke put out a hand to stop her from speaking again. "Lesson learned, I know you're serious about what you say. I've decided that you're right, I should just keep my anger to my words instead of challenging you or physically assaulting you."

Lexa stood and walked to her saddle bag, removing something from inside. Clarke saw a book covered in some type of binding and a metal container. "Perhaps your anger would be better dispelled in these." She held them out to the blond, "take them Clarke."

Clarke took the objects and she opened the container first to see charcoal. Lifting a piece out the former leader held it in her hand. "Drawing materials?"

"Your anger can be contained within the book, the ability to return to it at any moment if you wish but closed away when necessary." Lexa met blue eyes as Clarke turned her head to look up at her. "Your mother negotiates horribly but she does speak of you often. I remember her once saying you filled the walls of your home full of what you believed the ground to look like."

Putting the charcoal away, Clarke stood and held both the book and metal container in her hand. She stared at Lexa for a few moments before speaking. "There's no change is there? Nora will go to Polis."

"You've seen the error of your ways Clarke so I will forget this once. The next time you act recklessly, it will not be forgiven or forgotten so remember your actions." Lexa moved to finish packing her belongings as Clarke left the tent.

Clarke was found that evening by the central fire of the camp drawing in the book she'd been given. Taking a moment to be quiet, she stood behind Clarke at a distance to see what the girl had drawn. She expected her friends or wild plants, not herself drawn as she sat on her throne holding her dagger the first time she and the sky girl had met. A smile found its way to her face as she thought about that day and how she'd been prepared to kill the blond but her quick wit and attitude had been the first verbal fight she'd been able to have since before her sister married into the Desert Clan. That decision still weighed on her, her sister's hatred for a union she hated would always be a burden she carried but peace had to be maintained.

Side stepping, she sat down a few feet from Clarke. "I see my gift is well used."

"Only because it's stupid to waste forged materials." Clarke looked up at her, "they're hard to come by now."

"Only outside of Polis, which is where those were obtained from. The woman who owns the shop those were bought from has reasonable prices, if a bit high."

Clarke looked at the charcoal in her hand, "so you got these from an art store?"

"Materials in the store are not just for art but also for cloth making, food goods for cooking and several other domestic activities." Lexa smiled softly yet again, "I told you Polis would change how you see us. We are not just warriors who live in the forest, we have a healthy thriving civilization that has all manners of occupation."

"And I'll see it tomorrow?"

"No, Polis is a three day journey." Lexa stared at the fire, "but yes you will see all the city has to offer. You will also go to the temple and undergo a test to see if you were indeed chosen by the gods. My people call you _Wanheda_ but you have not officially received that title yet, if you do there could be war."

"Why, don't like to be challenged?"

Lexa looked up at her, "no, because there has never been two _Heda_ before in any form. Several of the clans stand against me while keeping the treaty valid but they may choose to attack my people in your name."

"I don't want another war." She shook her head and went back to her drawing. "Or the title, you can keep it."

"The gods decide our fate Clarke, we have no choice but to continue through life according to what they wish. As _Heda_ we are chosen by the gods to do great things and if your spirit has been chosen by a previous _Heda,_ you have no choice but to accept and lead your people."

"And if that leads to war?"

The brunette thought about what it meant and knew what ultimate choice she'd make. "We lead together once again and this time no deals shall be made without consultation with one another. Our alliance stands, my people and yours are aware of this but the others are not so they will believe my betrayal at the mountain means an alliance with you is grounds for war."

"Consider the alliance tentative." Clarke stood and moved away from the fire.

"I will not attack your people unless in retaliation." Lexa stated to the retreating figure, unsure of how to accurately stress that she would not sacrifice Clarke again.

* * *

A/N: Well that was both humorous and deep.

Next: The journey to Polis is underway and Lexa finds herself in trouble with her people much to Clarke's shock.

Please read and review...


	4. Breaking Rules and Releasing Anger

Hatred into Love

Spoilers: All Season 1 and Season 2 of the 100; Spoilers from San Diego Comic Con The 100 Panel

Disclaimer: I own nothing!

* * *

The journey to Polis took Clarke on a journey, she rode silently beside Lexa and allowed herself to take in the nature and the small villages they passed. Lexa tried to make small conversation but Clarke gave clipped answers, not prepared to speak in friendly conversations just yet with the grounder leader. Lexa learned by the second day that silence was preferred to conversation. It was made clear they would stop for the second night at Tondc, the village having been rebuilt from the rubble.

Clarke was silent as they entered the village, she saw the warriors and civilians alike starring at her instead of Lexa. It was if she was a traitor of some kind and she saw the wariness in some of their eyes as she passed. Two warriors waited at the middle of the village with Indra, the woman looked as if she was about to have an aneurysm when the warriors stepped forward to take the horses. Lexa and Clarke dismounted the horses and immediately Indra turned to walk into the large tent that Clarke was sure had been prepared once Lexa's return was announced by messenger.

Both walked into the tent and Clarke nodded to the woman. "Indra."

"Sky girl, why are you here?"

Clarke motioned to Lexa, "she's dragging me to Polis to do some ritual test. Trust me when I say I don't want to be here anymore than you want me here." She looked over at the brunette, "I would prefer to be back in that village."

Lexa merely moved past her, "you were targeted by the Ice Nation, that warrior I killed stated as much. You will not return to any outer villages without a four-warrior guard in the future." The grounder leader removed her gloves and sat on her throne. "Speak Indra, what matters have you wishing for my return so quickly?"

Trigedasleng was quickly spoke and Clarke narrowed her eyes as the words ' _Skai gada_ ' and ' _kwelnes_ ' were used in tandem with ' _branwada_ ' and several other words Clarke knew were not positive. Lexa's hand went up and her eyes went towards Clarke, clearly seeing she understood the words being spoken. "Clarke…"

" _Shof op spicha!_ " She threw out the insult as she left the tent, not caring as she heard Indra draw her sword as she exited the warm interior.

Clarke make it to the horse pen to see the horse she rode in on tied to a post with her pack still attached. She untied the horse and steadied the animal as she moved to mount it. Once on the horse she was about to move when a tall figure stepped in front of the animal and took a hold of the reins. She came face to face with Ryder after so many months and all he did was look at her as she held onto the horse's reins, not allowing the animal to move.

"Ryder let the horse go."

"I cannot, _Heda_ knows you would leave so I was sent to stop you." He moved slightly and held out his hand. "Come, a warm meal is being prepared and _Heda_ is seeing to private quarters being established for you."

Clarke's anger filled her as she thought about what Indra told Lexa in the tent. About how it was foolish to go after a single girl and that sacrificing herself to have Clarke would have caused more damage to the clans. The fact that Lexa went after her not because of the ritual trial she was required to undertake, apparently that was real, but because the Ice Nation's queen had silently requested the capture of the girl who made _Heda_ weak. Her name was legendary after the mountain and it wasn't hard to learn through the seemly quick vocal route that grounders used that she'd spent her nights in Lexa's tent. Assumptions were being made about their relationship but that didn't matter to Clarke because people talked, it was normal human nature to gossip. She was angry that Lexa hadn't told her that the Ice Nation had a bounty on her, not just one warrior. At least before they arrived to Tondc and were well away from the village she'd been in. It had been a manipulation on the leader's part.

" _Heda_ can keep the meal and the quarters, I want to return to my people." Clarke stared down at the burly man. "You still have to follow my orders so let the horse go."

He chuckled, "we are no longer at war Clarke of the Sky People, those orders to listen to you have become silent. _Heda_ stated that I was only to follow your orders as long as we fought side by side. So at this time I only follow the orders of _Heda_."

* * *

Knowing she wouldn't be going anywhere unless on foot and that wasn't a pleasant journey, Clarke dismounted the horse and grabbed her saddle bag before trudging back to the tent at the center of the village. Ryder had stayed with the horse till she was far away from the animal. She found Lexa had removed her armor and only stood in her leggings and tunic as she reviewed the official looking papers that rested on her war table. It had been cleared away and held nothing more than a wide map of several territories and diplomatic papers.

"Has your anger been calmed?" Lexa didn't even look up as Clarke entered. The blond dumped her bag on the stool by the table and stood on the other side of the table.

"You lied to me, about why you came to get me."

Lexa looked up to see sky blue eyes turned to cobalt blue, clearly Clarke was angry. "I did not lie, I merely did not state fully why I was there. Not all the villages are aware of the threat, small villages like the one you resided in do not encounter such gossip and few warriors come from such villages. It was better they do not know so none would be tempted to turn you over to the queen for hunting territory or a favor if their children ever stumble beyond the boundary. Children have been lost because they were merely playing in the woods, captured by _Azkru_ warriors and without pity or understanding they are murdered."

"You could have told me…"

"Your anger consumed you and I could not trust you would keep silent. You challenged me to a fight, stating the deaths of Gustus and Anya as if common information. Such matters have no weight if spoken but the bounty on your head would have carried more weight than all the lives in the village." Lexa looked back at the paper. "Be angry if you wish Clarke but I make decisions with my head and not my heart."

"That's a lie and we both know it."

Lexa's hand stopped moving across the paper and flattened against the paper. "I will state this once Clarke and I expect it never forgotten." Green eyes looked up to meet blue, "two vows are made when we take the mantle upon completing the trial. The first is to lead the clans with my life, never to abandon them no matter the cost to myself as long as my spirit remains in this body. The second is that no object or person comes before the clans. I was to accept I would have no wife, no children and no family beyond my people." She looked down quickly before looking up. "I made the mistake of breaking one of those vows years ago and a priest nearing death spoke his last foresight to me. He said the gods were angry that I broke my vow, thinking I was greater than them. He stated they would punish me before the moon arrived and he was right. Two weeks before the moon arrived Costia was stolen from me and the night of the moon, her head was delivered to me." Lexa rounded the table till she was a foot away from Clarke. "I shall not defy the gods again, no matter what my heart screams for me to have. That night on the mountain, I was given a reminder by one of the battle priests that if I defied the gods a second time I would face a punishment twice as harsh."

Clarke looked to the side, "so you made the choice on the mountain with your heart instead of your head despite what you told me."

"No, I agreed to the deal with my head. I was considering going back and was preparing to when the priest found me. He told me the warning and I stayed in camp as I would not see you suffer a fate twice as painful as Costia."

"But I already did!" Clarke practically hissed and tore her head up to look at Lexa. "Death would have been a mercy after what I did. I killed innocent children, innocent people who had no idea what the others were doing. I sacrificed over three hundred people for just over forty, that's a genocide."

* * *

Lexa backed away and removed to the other side of the table. "The gods do not give us more than we can handle and you were chosen by them. Your name was spoken in the temple before word of the mountain's defeat reached them. They said that the gods had chosen the next _Wanheda_ , a messenger of death and peace from the gods. A girl born among the stars, hair like the sun, eyes as the sky and death coming from the air she breaths and fire from the ground she walks on. She would bring peace to the clans after decades of war."

"You're making that up."

"I do not speak for the gods nor would I attempt to." Lexa looked up at blue eyes, "I am not foolish enough to do such a thing."

Shuffling made both look to the entrance to see Ryder in the doorway, he moved aside to let a young teenager in. The girl was carrying a covered bowl surrounded by two cloths, she placed it on a nearby side table and turned to Lexa. A simple nod was all the leader gave her and she left without a word but there was a smile on her face.

"What was that?"

"That is warm stew made by Mila, she is the daughter of one of the warriors but due to loss of sight in her eye as a child she is not permitted on the battlefield. She prepares food for all the warriors in some fashion when they return from a long journey so they are not forced to cook while resting." Lexa pulled two bowls from a box as well as two metal objects that looked like spoons. "You will enjoy this stew and I am sure if you ask nicely she will supply you with the method of making it."

Clarke accepted the bowl Lexa held out and sighed. "This doesn't mean I forgive you."

"I never expect your forgiveness Clarke." Lexa motioned to the war table and removed Clarke's bag to allow her to sit on the stool. "But I do hope your anger will calm and we can move past the events that happened on the mountain."

"Maybe," Clarke took a bite of the stew and paused. "This is really good."

* * *

The sounds of shouting woke Clarke from where she lay on the cot that had been set up in the private area of Lexa's tent. A cloth had been hung to separate the area in two so Clarke could have a separate section from Lexa, privacy that she deserved according to her anticipated rank. The cloth was moved aside and Lexa moved into the area as Clarke sat up, she put a finger to her lips indicating that Clarke was to be silent.

Clarke gave a nod, Lexa rarely ordered or requested her silence as she didn't mind the former sky leader speaking her mind. If she required silence then it meant something serious was happening that the leader didn't want Clarke dragged into. A quick motion meant for Clarke to keep her ears open and listen to what was said. The woman quickly disappeared beyond the area and pulled the curtain that separated the two areas from the main part of the tent closed.

Sitting on the warm bear fur, Clarke listened as Lexa welcomed someone but it was clear that the person spoke with words that were unfamiliar to Clarke. She couldn't make out what was being said and got off the bed, moved to the curtain to look beyond it. A small sliver was pushed aside and Clarke saw Lexa on her throne with a man in white garments standing before her speaking rapidly.

Lexa stood quickly and grabbed the man by his cloak, staring down at him. "You would dare to anger the gods by silencing one before they are chosen?"

"It is important she never succeed, the last foresight saw peace but on the battlefield of death. She was seen to align with her enemy and destroy those who challenge them. She will align with _Azgeda_ , _Heda_ if _Wanheda_ aligns with the _Azkru Kwin_ then we are all doomed."

"You said she would align with her enemy, did you ever consider the words spoken?"

"Yes, it has been examined for days by many priests. You must help us hunt her down and stop her before she reaches Polis."

Lexa looked towards the private area, "Clarke, come meet our guest."

* * *

Clarke moved from beyond the area and saw the man take in her appearance. "You…you are her, the girl who will become Wanheda. You will destroy us all."

"I would never align myself with the Ice Nation." Clarke stated and narrowed her eyes, " _Heda_ , let the poor priest go before he dies from fear."

Lexa let the priest go and he took a few steps back, he waved a finger. "You say you would not but the gods have shown us that you will."

"Your readers are not well trained." Lexa moved to pour herself a glass of water as she spoke. "She will become _Wanheda_ , making her the enemy of the current _Heda_ as there have never been two before." After taking a sip she looked at the man, "we will align together as we have before and take on the _Azgeda_. The queen has already put a bounty on her head."

He looked to Clarke and then back to Lexa and then back again. "The people whisper that _Heda_ took a sky girl as her lover. You are she, the sky girl who will be _Wanheda_ , the one who defeated the mountain." His eyes tore to Lexa, "you have defied the gods a second time, placing one before your people."

"Oh trust me, she didn't." Clarke rolled her eyes as she sat one the nearby stool. "She took her people and abandoned both me and my people at the mountain. She sacrificed everything to keep her people safe, even her heart." Blue eyes met green, "she is and always will be _Heda_ , her heart has no room for anyone else but her people." Clarke stood up and looked at the man as she started towards the separate area. "Please do me a favor and tell everyone who thinks I'm her lover that I never was. We were allies planning a war, that and she was trying to kill my people for knowing her secrets. We were never lovers and never shall be, we're barely even friends."

Lexa nodded her head, "go Maxim and explain that the readers were wrong. I shall bring Clarke to the temple upon our arrival so she may undergo the trial."

"Of course _Heda_." He looked towards Clarke, "forgive me thoughts of killing you."

"You aren't the first to try to kill me and I'm positive you won't be the last." He hurried away and Clarke pushed the curtain aside when Lexa caught her arm.

* * *

Clarke turned to demand the woman let go of her arm when chapped lips met her own. The blond found herself unable to be angry and leaned into the hand that came up to cup her cheek. After a few moments Lexa pulled away and stared into blue eyes. She smiled before letting Clarke go and disappearing into her small area, leaving the sky girl staring into empty space confused.

"Lexa, what was that?"

"Punishment for your recklessness." The brunette came into view as Clarke pushed back the curtain that separated the two spaces.

"I didn't do anything reckless."

Green eyes held wonder in them and Lexa just smiled. "You challenged the gods when ordered me to let go of Maxim."

"How exactly did I challenge the gods? Did they tell you to scare him?"

"No," the brunette looked into her eyes as she stood to draw the curtain closed. "You were more beautiful than the sunrise and my breath was lost at such beauty." With a smirk she closed the curtain, "goodnight Clarke, sleep well."

The blond shook her head and muttered to herself, "more beautiful than a sunrise, my breath was lost at such beauty. Where is she getting this from? I'm covered in scars, I haven't bathed in days and she comparing me to a goddess? Maybe the blows to the head did some damage."

* * *

A/N: Well apparently Lexa is breaking rules left and right, who knew?

Next: The arrival at Polis and Clarke sees that the Grounders are much more than warriors in tents.

Please read and review...


	5. The Stars Speak of Life

Hatred into Love

Spoilers: All Season 1 and Season 2 of the 100; Spoilers from San Diego Comic Con The 100 Panel

Disclaimer: I own nothing!

* * *

It was nearly night when the two horses approached Polis, Clarke let her gaze fall upon the battered metal gate of what could only be described as an attempt to keep others out. It was effectively defendable and would keep out an invading army despite the rusted metal and bent shape. It opened as they neared and two warriors stood with torches, one at each door and neither moved till their horses were beyond the gate.

Clarke looked back to see them closing it by way of large ropes, it seemed to be easier to open than close if their tugging was any indication. Turning back around she found herself amazed at where her horse was taking her, she was riding down the middle of a street with buildings made of wood or stone on either side. They weren't houses either but business, clearly part of a market of some kind as stalls standing outside them were cleared for the night.

"Welcome to Polis." Lexa's voice was firm but Clarke recognized the tone as genuine, she really was welcoming her to the city. "We are going to go beyond the trade district into the political heart where the temple and the Council House reside. Once beyond that is where homes and the palace lay."

"Let me guess, you live in the palace?"

Lexa looked to the side and Clarke let her gaze meet that of the woman beside her. "Yes, however the palace is not solely my home but also a school, healing center, a home for children without those to care for them and also where the leaders and guests reside when staying in Polis."

"So it's for the people?"

"I made it so once I became _Heda_ , those previous kept it to themselves when they clans needed the space more than one person. I have quarters to myself but the rest is for those that reside here."

Clarke looked ahead and nodded, "I think I'm beginning to understand what Kane meant when he called you a visionary."

* * *

The dark made it hard to see everything but Clarke found light seemed to illuminate the temple as they approached it. It had obviously once been a grand building but had been repaired by grounder standards and not the world before. Lexa stopped her horse and Clarke nudged on the reins as she saw a woman dressed in white cloth and a white cloak, one like what Maxim wore, standing on the steps of the temple.

The woman descended the steps as both women dismounted their horses. Lexa bowed her head and Clarke did as well since she figured it was a sign of respect. The woman stopped mere feet from them and instantly used a finger to lift Clarke's chin up. She surveyed Clarke in the light of the fire that burned in a large brazier nearby.

"You look as the prophecy states and of the one who has done many things only one touched by the gods could do. However, your heart must be judged and that will determine if the gods have truly chosen you to be called _Wanheda_." The woman turned her attention to Lexa, "your friendship will suffer if she has been chosen. The people will question who to follow, the one chosen by the gods or the one sent by them. One brought peace but the other brought freedom after years of slavery and fear." The woman took a step back, "go _Heda_ , the girl will stay here until the trial has been completed. Her heart cannot waver but her mind can, being around you has already caused enough trouble."

Lexa looked at Clarke, "you are safe with Marta and the priests, she will care for you as I have."

"Your care is the concern, you allow your emotions to guide you towards breaking your oaths for a second time." Marta stated and looked to Lexa, "you cannot be allowed such things or your mind falters and you risk your people. The gods do not forgive a second time."

Clarke nodded towards the horse, "go, I'll be here whenever you need someone to kick your ass."

A slight smile emerged on Lexa's face as she moved to mount her horse. Turning it away she paused when Marta spoke, "take the horse, she has no need of it here."

Lexa grabbed the spar horse's reins and paused to allow Clarke to retrieve her bag before moving away from the two women. She disappeared down the street and Clarke turned to look at Marta as the woman stared at her slightly.

"She is _Heda_ , how do you have the right to command her?"

"Those that speak for the gods have authority over all, this you will learn while you are here Clarke of the Sky People." Marta turned and started up the steps. "Come, it is late and you require rest before your preparation."

* * *

Walking into the temple Clarke found herself amid thousands of candles and floor that seemed to stay polished even after a hundred years. A large red cloth lead towards the front where an alter was set up, however midway the red ended and was replaced by white. Walking from beside Marta, Clarke let herself walk towards the alter at the front where a large carving hung over it. A bird holding it's wings out over a tree and under the tree was a fish, which rested on top of a skull. A fire sat on the alter in a brazier that had images cut along the side of it, creating warmth in the massive room and casting shadows on the wall of the four objects that hung on the carving.

"The gods you worship, they are represented by these figures?" Clarke spoke quietly knowing Marta was behind her.

"Yes, legend states that each has a voice and will speak through a leader. Each leader will be chosen by the way of the gods, trials set for each of them designed by the god that choses them. However, legend also states that only one leader can reside at a time without chaos for the gods know peace only from the cycle and would not disrupt it without a plan of greatness or death for the people." Marta came to stand beside her, "greatness has already passed, your choosing can only bring death."

Clarke nodded, " _Wanheda_ , Commander of Death."

"You walk with death Clarke of the Sky People, it is your companion and thus you represent Jula, goddess of death."

"Which does Lexa represent?"

"Forsa, goddess of rebirth." Marta put a hand to Clarke's arm, "come, you require rest before you begin the first of the trial tomorrow."

They started walking towards the side of the temple, "first of the trial?"

"There are four parts, each part of the trial you will be tested in the method of one of the gods. Your test will be positive, this we have foreseen and as your companion is death you will pass Jula's test."

Clarke paused and looked at the woman, "your reader was wrong so how do you know you're not wrong now?" She looked to the side before speaking again. "Tell me of your gods."

"There are five gods, four who hold the ground and the fifth who holds the stars. Aven who makes the stars and creates all, Sora who watches the sky and guides, Forsa who is reborn in every being and gives life, Joss that provides the rain and rivers to keep life alive and Jula who takes life in her grasp when she sees fit. Aven and Forsa are forever paired, linked together as mates and make it so life can always be reborn. Sora and Joss are forever paired, linked together as mates to protect life and see it thrive. Jula is alone, death coming to whoever she touches."

"I think," Clarke looked at the woman before her, "that everyone has a bit of all of the gods in them. We don't just solely have one instinct, we thrive at being all at once."

Marta nodded, "you are wise sky girl, this is true but your wisdom is also an indicator of death. You will begin tomorrow by undergoing Aven's test, the hardest and none have succeeded before so be warned that you will fail. Aven does not give leaders, he alone leads and creates. When the test ends know you did well and will succeed at the last test when Jula's is administered."

"I don't think your gods would appreciate you telling others what will and won't happen like you're one of them." Clarke watched Marta's head go up and eyes narrow. "We're all human, we do as the gods instruct or so human history has stated that we are frail and weak while gods are strong."

"Watch your tongue girl, you insult the gods and their voices."

* * *

The next morning Clarke was woken and taken to a bath, she bathed and allowed herself a moment to think. She found herself questioning why she was agreeing to the tests when she didn't believe in any of it. More so she saw through the so-called voices, the priests believed they had more power than they actually did. It was something she'd have to speak to Lexa about, at least when she saw the woman again as it seemed Marta didn't want them near each other.

A knock made Clarke sit up in the bath as a girl no more than ten entered with clothes and quickly left, the child hadn't even looked her way. Leaving the bath, the former sky leader dried off with a large cloth that had been set aside and quickly found the dress that had been laid out for her. It was white and long, similar to the one that Marta wore and Clarke wondered if Lexa had worn a dress similar when she'd undergone the trial. It made her curious to see the leader in anything other than the familiar black she always wore.

Once dressed she exited the room to find Marta waiting, the woman seemed annoyed but walked away. As the night before, Clarke followed her till they were once again in the temple's main hall and she saw a man preparing what appeared to be a pot of grass. He lit the grass and set it on the ground, backing up before nodding to Marta. The woman moved to Clarke and seized her arm, walking her towards the pot.

"Breath in the smoke and allow your mind to open to the will of the gods. I will warn you now you will become sick shortly after inhaling but will recover within hours. None have lasted long enough to see visions but rest assure that is expected as Aven does not choose leaders."

She backed away and Clarke rolled her eyes before kneeling on the ground. Looking up she saw all the priests and even Lexa standing nearby watching. Before leaning in to breath in the smoke she saw the woman who'd traveled with her give a slight smile and an even slighter reassuring nod. Clarke leaned over and breathed in the smoke, it was sweet but had a hint of death to it. She felt ill to her stomach and felt the gravity fall from underneath her, falling to the side and rolled onto her back. Darkness filtered to her as voices were used, Trigedasleng being ordered by Marta that she be moved immediately to her small set of quarters.

* * *

 _ **Darkness was instantly filled with light and Clarke found herself standing in her cell again, surrounded by her drawings and there before her stood her father. She took a few steps towards him and held out her hand but he did not touch her, he only smiled.**_

 _" **Dad?" She looked around, "why am I here?"**_

 _" **Why do you think you are here Clarke?"**_

 _ **Clarke shook her head as she looked around, "the test, to see if I was chosen by the god of the clans. Aven's test but no one passes it or so the priestess keeps telling me. She keeps telling me I was chosen by death and maybe I am." She sat on the bunk, surprised it didn't fall from under her. "I've killed so many…"**_

 _" **You kill but you have the hands to save." Her father stated and sat beside her, not touching her as she looked at him. "Your mother taught you to heal and you have saved lives, you saved Lexa. You allowed her to lead her people, to save the clans from internal war upon her death. Your choices have killed many but your hands have saved many more."**_

 _ **The blond looked down and smiled, "he who creates life can also take it away but at great cost to one's self. That's what we were taught on the Ark, that one life helps create life for others and one life can also take life away from others. We risk ourselves to save all those around us, to lead means to make the choices no other can make. Creating peace is like creating life," she looked up at the ceiling to see the stars. "We give a piece of ourselves to give to others, even if we sacrifice a better part of ourselves to do it."**_

 _" **Are you at peace Clarke, is your anger now calm?" Clarke looked to the side to see not her father but Lexa, which was strange because Lexa had never been off the ground.**_

 _ **A part of her recognized the test immediately was drawing on things familiar to her and making her use them to process what was being said. "I'm not at peace, I won't be at peace until we all and if I have to give my life to protect everyone I will."**_

* * *

Marta stood beside Lexa as they watched the healer tend to Clarke, the blond continuously speaking despite being away from the smoke of the test. The healer stood and met Marta's eyes as he moved around the bed. "She is well, the smoke has not created sickness like with _Heda_ and the candidates."

"She speaks of peace and creating life, of protecting the life created." Maxim stated as he neared the two. "She has passed Aven's test, she has been chosen by him as _Heda_."

"That cannot be, we saw her chosen by Jula."

Lexa bent beside the bed and placed hand on Clarke's forehead. "You have been chosen by Aven, you have not been chosen by death." She looked over to see Marta starring at Clarke, clearly annoyed by the result of the test. "The gods have chosen, she does not require the additional tests."

" _Heda_ ," Maxim took a step towards the bed. "The trial is not complete without undergoing all the tests. She will fail those to come but she must undergo them to be claimed fully by the gods."

Marta turned to one of the priests there, "where is the scroll containing the writings of Aven? Bring it to me, this must be a mistake because Aven would not choose one not of our people."

"The gods do not make mistakes." Lexa stood up and looked at Marta. "I shall see the scroll myself when you read it, I want to know what was said. We do not know where the prophecy comes from and perhaps we shall uncover it."

* * *

It took an hour but the priest returned with the scroll and Lexa stood from where she sat beside Clarke, who had finally settled to sleep, to sit beside Marta. Maxim unrolled the scroll and each of the three began reading the roll of paper. Aven was the god least spoken about and very little was recorded other than how the world came to be and why.

"The prophecy comes from this text." Maxim stated as he pointed to lines. "However, it does not say she will be the messenger of the gods but instead Aven's messenger." He looked at Marta as she sat back annoyed. "Clarke of the Sky People was chosen as his messenger, she is not from the gods but sent by Aven to be Heda."

Marta stood and moved to stand before Clarke's bed, "what makes one who is companion of death so worthy that Aven would chose her over the people that have faithfully served him for generations?"

Maxim smiled and motioned to the scroll so Lexa would pay attention. She read the passage he pointed to and looked up at him. "So I am not to walk alone."

"No it would seem not _Heda_. The fifth _Heda_ , you, was merely required to wait for the messenger so that the chosen of Forsa and the chosen of Aven could be bound like the gods." He dared to squeeze her hand, "the gods take which we want and give what we need."

"What are you speaking of?" Marta turned and Maxim motioned to the scroll.

" _Heda_ is not meant to walk life alone, she was meant to wait on the messenger. They shall walk bound together, forever linked as Aven and Forsa are. By choosing Clarke of the Sky People, she is not breaking her oaths to the gods but fulfilling them."

Marta glared at both before storming from the room, "all will see this is a mistaken when Jula chooses her and when she is chosen by Jula she cannot be chosen by another. She may have been chosen by Aven but he will release her when Jula takes her companion."

Lexa ignored the woman and returned to Clarke's side, taking her hand gently. "Rest Clarke, the rest of the trial is ahead and although you will fail, you will do so in great honor." Brushing back a soft strand of blond hair she gave a slight smile. "The gods have chosen us to bring peace to our people and I shall stand beside you in all matters from this day forward. No deals and no betrayal, I shall earn your trust and loyalty back."

* * *

A/N: Just because the 'prophecy' says they'll be together doesn't mean Clarke believes it or not.

Next: Clarke undergoes two more tests and Lexa manages to sneak her out in order to visit the market.

Please read and review...


	6. Spirit of Life and Death

Hatred into Love

Spoilers: All Season 1 and Season 2 of the 100; Spoilers from San Diego Comic Con The 100 Panel

Disclaimer: I own nothing!

* * *

Clarke stared at the large tree that stood before her, she turned to look at Maxim as the priest stood beside her. Marta stood feet away with several other priests and Lexa, all waiting for her to perform the task laid before her. She turned back to the tree and stared up as she tried to figure out how she was supposed to get all the way to the top.

"You expect me to climb that?"

"Yes and you are to retrieve the chosen item of Forsa's that lay on one of the many branches." Maxim looked at Clarke, "even if you fail the test it will be done with honor. You have been chosen as Aven's messenger and that is greatness even upon falling the tests of Sora and Joss."

Sighing she looked up again, "how am I supposed to get up there?"

"That is part of the test, you must listen and allow Forsa to guide your actions." Maxim stated as he took a few steps back

Clarke walked to the tree, circling it's wide base to look for any indentation that could give her a boost onto the trunk. However it was bare of anything that could be used as leverage and given that she hadn't been climbing trees her whole life like the previous passer of the test she doubted she'd be getting up by her hands alone.

"Just for the record," Clarke spoke as she rounded the tree and let her eyes rest on Lexa. "The fact you did this when you were twelve makes me want to kick your ass because this is impossible."

Lexa held humor in her eyes despite not giving it away on her face, "we shall speak more on the subject later but for now you will climb the tree."

* * *

Clarke narrowed her eyes as she noticed Lexa's hand rest on her sword as it normally did when attempting to ease her nervousness. It struck her that one way up the tree was with blades so she bent down and withdrew her knife from her boot, digging into the bark of the tree with the hope it was soft enough. It wasn't as soft as she'd like but it wasn't too hard not to allow the knife to get some leverage.

"Give me your knife." She turned to Lexa but the woman shook her head.

Lexa looked down before looking up. "I cannot assist you in any manner Clarke, the tests must be undertaken by one's self."

Clarke turned back to the tree and backed up a few feet to look up at the branches, they didn't start for at least a dozen feet or so. Tilting her head as the sun filled the tree canopy, the blond saw the glint of something on the second branch. Pulling her gun from her other boot, she heard continued gasped and panic but Lexa's voice instantly silenced their panic.

Aiming the weapon at the glint she fired the weapon, her last bullet exited the chamber. A ping was heard after the discharge and Clarke took a step back as an engraved metal shield fell to the ground at the base of the tree. Bending down she saw the tree and biohazard symbol that Lexa used as an emblem emblazed on the metal. Picking it up she turned it to show those watching.

"Was this what I was supposed to retrieve?" She shrugged and handed it off to Maxim as she walked past them towards the path that they'd taken from Polis.

* * *

Lexa let a soft smirk go as she turned to follow Clarke while everyone else seemed to stay in place for a few moments. Clarke noticed Lexa out of the corner of her eye and the footsteps moments later signified the others were following. Silence was all that accompanied them to the temple and only once inside did the commotion begin.

"She failed the test!" Marta remarked and everyone turned to her. "She only completed half the assigned tasks and used a forbidden weapon to do so."

Clarke snorted, "forbidden to you maybe but guns are a part of my culture. Using them isn't prohibited to me and in case you've forgotten, the Mountain Men can't punish you anymore for using them."

Maxim looked between the two, "it is true that you failed the test, you were required to climb the tree to retrieve the shield. However, Forsa's chosen stands before us so it is expected that you would fail the test as a chosen cannot occupy two beings at once. A single spirit for a single body."

One of the older priests took a step forward, "rest for we will continue with the tests after night has settled upon us. Jula's test requires darkness and fire so we wait."

"If she passes this last test then she will bring unrest." Marta exclaimed, "death cannot live with life. Death does not guide or provide for the people, it takes all it consumes."

"What would you do to prevent such a thing?" Lexa took a step towards the priestess. "Would you slit her throat as you persuaded Maxim to do before her arrival?"

The woman was silent and Clarke narrowed her eyes as she walked towards the woman, stopping only when she was beside Lexa. "Your silence says you agree with that. What would my death bring? Disrespect from the gods no doubt..."

"You do not believe in them, you only undergo these tests because we force you to." Marta spat in Clarke's direction. "You come and place yourself in our ways, taking and demanding as you see fit and have convinced another to give us false prophecy and readings to make us believe you are chosen." She took a few steps towards Clarke, "you are not chosen, you are death's companion and you will destroy us all."

Clarke took a step back from the woman. "I think the power you wave as priestess has clouded your idea of reality." She nodded toward Maxim, "I will leave until sunset so everyone can calm down."

* * *

With that she left, a part of her accepting what was said as true but she knew the woman didn't know her. She respected the culture and the religion but she didn't agree with it. Life seemed to be too harsh to have gods that protected and guided. Lexa seemed to believe the trial was important and had been willing to take her back to her camp after the tests so she let them continue. They were similar than going to war over something as stupid as beliefs. In reality Clarke found herself wondering why she continued with the charade as the tasks just showed she had a bit of everything in her. She healed just as much as she took lives, guided her people to safety and gave peace at the cost of herself.

Walking through the streets of Polis, Clarke allowed herself to take in the life that resided there. Children ran through the streets with balls and toys, laughing and smiling while adults traded or spoke to one another. She got glances but she ignored them as if they were nothing to worry about. It was a fresh difference from the harsh life she'd endured since her arrival on the planet. Life instead of death, peace instead of war or battlefields full of blood.

Stopping at a stall that held various pieces of jewelry and weapons she visually examined each piece with her hands kept behind her back. The stall owner smiled at her, an older woman that seemed to motion to the goods as if offering something. The girl that stood beside the woman smiled at her, she was probably a year or two older than Clarke.

"I have nothing to trade." Her Trigedasleng was limited to mostly war or phrases that were related to war.

" _Gona?_ " The girl spoke and motioned to a knife but Clarke shook her head.

" _No gona, ai laik Klark kom Skaikru_."

The girl looked over at the woman, clearly her mother, before turning back to Clarke. " _Wanheda?_ " The blond nodded and instantly the girl picked up one of the knives, thrusting it out towards Clarke. " _Mochof, yu taik au Maunon_."

Clarke accepted the knife as she knew she wouldn't get away from leaving without it. The girl bowed her head and backed up gently. " _Mochof._ " The woman nodded and put an arm around her daughter, smiling to Clarke before turning her attention to a second customer.

* * *

Clarke sheathed the sword in her boot before moving on to the other stalls. The man at the next stall held out a small cloth full of fruit, clearly not allowing her to leave without it. He thanked her for the mountain and while it made her sick to think about why they were so grateful, she didn't say anything other than thank them. The idea that she'd committed genocide yet the clans saw a hero made her want to curl up on her bed for days.

Finding a bench along an area that could only be described as a park, Clarke allowed herself to enjoy some of the fruit. It wasn't long before children gathered around her, unafraid in the fact they had no knowledge of her, holding out their hands for fruit. Smiling, she dispersed the fruit between all ten of them and then watched them go, not caring she had none of the exotic fruit left to try for the first time.

One of the children ran over and held out a ball to her, as if expecting her to play. She took it from him and stood up, kicking it towards the others. Instantly he was laughing and running after it, a small girl no older than five grabbed her hand and started pulling her towards the group of children. It wasn't long before she was pulled into a game of keep-away but despite her size and speed, the children's advantage of having played longer kept the ball from her.

She fell to the ground in laugher as the kids jumped up and down when one of the boys kicked it through a metal ring a few feet away. The children practically threw themselves on her, tackling her and Clarke found herself happy for the first time in a while. The kids didn't demand of her or judge her for her actions, they just wanted to play and have fun. It was only the lighting of the torches through the city that had them leaving, a wave goodbye all she received from them. No words had been exchanged the entire time she'd played with them, just laughter and some fun.

* * *

Standing, Clarke started back towards the temple and found Lexa on the last step waiting as if she'd been anticipating her. The woman smiled as the blond neared, she took the last step down and waited till Clarke stood inches from her.

"Did you enjoy the city?"

Clarke nodded, "I wish people would stop thanking me for the mountain. I committed genocide, it's not something to be thanking someone for. They should be condemning me for the murder of innocents and children."

"The Mountain harmed us for generations Clarke, it was expected that the next generation would be the same as the first. The clans cannot condemn you for something which you saved them and their children from. No more shall become reapers, no more shall die by the mountain's hand and the fear once lived in is now replaced with hope." Lexa turned and started up the stairs, Clarke following a step behind. "They thank you because you did what none have been able to do before."

"Whatever!" Clarke pushed past her into the temple and Lexa merely sighed, it was a useless battle to fight the blond on a lesson she was determined not to learn yet. In time she'd learn just as she always did.

The temple was dark except for the fire on the altar and Clarke stood silently as two men kneeled with ropes tied around them. They clearly looked like they'd been prisoners but for what crimes Clarke was unsure of. Maxim looked at her as she approached him, intent on finding out what was going on.

"Why are they here?"

"It is the final test, _Heda_ can explain as she is aware of them more than any of us."

Lexa moved to Clarke as the blond turned to look at her. "One is a prisoner, his crime is defiling a child and the other is innocent. Jula's test is one of perception, who deserves death and if chosen by Jula your instincts will guide you to the guilty man."

Clarke met green eyes, turned brown by the light of the fire, "I have to kill him don't I? What if I kill an innocent man?"

"He has volunteered, sickness will have Jula claiming him before the moon is upon us so a quick death would be a mercy."

* * *

Looking between both men she grabbed her knife from her boot and waited. She eyed both of them, both men seemed to stare at her in wonder of what she would do. She didn't take her eyes away because she needed to look into their eyes. It seemed like hours passed and she walked towards them, her eyes viewing every small movement that they made. She saw the one on the right lean towards her just a fraction, his eagerness for death a clear giveaway to who he was.

Without prompting, she turned on her heels and grabbed the other man's head. Her eyes blazed as she looked at Lexa. "Kill him if you want but I won't kill him, he deserves to die by the hand of the one he harmed. A quick death is a gift."

Maxim smiled as did Lexa, the woman gave an order and instantly two of her warriors were hauling the man away. Clarke cut the ropes of the other man and he nodded to her as if to thank her before walking out with the third warrior that waited for him. Clarke put her knife back in her boot and moved to the two.

"You did well Clarke of the Sky People."

"Sorry I failed but I won't kill him when it's not my place."

Maxim shook his head, "no you are _Wanheda_ , your spirit has been chosen by Jula but you also act as Aven's messenger. Your spirit is strange as it was chosen to hold both life and death. Never has anyone been chosen by two of the gods before and I suspect it shall never happen again."

Clarke looked to Lexa, "what does this mean?"

"It means you rest Clarke and receive the customary marking to signify your status. Once the marking is complete I shall return you to your camp and trade talks shall continue." Lexa took a step back before turning. "Come, I shall take you to the palace tonight so you may rest on something more comfortable than the floor."

* * *

A/N: I know it's a bit short but the next one will be longer.

Next: Clarke finds herself waking up to servants at her beck and call. She also undergoes a ceremony to gain a tattoo.

Please read and review...


	7. Chosen by Many

Hatred into Love

Spoilers: All Season 1 and Season 2 of the 100; Spoilers from San Diego Comic Con The 100 Panel

Disclaimer: I own nothing!

* * *

Instead of a hand to her shoulder, Clarke woke to the sun on her face and the warmth of furs cocooning her. She opened her eyes to see the window that stood against the wall of the guest quarters she resided in, the sun seemed to flood the room as she continued to wake. Sitting up, Clarke took in the room in the daylight instead of the fires that had burned out during the night. The walls were gray and the floor was covered in rugs that had been created from cloth and furs. The bed was three times any bed she'd seen and was beyond comfortable, as was expected with her being a guest. A table rested against the wall but it was bare as if waiting to be covered in something. The large chair that rested beside it looked to be more for functionality than comfort.

A knock on the door made Clarke turn her head towards the wooden barrier. "Enter." The door opened and two teenagers stood in the doorway, one holding a tray and the other had a cloth bundle wrapped with twine. Both smiled and moved inside, placing both on the bed while a middle-aged woman picked up the clothes on the floor. The girls giggled as Clarke fumbled from bed to take the clothes from the woman. "You don't have to do that."

"You are guest of Polis, it is my assigned task." The woman's English was simple enough to be fully understood but it wasn't refined like that which Lincoln and Lexa spoke.

"I assure you it's fine, please leave them." She held out her hands to accept the clothes and the woman gave her a displeased look as she handed them back. " _Mochof_. What is your name?"

The woman moved to the girls and turned them around. "Ara, call if you require anything _Wanheda_."

"I'm sure if I need something I can find it, you don't have to do everything for me."

The girls continued to giggle and quick Trigedasleng was thrown at both by Ara, who was no doubt their mother. The door shut behind them and Clarke looked down at the bed as she placed the clothes on the furs, seeing that the tray was filled with fruits, breads, cheeses and dried meats. It was food she'd seen during history lessons on the Ark but never had the chance to taste. Immediately grabbing a piece of cheese, she found herself overwhelmed by the taste and leaned back on the bed, it was the best thing she'd ever tasted before.

* * *

Walking through the palace later in the day, Clarke found various people either starring at her or bowing their head in respect. She allowed herself to just smile and ignore any attention she gave, she only asked for directions once and was redirected towards the east wing as she searched for the woman that made her home in the large palace. The east wing was the same as the rest of the palace, marble and stone with some wood and rugs through around in placed.

Guards at various doors alerted her that she was probably in the right place. The four armed men at one door told her that Lexa lay behind it and she knocked on the wooden barrier as the guards just gave her a small glance. Obviously it meant she was allowed to be in that place, they wouldn't dismiss her or run her through for daring to interrupt Lexa. A quick raised voice in Trigedsleng made Clarke open the door and she found Lexa standing at a window looking out at the ground below.

"You cause trouble with my staff on your first morning as a guest." Lexa stated as Clarke closed the door behind her. "Ara was very worried at your actions and I had to reassure the woman that while you are _Wanheda_ , you do not allow others to do what you can do yourself."

Clarke brushed her hand along the table in the middle of the room, surveying what seemed to be Lexa's private quarters. A bed as big as her own lay against the wall and bookshelves held books and scrolls alike. The table had several chairs and Clarke paused at the drawing of two girls by a river that lay on the wall. "Did you do this?"

"No," Lexa moved to Clarke and let herself eye the drawing. "Costia's mother drew the two of us as children, it was before I was called to be Heda. It was a union gift, or at least was meant to be." The brunette moved away and grabbed a pitcher, pouring water into a cup.

"You couldn't marry her could you?" Clarke's voice dropped as it often did when she spoke with Lexa of Costia. She knew the pain that mentioning the girl brought to Lexa. "Her mother thought it would happen and it didn't."

"Costia's mother hates me and while her tongue should have been cut out long ago for her words, I allow her to speak." Lexa turned and Clarke found green eyes staring at the picture. "She blames me for her daughter's death, she said if I had not broken my vows and let Costia be with another then her daughter would still be alive. While the words hurt, they are no less true."

Clarke looked down at her hands, "I'm sorry."

"Do not apologize Clarke, you understand my pain but know I allowed you the relief I never received." She turned and returned to the window, "I allowed you to kill Finn so you would not see the pain he would suffer. I still remember the agonizing look on Costia's face when her head was returned to me, there was little doubt she suffered."

"Thank you."

"Do not thank me, I deserve your hatred on that matter and that of the mountain. I expect your anger and hatred to calm but I know it will always be there." She looked over to meet blue eyes before looking back out the window.

* * *

The blond ran her hand along the books on the shelf, seeing a few she had read on the Ark as a young girl. "May I borrow one of these?"

"You may have whichever you wish," Lexa moved away from the window and over to Clarke. "I cannot read the words written, they were meant as gifts but the words inside are meaningless to me."

Clarke removed a book and smiled, "my father used to read this to me all the time as a little girl. Alice in Wonderland, it's about a girl who goes to a magical land where impossible things happen."

"Then it is yours." Lexa smiled at her softly, "one must remember the good memories that contain those we have lost. You rarely speak of your father but I know his loss weighs heavy on you. I wish you to remember the good memories you shared together."

"I don't hate you, I'm angry with you but I don't hate you." Clarke turned to meet green eyes as she clutched the old book to her chest. "Thank you for this."

Lexa touched Clarke's arm, running her hand up the smooth skin till she rested her hand on her bicep. "Your marking will go here, on your weapon arm and shall be a design dedicated to Aven and Jula."

"Like yours." She nodded to Lexa's tattoo and the woman shook her head. "Why not?"

"The many lines represent Forsa's weaving through lifetimes, rebirth through many and there were four Heda before me so that is why I have four markings. You are the first to have a spirit split in devotion so the design will come from the temple, unique and beautiful as its holder."

Clarke turned away from Lexa and her compliments, the continued compliments and gifts confused the blond. Lexa's actions caused her to be angered, the anger laying just below the surface because she couldn't allow her actions to affect anyone so she kept it to herself. Lexa was patient, giving gifts and compliments to win affection while waiting for anger to calm down but it surprised Clarke that Lexa didn't expect the anger to go away. Most would expect her to forget about it, leave it in the past but the brunette that patiently stood beside her, giving smiles and encouragement, seemed to understand that such events as the mountain lead to a lifetime of anger. "I should go, leave you to whatever business you have."

"I was preparing to go to the stables to examine the new foals, perhaps you would like to accompany me." Lexa moved past Clarke to the door and stood by it. "You may choose a horse as your own, my stables have many yet to be claimed."

The idea of having a horse like the one Lexa had was something she found herself eager to have. One that no one could take and would only respond to commands she gave but she knew such commands took time and her time was limited in Polis. The likelihood of gaining such an animal was small so she'd choose her own horse instead of riding multiple horses at different times. It'd be nice to have one just her own, to name and groom and even ride whenever she wished.

Placing the book on the table, she walked towards Lexa. "Any horse?"

"Any from those unclaimed but I must examine the animal first before I allow you to have it. I will not allow you to be given a weak horse that cannot carry you or a wild horse that would injure you."

* * *

The walk to the stables was shorter than Clarke expected but they did pass the training grounds of the fledgling warriors, young children who were preparing to become thirds. She stopped to watch them and Lexa paused beside her, surveying with pride in her eyes. It looked like chaos, it wasn't organized or methodical as the children played what Clarke assumed was a massive game of tag. Children chasing each other, weaving around each other as if trying to avoid both the one chasing them and those they were dodging to get away.

"What are they doing?"

"Playing as children do." Lexa gave a soft smirk, "their play teaches them the skills of evasion. Tomorrow they will go into the forest with a dozen warriors and practice their silence. Our training does not demand weapons in their hands as soon as they walk, we allow them to be children and to learn as they play."

"When you told me Polis would change how I saw your people, I thought I had seen everything there was to know you are different." Clarke met green eyes, "I was wrong. You are more civilized than we were on the Ark in so many ways. I hope my people can learn from yours so that we can grow too."

Lexa moved forward towards the children and gave a soft whistle, all stood still as much as young children were able to. They all beamed at seeing Lexa and hurried to her, sitting on the ground at her feet in a large mass as if waiting to a story. " _Heya yongons_."

"Hello _Heda_." The children repeated back in English instead of Trigedasleng, something Clarke found cute but also amazing. The children ranged between four and eight, all seemed to be learning at a pace far beyond those of the outlying villages.

" _Disha es Klark, lukot kom Trigeda_."

The children smiled at Clarke and all replied at once. "Hello Clarke."

She smiled at them and waved, "hello, are you having fun?"

One of the girls raised her hand and Lexa nodded to her so she spoke. "What is fun?"

Clarke thought for a moment, "I meant are you enjoying your training?"

Eager heads nodded and one of the boys raised his hand so Clarke gave him a nod to allow him to speak. " _Yu gona_?"

"We speak the warrior's tongue during training Elm, speak again and take time if you require to speak correctly." Lexa was patient with the boy, calm and even her voice had a gentle tone to it when she spoke. This was something that Clarke noticed and couldn't help smiling at the fact.

"Are you warrior?" The boy had to be maybe four or five, Clarke realized he probably was still learning English.

"No I'm not a warrior, I'm…" she paused not knowing what she was besides a murderer and a former leader. Since she left camp and obviously if Lexa was dealing with her mother it meant new leadership had taken over. It made her question what she was besides Clarke. "I'm just a girl."

Giggles erupted and one of the older girls raised her hand, Lexa's nod allowed her to speak. "You cannot be simply a girl, you must be something. What is your assigned task with your people?"

"I lead my people but I had to leave them so now I have no task." Clarke smiled at them and shrugged. "When I go back I'll find out what I'm assigned to do but for now I'm just Clarke."

Another of the girls stood up despite not raising her hand and moved to Clarke, hugging her. She looked up at the woman with a smile. "I am sorry you had to leave your people, _Trigeda_ will be your people if you have none."

"Thank you, what's your name?"

"Eva, I am seven winters." She backed up and sat down, keeping her eye low as Lexa gave her a parental glare that said all it needed to.

"Continue your training, I promised to show Clarke the stables."

The children all rose and bowed their heads in respect, one of the older boys raised his hand to ask a question. Lexa's nod allowed him to look at Clarke and ask the question she dreaded telling the children. "What clan do you come from?"

" _Skaikru_." She waited for their fear of her but there was buzzing of quick Trigedasleng, awed expressions and immediately a dozen questions asked.

They seemed to forget their placed and crowed around her asking anything and everything. Questions about the mountain, her people and where she came from were all asked at once. Some of the questions made her want to laugh and others made her want to hide in her bed for days, like asking how many mountain men she killed. Lexa seemed to sense her unease as she moved over and all the children took a step back.

"Your training must continue, I shall see if Clarke came come by your quarters this evening to tell you of her time in the sky and her journey to the ground. For now, return to your training."

As with all warriors, her orders were obeyed and they went back to their training. One of the older warriors redirected them towards their game and Lexa gently pulled Clarke away. The blond was silent as they moved towards the stables, she didn't want to even go anymore in favor of returning to her bed. Lexa's silence and patient understanding instead of speaking about the issue was the only thing that stopped Clarke lashing out in anger at the woman. Once again the fault of the mountain rested on the brunette beside her but Clarke calmed her anger so no one would suffer for her recklessness.

* * *

The stables were huge but modest at the same time, pens held enough space the horses could exercise while the metal and wood structure housed mothers and foals. Clarke touched one of the horses that stuck it's head out of the stall it was housed in.

"Hello there." She chuckled when a foal stuck it's small head over the door as well. "Hi there little guy." She attempted to touch it but it backed up, clearly skittish.

Lexa moved around Clarke, untying the rope that kept the door in place and opened it to go inside. Clarke move behind her and let her tie the rope back so the door wouldn't open while they were inside. "The foals are always examined, weaker horses are left as pray for the animals of the forest so they do not venture into the city and harm those here."

Clarke petted the mother while Lexa examined the foal, the young horse wasn't skittish around Lexa. Instead it tried to chew on her hair, that allowed Clarke to laugh for the first time since the day before playing with the children in the park. Finally the woman stood and petted the neck of the black foal. "Does he get to live?"

"He is strong and will one day carry someone." Lexa smiled at Clarke, "so yes he will live."

Three more foals were examined and all found healthy, something Lexa said never occurred. There was always one foal that was weak or deformed, it caused Clarke to just smile as they walked towards the pens of available horses. Climbing onto the wooden fence, Clarke allowed herself to examine the horses and decide which three she liked best.

As soon as her three favorites were chosen, Lexa had one of the horse caretakers bring the horses out to be examined. Clarke hoped that the black mare was healthy enough, she felt the horse was hers but she knew no matter what she wanted, Lexa would not give her the horse if it was lame or wild. The first horse, a roan mare, jumped when Lexa tried to examine her leg so the woman backed off.

"Put this one up, it's not suitable for Wanheda." It was a command and immediately one of the caretakers took the horse back to the pen.

Lexa examined the second, a white stallion and it was perfectly fine. Clarke realized that even if she didn't gain the black mare, the white stallion was just as perfect. "She's the one I want so I'm hoping she's fine."

"She does not startle and is already affectionate with you." Lexa noticed how the horse nudged at Clarke as she petted the animal's neck. "I shall examine her and determine if she is strong."

In the end, Lexa had the caretakers leave with the white stallion. Clarke smiled as she rubbed the horse's neck, "you're mine." The horse seemed to just knicker and go for Clark's hair, she laughed as she pushed the horse's head away.

"Come Clarke, it is nearly noon and you need to prepare for your marking."

Clarke ran her hand down the horse's back, "nobody will take her?"

"No, she will be placed in the stables with my own horse so she is not seen as unclaimed." Lexa motioned to one of the men and he came over. "Place the horse with my own, give it the same treatment as my own receives."

" _Sha Heda_." The caretaker took the horse from Clarke and walked it into the stables.

* * *

By the time they reached the palace, it seemed something big had occurred. People were buzzing around, preparing things and Clarke saw from a window that the town was busier than what she'd seen since her arrival. Pausing at a window she looked to the side to see Lexa waiting.

"What is going on?"

"The ceremony is celebrated by all, you are Wanheda not a simple warrior. Preparations for the festival tonight are underway and it will be accessible to all of Polis. Your marking will be done in public so all know who you are."

"I didn't realize…"

"That you are to be celebrated?" Clarke nodded, "I shall inform all that come that no questions can be asked about the mountain. I will not subject you to something you find repulsive Clarke, but the people will be allowed to thank you."

Clarke rubbed her arms, "they're thanking me for genocide."

"They are thanking you for their freedom."

"Same difference." She started walking and Lexa caught up to walk beside her.

"Clarke…"

"Just leave me alone." Clarke stopped and turned to face Lexa, "I don't want any of this. I respect your culture, I love your city but all of this isn't what I want. I just want to go home Lexa, to my people and try to put the past behind me. I did your trial, you get to give me the stupid title but it's over, I want to go home." Without another word she ran down the hall, ignoring those that stood watching her after her yelling fit. Lexa looked around and everyone continued to go about their business.

* * *

The sound of a knock on the wooden door to her room made Clarke look at the window to see it was getting darker, it was nearly night. The knock became persistent but she ignored it till the door opened and slammed shut. Sitting up she saw Marta standing by the door.

"You disrespect us, we give you the trial that is given to very few and instead of doing what is expected of you, you whine like a child."

Clarke shook her head, "you can think what you want Marta but I don't answer to you."

"I am a voice to the gods, you will answer me child!" The woman moved over to Clarke and grabbed her arm, pulling her up. "You will receive the marking and then you will leave this city never to return."

"Get away from me." Clarke pulled the knife from her hip and put to the woman's belly. "I don't answer to you, _Heda_ doesn't answer to you and you need to understand that just because you devoted your life to your gods, it doesn't make you one."

"How dare you!" The woman slapped Clarke as she backed up. "The gods chose me to speak for them and you are nothing, passing the trial means nothing if you do not believe in them. You are not Aven's messenger no matter what is said, you walk with death and you will destroy us all when you align with _Azkru Kwin_."

Clarke narrowed her eyes, "I'll never align with her, the reader was wrong."

"I was the reader and I know what I saw, you will align with her and you will destroy us." She twisted Clarke's hand and grabbed the knife with the other, holding it to her throat. "But claiming your blood before you can harm us will protect us."

A knock on the door made Clarke swallow, "do you want to risk someone witnessing you trying to kill me?"

"Tell them to go away."

* * *

The knock was persistent and before Clarke could answer the door opened to show Lexa. The woman's eyes narrowed and she instantly drew her knife, throwing it at Marta. Like with Quint, it landed in her wrist, allowing her to drop the knife.

" _Heda_ …"

Lexa was across the room and grabbing Marta by her cloak, pushing her into the wall. "You dare harm her? To harm her is to harm me, to attack her is to attack me."

"She thinks I'll align with _Azkru Kwin_." Clarke spoke as she neared the two.

"Voice of the gods or not, your blood will answer for what you have done." She looked to Clarke, "get the guards in the hallway."

"Okay." Clarke left the room and Lexa stared the woman in the eyes.

"She is my future _kwin_ , chosen by the gods and you attempted to take her life." Lexa hissed as Marta's eyes went wide. "You will undergo the entire death by a thousand cuts, not even Clarke's mercy could save you at this moment."

Clarke return with the guards and they filed into the room. " _Heda_?" One of the men looked at her and she pulled her knife from Marta's wrist, handing her off.

"Take her to the prison, she will suffer for her attempt on _Wanheda_."

The men dragged her away, Marta silently begged with her eyes to be spared but neither woman said anything. Clarke finally turned to Lexa and instantly the brunette raised a hand to Clarke's neck.

"I'm fine."

"She drew blood." Lexa looked to Clarke's eyes, "I have come to tell you that while the people celebrate, the marking will be done in private at the temple. I do not wish you to suffer Clarke and to take this mark, to become _Wanheda_ means that when we lead together against _Azkru Kwin_ one day, you shall command my army as if they were yours. You are equal to me, above all the clans and this will allow your people to trade with ease. The clans cannot deny you, they would not wish to."

Clarke let herself think about it, about how it would allow trade and her people would survive the coming winter. It would give her power in battle instead of relying solely on Lexa and most of all, it would give her the ability to challenge Lexa on everything without being punished for it. No one would be able to suffer if she did anything reckless, she'd be an official equal to the woman and nothing could be done to stop her.

"Let's go to the temple."

* * *

Pain radiated through Clarke's arm as the marker applied the marking that Maxim had designed. It was simpler than Lexa's but the pain was not something she was accustomed to. A band across her arm with circles, each containing a small asterisk while a second band underneath that one was pure black with lines falling underneath. The first band signified Aven's claim, he was god of the stars and always guided everything around them. The second was Jula's claim, the lines noting the many lives lost and those to come.

"You must breathe Clarke." Lexa spoke softly as she sat beside Clarke, the marker almost finished with the third of the fourth lines. "Once he is finished, you will receive a salve to calm the skin and take the pain away."

Clarke looked at the woman beside her, "how many do you have?"

"Many, one after every battle."

"After the Mountain?" Clarke asked and Lexa nodded, "can I see it?"

Lexa removed her jacket so her she only sat in her tank top, pulling the edge of the tank top down she showed the image that sat above her left breast. Clarke reached up with her free hand but dropped her hand before it touched Lexa's skin. It was a simple design of a four point star but flames surrounded the edges between the points. Lexa returned her tank top to the proper place and pulled her jacket on. "It was the most painful as every mark reminded me of my choice to leave you at the mountain."

"What does it mean?"

"It symbolizes the fight I endured beside _Skaikru_."

The marker pulled away from Clarke and she turned to see him dabbing at her arm with a cloth. For the first time she looked at her skin and the black ink that was permanent, the design was indeed beautiful. She looked to Lexa, "what do you think?"

"Unique and beautiful as the one it resides on."

Trigedasleng passed from the marker to Clarke but Lexa intercepted the comment. Clarke watched as Lexa spoke, her tone was more in reassurance than harshness. The man put the salve on Clarke's arm and instantly the blond felt relief from pain. "What did he say?"

"You are to keep your arm dry and clean for three days." She motioned to him so Clarke would see that he was wrapping her arm. "Treat it as you would a wound, as a healer you can do this with little effort."

"When can I go home?"

Lexa gave a soft smile, "I will take you tomorrow, it will be a two day journey as you are aware that it is a day's ride from Tondc."

" _Mochof_." Clarek spoke as the marker packed up his materials to leave. "And to you Maxim, for all your support."

* * *

A/N: This was a super long chapter but you saw alot of Clarke's inner thoughts and finally Marta was put in her place.

Next: Clarke returns home and to a few surprises.

Please read and review...


	8. The Start of a New Clarke

Hatred into Love

Spoilers: All Season 1 and Season 2 of the 100; Spoilers from San Diego Comic Con The 100 Panel

Disclaimer: I own nothing!

* * *

Returning to Tondc the evening after leaving Polis, Clarke found it was dark but a celebration was ongoing. What for she had no idea but apparently it had even Lexa confused, her eyes questioned everything as Indra met them at the tent that had been prepared before their arrival. Warriors took their horses and instead of a glare as was normal, Clarke found herself on the receiving end of a head bow from Indra. Her eyes resting on the blue cloak that held Aven's symbol along the edges, a gift from Maxim before Clarke left Polis.

" _Wanheda_ , welcome back to Tondc." Indra was polite and it threw Clarke but she merely nodded her head.

Lexa quickly shed her armor and sat on her throne, Clarke took a spot at the table as if it was a throne as well. "Speak of what has occurred since my departure last."

Indra moved to stand before her, "seconds have become warriors. A union has been proposed and is celebrated this night. The two will seek your blessing in the morning _Heda_."

"They shall have it."

"Octavia and Lincoln have returned, the girl carries a child and the _Skaikru_ have created misery for her since the finding."

Clarke's head went up, "I thought they were _natrona_?"

"I pardoned them during your absence." Lexa stated without looking up, "they are free to move once again on clan land without fear of capture or death."

"I'm going to go check on them." Clarke ignored her cloak and bag that sat on the table and headed out of the tent.

It was dark but she figured if the two were likely to be anywhere it would be at the celebration. Sensing something behind her, Clarke found Ryder a few feet behind her and all he did was nod at her. It figured that Lexa would sent a warrior to protect her but Ryder was familiar with Clarke, she knew he would stay at a distance so she didn't feel crowded. He was also aware not to piss her off if the past was anything to go by and after the incident with Octavia, he'd listened to her every word except about letting her horse go when she'd last been in Tondc.

" _Wanheda_ …" she noticed he held out her cloak, "the night is cold."

She took it and pulled it on, no doubt Lexa had handed it to him with the demand that he see that Clarke wear it. It was warm and Lexa had merely smiled at seeing her wear it, stating it matched her eyes. "Thanks, just do me a favor and keep back."

* * *

A nod was all she received as she started moving towards the celebration. It was just warriors around a campfire with several roasted boar on spicks and some drums that people were dancing to. She slipped in and sat down on one of the back logs, watching as one of the warriors tried to dance while balancing his sword on his head. Laughter and clapping ensued and she merely smiled, happy to see they were enjoying themselves.

The man's sword fell and he groaned, sitting down as Lincoln stood up and took it. "Let the fledgling try!" One of the warriors yelled and they all looked at Octavia, who sat with a cup halfway to her lips. "Come fledgling, can you dance or did you not learn when in the sky?"

"You can take that sword and shove it up your ass, I'm not doing anything but sitting here." She stated before taking a drink, laughter seemed to fill the group as they took in what she said.

"Leave her Mort, she deserves her rest." One of the older female warriors stated as she placed a hand on Octavia's shoulder. "I do not see any of you preparing to birth new life. She has a warrior growing under her heart, she requires rest for if the child is like Lincoln it will be a bear to birth!"

Laughter erupted yet again and Octavia merely rolled her eyes as Lincoln sat beside her. "This kid better not be as big as you or I'll hunt you down and kill you myself."

"I have no doubt."

* * *

Clarke sat watching but felt a hand on her arm and she turned to see one of the warriors she didn't know pull her up quickly. " _Klark kom Skaikru_ returns!"

Everyone around the fire turned and looked at her, she saw Octavia's eyes narrow at the sight of her. "I'm just watching, I don't mean any harm and only wish to rest." Clarke stated and pulled away as she saw Ryder move to intercept them. "I'm fine."

The warrior moved back and the others noticed him, the two that held her let her go as Ryder backed off. " _Heda_ protects her once again." One of the warriors stated and Clarke realized it was best she return to Lexa's tent until the general announcement was made at who she was. They didn't respect her as many others did, she thought her title was well known but perhaps knowing her, those in Tondc didn't care about it.

Turning she left with Ryder following behind her as she made her way back to Lexa's tent. The woman that had stated she'd been protected followed and she paused to look at the woman. "What do you want?"

"Go back to your people sky girl, your destruction of the mountain does not matter here. We know the truth, that you merely poisoned them all instead of claiming the blood we deserved. You stole our victory and…"

Ryder grabbed the warrior's arm, "watch your tongue."

"No, let her speak." Clarke put up a hand and he stepped back.

"Know this sky girl, there were others before you and they were dismissed quickly as you will be. I know this well so before your heart takes hold, know that you are one of many to come."

Clarke finally understood what the woman was saying, she'd been one of the many women who'd been in Lexa's bed but had been dismissed the next morning. She didn't know if it was a warning or a threat. "I assure you that's none of your concern."

"You will not sway _Heda_ and know if you attempt to overpower her I will slit your throat." A hand put up was all that stopped Ryder from moving to harm the woman.

"I'll take it under advisement."

* * *

Once she was back at the tent, Ryder left her and she removed the cloak once inside. Lexa was nowhere to be found in the outer area of the tent but as soon as she pushed back the curtain that separated the sleeping area she found Lexa resting on the bed. Green eyes opened and looked back at her, a soft smile on her face as she sat up.

"Did you enjoy your reunion with Octavia?"

Clarke sat on the end of the bed, she noticed that the bed that she had occupied days before had been removed. "One of your…conquests didn't give a chance. I left before anything could happen."

"My conquests?" There was general confusion written on her face so Clarke shrugged.

"One of the women you've invited to your furs for a night."

Lexa's jaw set and she looked to the side. "What was said?"

"The usual warning that I'll be quickly dismissed like she was, that you don't take lovers for long." Clarke leaned back against the furs while her legs hung off the bed, "that and she was really pissed I just irradiated the mountain instead of slitting all their throats. Apparently I stole their victory."

"Her words are untrue." Lexa stated softly as her gaze returned to Clarke, she found Lexa giving her a soft look unlike the fire that had been there before. "My regards towards you have not changed Clarke nor will they. You are my equal, _Wanheda_ to the clans and all should respect you. There was no victory at the mountain, only death to provide safety."

She was about to speak when a yawn forced itself forward. "Sorry…"

"Do not apologize, you are tired and require rest." Lexa rose from the bed and motioned to it. "Rest Clarke, we will return you to your people in the morning."

Clarke allowed herself to maneuver until she lay fully against the bed. "Sorry I'm taking your bed."

"The bear fur I have will give me comfort on the ground, it is softer than most furs." Lexa's voice lulled Clarke as her eyes drooped, allowing her to rest after a long day. She felt a hand on her head and opened her eyes to see Lexa gazing down at her with a softened expression, something she dared not name lay in those green eyes as they gazed down at her. "Rest _ai kwin._ " Before she could comment on the name Lexa was gone and she figured she could discuss it with her on the ride to Camp Jaha.

* * *

The next morning she woke to the sound of Lexa's rapid Trigedasleng, clearly she was mad and the speed alone meant Clarke wouldn't understand it. Getting out of bed, she stepped around the bear fur that rested on the ground, picking it up briefly to place it on the bed so it wouldn't get dirtied. Pushing the curtain aside she saw the woman who had confronted her the night before standing before Lexa as the leader sat on her throne. The woman's eyes shifted over to her for a moment as did Lexa's but she said nothing as Clarke sat at the table.

"You will watch your tongue in the future or I shall have it cut out." Lexa rose and the woman bowed her head before leaving the tent.

"What did you say to her?" Clarke asked softly as Lexa poured a cup of water.

Lexa looked up at her, "this once Clarke I ask that you do not question me. I often give you explanation of my actions when I need not and I share burdens and rulings with you but this once you will not know my words or my actions. Can you accept that?"

She put up both her hands as if backing off, "your business, I understand."

"The announcement has already been made, the village priest has already informed all who you are and that you were chosen by not one but two gods. They will not speak to you as you were spoken to last night and there is little doubt all those here would protect you as Ryder or those assigned by me do."

"You didn't have to do this, I don't want them forced to like me."

Lexa moved to her and brushed back a strand of blond hair that had fallen into her eyes. "There is no force Clarke, they simply misunderstood your actions. They believed that you destroyed the mountain out of revenge, keeping a victory from them but they now know the gods sent you to do what was done. You carried Aven's message and Jula's punishment for their actions against the clans."

Clarke saw Lexa's eyes, still soft like the night before she she called her 'my queen'. Her anger still lay below the surface but forgiveness was growing against it, she looked at Lexa and often felt only a mixture of attraction and understanding of actions. Her eyes slipped the leader's lips for what had to be the billionth time since they'd been in Polis but instead of backing up like always she saw Lexa's eyes show recognition. The warrior leaned in and kissed her, her hand growing warm against Clarke's side as she gently increased pressure.

Hands gripped the woman's elbows as she fell into it, her anger and forgiveness forgotten in that moment. Lexa parted from her but brushed a kiss against the edge of her mouth and then her cheek before brushing against her ear. "Your anger calms knowing your actions are right despite the pain they caused. I am glad Clarke that your anger no longer consumes you when you look upon me."

That made her anger flare and she pulled back, her hand flashing up and across the woman's face before she had a chance to regret her actions. Clarke glared at the woman as Lexa recovered from being slapped across the cheek. "Don't you ever try to seduce me just to tell me I've done what you wanted. I'm never going to get over my anger, your actions caused all this to happen." She leaned in closer, "and don't ever call me your queen again, I'm not yours and I won't ever be. Remember Lexa, you are _Heda_ and that means you only get your people."

It was spiteful and she saw the hurt-filled green eyes as she spoke but Clarke left the tent without another word. Anger filled her as she moved through the camp to her horse, she'd be returning home without an escort and definitely without Lexa. She didn't want anything the woman had to offer and every time there was a moment between them, the leader had to go and ruin it by stating something that would anger Clarke.

She didn't bother looking for anyone as she found the black mare and surprisingly nobody tried to stop her. She was thankful that she knew the way from Tondc to Camp Jaha. She'd ridden it many times during the war and knew the way, it was her territory unlike the village she'd been in after Roan had captured her. Clarke didn't look back as she urged her horse into the trees, riding the familiar path that would lead her home. It slipped into her thoughts of whether they would shoot at her like they had when she arrived after escaping the mountain or if they'd know who she was immediately upon arrival. Without her cloak she was dressed in only black pants and a black tank top as she hadn't paused to dress in further clothing before storming from the tent.

* * *

Night fell as she approached the camp, she slowed her horse and waited as the spot light was shone in her direction. Immediately yells were called out and Clarke steadied the horse, putting her hand to the mare's neck. "Easy Steltrona, easy."

The gate opened immediately as she eased from the horse, she saw her mother and Kane making their way over as did Bellamy and Raven. Before she could speak her mother gasped and pulled her into a tight hug, holding her to the point she felt like she couldn't breathe. "You're home."

"Yeah I came back." It occurred to Clarke that there hadn't been a place she could call home since she arrived on the ground.

"Where have you been?"

Clarke shrugged, "the forest, the edge of the Ice Nation, Polis and Tondc. You know, around."

Raven grabbed her arm and stared at the tattoo, "gone full grounder more like, what does this mean?"

"A lot more than I want it to." Clarke pulled away and steadied the horse as one of the guards tried to take it. "I just want to rest, I've been in villages and cities for the past week and a half."

Kane nodded, "welcome back Clarke."

Bellamy smiled at her before hugging her, "welcome back."

"I thought you'd be pissed."

He chuckled, "I was until someone told me that there are some battles better fought silently than with rage."

"Whoever they are I'd like to meet them."

"You can, come on." He motioned for her to walk ahead of him. "So full grounder huh?" He motioned to her tattoo.

" _Shof op!_ "

* * *

A/N: I know this is short but the next chapter will be longer.

Next: Clarke finds herself trying to adjust to the Ark but finds that it's hard to live by rules when she's been without them for so long.

Please read and review...

 **Thanks to everyone who has been super patient, I just finished my biochemistry and organic chemistry courses during summer university semester. I didn't have a lot of time to write but when I did, you were very patient and supportive.**


	9. Suffocation and Freedom

Hatred into Love

Spoilers: All Season 1 and Season 2 of the 100; Spoilers from San Diego Comic Con The 100 Panel

Disclaimer: I own nothing!

* * *

For the fourth day since her arrival back, Clarke found herself in the Infirmary tending to minor wounds and taking stock of medical supplies. The day after her arrival she'd been woken at dawn by her mother, given a meal and then assigned a job in the Infirmary. There was no freedom in her movements, nothing but commands and orders. It was suffocating and she wanted nothing more than to just be free to ride her horse through the woods for a few hours. At dinner her mother came to get her and they walked together to the dining hall.

The crash of the Ark made things different from when it was in the sky. Instead of going from one area to the other inside, the infirmary had no interior door so she had to walk outside before going to another door to go inside. She walked with her mother, the woman trying to engage her but she was silent. She'd grown so used to silence among the Grounders, even as much as Lexa spoke to her it was still so little. The thought of the woman filled her with both longing and anger but she refused to show anything on her face.

"I think the kids are having a bonfire tonight, you should go." Abby spoke to her and she nodded, rubbing her arms as she did. "Are you okay Clarke?"

"Fine, thanks for asking." She accepted the tray that one of the Arkers gave her when she got to the dining hall. She found a chair at the table where Bellamy and Raven sat, she said nothing just as they said nothing.

After a while she looked up when some of the armed guards entered the dining hall, they spoke to Abby and she knew something was up when her mother looked over at her quickly. Clarke looked at Bellamy and he seemed to get the idea that something was up as well and they both stood to walk over to Abby but the woman left. They just followed her, not saying anything because they'd both learned that words weren't needed on the ground in some instances.

* * *

Outside she found her mother and Kane climbing the watch tower, she moved to the wire fencing and looked out. Bellamy stood beside her, they both saw the white horse at the end of the forest as the sun began to set. It wasn't hard to make out the white horse among the trees and Clarke knew instantly it was Lexa's horse. She was the only one allowed a white horse, beside Clarke herself but the blond was happy with Steltrona.

"The Commander, last time she was here she was attempting to trade with Abby. It ended up in a shouting match, at least your mother was shouting at her."

Clarke nodded, "my mother doesn't understand the ground."

"None of them do but they're learning, even if it may kill them before they completely understand." Bellamy put a hand to her arm and they watched as the white horse and rider got closer. As Clarke expected, several other horses emerged from the trees and were behind Lexa, guarding her no doubt.

She moved over to the gate and looked up at her mother, apparently the doctor understood and signaled for the gate to open. Clarke slipped through and Bellamy wasn't far behind her but she turned to look at Bellamy a few feet from the gate. "Stay here."

"Clarke…"

"It's okay."

* * *

She walked about twenty yards before stopping and Lexa paused her horse, slipping from it as one of the warriors took the reins. The woman removed a bag from her saddle and walked till she stood just a few feet from Clarke. They stared at each other for what seemed like hours but was only minutes. Clarke analyzed the green eyes that looked at her softly, she saw relief but also a hint of the same emotion she'd seen days earlier that she dare not name.

"I see you are well," Lexa looked down at the bag in her hands. "I came to give you the belongings that you forgot when you left." Looking up the woman held it out and Clarke took it from her.

" _Mochof_." Clarke looked back at the camp to see Bellamy and her mother waiting outside the gate, both seeming to try to understand from the distance what was going on. She turned back to look at Lexa. "Look, I shouldn't have slapped you and I'm sorry."

Lexa gave a nod, "I was wrong to speak when I did. Allow me to restore peace between us by inviting you to Tondc for the union between two warriors. You have never witnessed a union but I assure you that you would enjoy it."

"Is there killing?"

"Some." She watched Clarke's face fall. "Only the animals that we eat, although there are injuries when the family of the intended determines if her _houmon_ is worthy."

Clarke chuckled and looked to the side, Lexa's sense of humor reminded her of softer times in Polis. "I need to get away, there's too many rules and I'm about ready to run off with Steltrona just to escape."

"If your people are making you wish to escape then you will find sanctuary with me whenever necessary." Lexa smiled at her softly and reached out to run a finger across Clarke's cheek. "I shall leave Ryder at the tree line, if you wish to come then he will accompany you to the village."

Blue eyes looked up at her Clarke nodded as Lexa dropped her hand. "Can I bring my friends?"

"You are _Wanheda_ , you may do as you like." Lexa merely pulled a knife from her boot and flipped it in her hand before handing it to Clarke. "Carry this with you always until you are taught a weapon besides your guns."

"And if I don't?"

Lexa gave a very soft chuckle, "I shall keep you in Polis where you are safe from enemies."

"Sounds like a threat." Clarke took the knife and put it in her boot.

"A promise." The brunette gave a soft smile before looking over Clarke's shoulder at Bellamy and Abby. "Tell your general that he neglects his lover, I had to order her to remain behind as she wished to come. He would do well to visit her soon before she comes unannounced."

"Lover?"

Lexa nodded, "Octavia is not the only _Skaikru_ to find their _houmon_ on the ground." She backed up a foot before meeting blue eyes. "I shall see you soon _ai kwin_."

She grabbed the reins and mounted her horse before turning it away. "I told you not to call me that!" Lexa merely looked back at her, a quirk of her lips was the equivalent of a smirk. Her eyes were filled with pride and laughter as she turned back around, urging her horse forward towards the tree line.

* * *

Pulling the bag on her back, she walked back to the gate to find Bellamy with his arms crossed and her mother's look of expectation. Apparently the woman expected answers to what was said in the exchange. As she neared Bellamy turned to walk beside her and her mother walked on her other side as they entered the gate.

"What did she want?"

"To return the stuff I left in the village, extended an invitation to me and a few of the hundred to visit for a wedding celebration." Clarke paused and punched his arm, "and for me to tell you that your _houmon_ has made multiple attempts to come here and you better go visit her soon. Since when did you find a grounder to fall in love with?"

Bellamy rubbed the back of his neck, "we met in Mount Weather, she helped me kill a guard."

"Uh huh, what clan is she from?"

"Ice Nation but she's sworn loyalty to the Commander." He looked at Clarke, "that's beside the point. What is important is what was that back there?" He motioned towards the gate, "I actually saw her smile, I didn't think she could and she caressed your face Clarke. Is there something we should know? Are you and the Commander together?"

Clarke snorted, "the closest we get is when we're physically fighting and when I say that, I mean we're throwing punches. Besides, as _Heda_ she took a vow to put her people first and that means she can't have a lover or a _houmon_."

"No wonder she has a stick up her ass." The voice was Raven's and Clarke turned to see the woman standing a few feet away. Apparently she'd joined the party a few seconds before, "I mean that's one hell of a dry spell. You'd think they'd let her at least have something every once and while, it's not like she's in low supply of warriors. Hell, she's hot and if it would make her stop shoving a sword at us every day then I'd do her. We're not exactly her clan so it wouldn't be breaking rules, right?"

The blond shook her head and walked past Raven before bending close to the woman to whisper in her ear. "She has a preference for blonds, I know from experience." With that Clarke pulled back and watched Raven's eyes go wide. " _Shof op_."

"Seriously?" Clarke merely just walked away, "Clarke you can't give me that type of information and just walk away. I mean that is…wow!"

"So are we going to the wedding?" Bellamy called out and Clarke turned to look at him. "I'd like to go see my girlfriend and it's a perfect reason."

Clarke shrugged, "be ready by the morning."

"Wedding? I'm up for a wedding!" Raven looked hyped at the idea. "I mean, I'm sure the Grounders are party animals if they enjoy war celebrations as much as they do."

* * *

Abby finally interjected, "no one is going to the wedding until I discuss with Clarke what it intels."

Clarke moved to Abby, "it's a wedding, an invitation was given for the hundred to enjoy mingling with the Tondc population as a sign of peace. _Heda_ wouldn't have extended the offer if there were any ill intentions."

"Clarke there are always ulterior motives with that woman…"

The blond took a breath, "not this time, I may not like her actions at times but I know her. She will do what's best for her people and the best thing right now is peace." She also looked to the side before looking back at her mother. "She also knows not to piss me off because it takes twice as long for me to talk to her civilly again."

"Why does that matter?"

Clarke snorted, "because she's in love with me and wants our friendship just about as much as she wants her people safe."

It was hard to acknowledge to her mother just as much as it was hard to acknowledge it to herself. She'd seen the look in Lexa's eyes and knew what it was but she didn't want to name it. However if she ever wanted her mother to understand that Lexa wasn't a threat, she had no choice but to reveal the truth. The truth was that the mighty _Heda_ of the clans was in love with a girl that fell from the sky and tore apart her entire world.

Bellamy and Raven seemed to fall silent at that as did Abby, Clarke watched her mother soak in the information she'd just given. "She's in love with you? How can that be? It doesn't make sense, you're…"

"I'm me, I know it doesn't make sense but she's in love with _Klark kom Skaikru_ , the girl that fell from the sky." Clarke shook her head, "at this point it's the only thing I can use to ensure peace between our people and hers so I let it go."

Abby nodded, "you're sure she isn't doing this with an ulterior motive?"

"Yes and you can come along if you'd like to witness what I'm saying is true."

Raven finally spoke again, "so we're going?"

"Yes." Clarke looked at the girl. "Monty, Wick, Jasper and Monroe are welcome if they want."

"Jasper is going to be a no but the rest maybe."

Abby narrowed her eyes, "Wick isn't one of the hundred."

"He's Raven's _houmon_ , he's allowed to come."

The good doctor finally put her hand up in the air, "English, Octavia and Lincoln threw too much Grounder at us and we still didn't understand and now you are."

"Technically it's called Trigedasleng and _houmon_ means spouse but in this context I mean boyfriend. Grounders generally stick with someone once they form a relationship until death or the person is killed." Clarke had learned pretty quickly that relationships weren't fleeting like they were on the Ark. Lexa's nightly conquests were normal for her status as _Heda_ but mostly once a relationship was formed, it was permanent until death.

* * *

Ryder was waiting for them the next morning at the tree line, he gave her a soft smile and clasped her arm in his own. Clarke smiled at him from where she sat on Steltrona, the others were on foot but once seeing Raven the warrior offered his horse.

"Take the horse Raven of the Sky People, a warrior should never be dishonored by being made to walk on the injury that gained her a victory."

Wick picked her up and put her on the horse before she could say anything. "Hold on tight so you don't fall." He looked up at her and patted her leg, "you okay?"

"Yeah I'm good." Raven grinned and she leaned forward to pet the animal's neck. "I'm actually on a horse."

Clarke looked at Ryder as they began the journey, "I want ten horses brought to the camp before the next full moon. _Skaikru_ need access to faster movement than walking, especially if need arises."

"You can't demand that Clarke!" Abby stated but she dismissed her mother with a look.

"I shall the traders what you wish." Ryder gave her a nod and she gave one in return.

Abby looked at Ryder as they walked, "what do they expect in return for the horses?"

The warrior looked back at Abby, "what _Wanheda_ demands, she shall have. Only your people must trade in return, she shall be given what she wishes as she is equal to _Heda_."

" _Wanheda?_ "

"It means Commander of Death, it's the title they gave me after the mountain." Clarke spoke softly and gave Ryder a glare, the warrior was smart enough to keep his mouth shut about anything relating to the subject.

Raven looked over at Clarke, "any chance they have locations to bunkers that we can raid?"

"What do you need exactly?" Clarke looked over at her friend.

"Metals, wiring and pipes. We're trying to get the water fully restored but we're low on piping."

"Polis has running water so they likely have piping." Clarke looked down at Ryder, "I'll have list of items for you by the time we leave after the union celebration."

" _Sha Wanheda_."

Clarke reached down and touched his shoulder, "you can call me Clarke, after all you are my personal guard."

" _Heda_ knows you prefer me to Nox."

She scrunched her face slightly, "he looks like he wants to take me to his tent every time I see him."

"I believe that is why _Heda_ assigned him to the boundary patrol." Ryder gave a soft chuckle and Clarke smirked. " _Heda_ has prepared a tent for you and your people. I believe she has sacrificed her good bear fur for your comfort."

"Well she can take her bear fur and shove it up her ass, I much prefer the wolf fur."

"I will allow you to tell _Heda_ such." Ryder looked up at Clarke, "I prefer to keep my tongue."

Clarke was silent for a while before she spoke, "how is your _houmon_? Has he returned from his patrol of the southern boundary?"

" _Sha_ and he does not believe I personally guard _Wanheda_ , he believes I lie to him but when he sees you I shall win the wager we have." He looked up to meet her eyes with a smirk on his face. "We shall take a daughter instead of a son when we next go to Polis."

That had the blond chuckling, "well I want to meet this young girl you're adopting."

"I shall bring her to your camp so she may see the _Skaikru_ with her own eyes and know they are allies of her clan."

* * *

They reached the village past nightfall but Indra seemed to be waiting, she gave Clarke a nod of respect as her horse was taken by one of the warriors. Clarke gave her a nod in return before heading towards Lexa's tent, Indra stopped her friends and guided them towards another tent not far away from the one at the center of the camp. Clarke turned at the entrance of the tent to see her mother watching her as the woman walked with Indra.

Slipping past the guards, who had learned not to stop her, she found Lexa standing in her tank top and leggings. She was surveying maps that lay on her table and didn't bother looking up as she spoke softly. "Clarke of the Sky People has honored us with her presence."

" _Shof op!_ " Clarke made her way towards the table and paused behind Lexa. "Why are you still looking at maps? We aren't at war anymore."

Lexa turned to look at Clarke and allowed her green eyes to soak in the blue that were soft in the fire light. "I am deciding where to play the boundary between our lands."

"That should be a joint decision made by both of us."

"I have not decided where it will go yet Clarke, do not assume I make this decision alone." She turned towards the maps but a hand on her arm twisted her till her back was against the table and the blond was kissing her.

Clarke ran her hands under the tank top that Lexa wore, her hands finding soft skin and firm muscle. The feeling of kill marks on Lexa's side made her fingers pause to examine as her lips pressed harden into the soft flesh of Lexa's mouth. She pulled away suddenly and looked into the green eyes that gazed at her softly, a small whimper having escaped the brunette that was inches from her. "Consider that punishment."

She moved away and Lexa stood there breathing, her chin against her chest as she caught her breath. "For what?"

"Calling me your queen again." Clarke took the maps from her and moved feet away to survey them. "The river can be our boundary, shared by both our people."

"As you wish." Lexa moved towards her private area, pausing only to look at Clarke with expectant eyes.

* * *

The blond put down the maps and moved past Lexa, sitting on the soft fur of her bed. The wolf pelt she preferred lay on the bed and she ran her fingers through it. "I want this fur, I prefer it to the bear."

Lexa sat on the bed and nodded, "I shall have one similar delivered to your tent."

"I am supplying a list to Ryder before we leave, it has things we need from Polis. So the traders will be bringing me supplies as well on the next trade."

"Whatever you require you shall have, it is your right as _Wanheda_." Lexa moved till she sat behind Clarke and reached up to touch the blond strands of hair. "I am going to braid your hair, only part as I notice you prefer it free."

Clarke watched her rise from the bed and moved to grab a box that lay on the small table nearby. Once the box was in hand, Lexa sat behind her with her legs on either side of her body. "How long is the union celebration?"

"Days and nights, it depends on how long those uniting wish it to be." Lexa began running a comb through the blond locks in her hand. "Some wish only a single day and night while others wish several. If a warrior's family is in another village it is usually longer so the family can enjoy their time together."

"My mother came, she pulled her weight as Chancellor and wouldn't let us come if she didn't come as well."

Lexa placed the box in Clarke's lap, opening it to remove a tiny band of cloth that was blue in color. "Your mother does not understand our ways and must be cautioned to watch her tongue while she is here."

"I'll tell her but I think you've gotten an idea of how stubborn she can be."

"I often want to remove her tongue." Lexa reached down to squeeze Clarke's arm. "However I do not as she is your mother and I would only anger you further."

Clarke looked down to see Lexa reaching for another tiny blue band. "What are you doing with those?"

"They are to assist in the design of your braid, all _Heda_ have braids far different from those of warriors. Our status allows for more complex design and I use blue to match your eyes and cloak."

* * *

An hour must have passed by the time Lexa finished and Clarke laid down against the wolf pelt when Lexa went to put the box away. She closed her eyes and ignored the urge to return to the tent her people were in, the idea that a short nap would be okay. A hand went to her head and threaded through the loose locks of hair as a weight dipped the bed. Clarke felt Lexa sit beside her and said nothing as the leader continued to run her fingers through the loose golden strands.

"Rest _ai kwin_ , I shall wake you when your people need you." It was soft and Clarke filed away the name in order to remember to retaliate at a later time.

Lexa watched Clarke fall asleep and leaned down to kiss her head, allowing herself to take in the soft features that she hadn't seen since the evening before Clarke had left her days before. The sound of Indra's sharp commands beyond the tent made her rise gently and quietly so not to wake Clarke. She removed the second wolf pelt she had from a small basket and laid it across the blond before moving to see what the issue was beyond the tent.

She found Abby getting into an argument with Indra and her presence immediately had both women turning to see her. Abby moved towards her, "where is Clarke?"

"Resting as you should, it is late and the morning will be heavy with celebration."

"I want to see her, now Commander!"

Lexa nodded, "only if you are quiet and do not wake her. Can you do so or do you wish to stand out here all night to wait till morning?"

"Fine, I'll be quiet but I want to see my daughter now."

Without further words the leader lead the woman to see her daughter, she moved into the tent and over to the curtain. Pushing it aside she showed Abby the sleeping blond, Clarke was curled up on her side with the wolf pelt over her. Her face was peaceful and her sleep undisturbed, clearly in the land of dreams. She let the curtain fall and nodded her head to the door, waiting till Abby made her way out of the tent to follow. Once outside she turned to the woman who always wished to question her.

"Contrary to what you believe Abby of the Sky People, Clarke is in no danger. My actions during war are not my actions during peace, during war I do what is best for my people no matter the cost. Peace allows me to no longer sacrifice alliances and make deals to harm, all prosper and are protected during peace."

Abby nodded, "I'll be here in the morning to wake Clarke."

"You will wait until Clarke comes to you. You will learn quickly that your daughter is not your daughter when among my people, she is a leader. She does not answer to no one other than herself, not even I am allowed to command her."

"Clearly you do."

Lexa quirked the corner of her lips, "you do not know your daughter if you believe that. No one commands Clarke, no one demands of her because I would fear for those who try." She turned towards her tent, "sleep well Abby of the Sky People."

Once inside her tent she tucked the wolf pelt around Clarke's back before laying down on the bed. Closing her eyes, Lexa rested her arms on her belly and allowed sleep to claim her. Just as she felt the darkness of sleep encompass her mind fully, she felt Clarke's forehead against her shoulder and an arm across her own. Turning her head towards the woman beside her, Lexa gasped the arm across her with her hand and allowed sleep to fully take her.

* * *

A/N: Forgiveness takes time especially when falling in love.

Next: Clarke and the others attend the union celebration as well as meet up with Bellamy's girl friend and Lincoln and Octavia.

Please read and review...


	10. Calm Before the Storm

Hatred into Love

Spoilers: All Season 1 and Season 2 of the 100; Spoilers from San Diego Comic Con The 100 Panel

Disclaimer: I own nothing!

* * *

Clarke woke to the sounds of Trigedasleng being spoken loudly, commands being thrown around but despite the noise outside the tent she focused on the soft breaths beside her. Opening her eyes she pulled back to see Lexa resting beside her, soft breaths causing the woman's chest to rise and fall gently. Clarke looked at her hand to see it sandwiched between Lexa's arm and wrist, the woman's grip on her own wrist light and soft. She took a minute to look at Lexa, the calmness of her face was rare to see and not for the first time the blond found herself driven towards lust at the beauty the woman held.

"Starring is considered rude." Lexa's voice was soft as she turned her head and opened her eyes to look at Clarke. A quirk of her lips told the blond that she was more amused than angered. "Did you sleep well Clarke?"

The blond groaned as she snuggled back into the fur, putting her forehead back against Lexa's arms. "Sleep more…"

A soft chuckle escaped the brunette as she let go of Clarke's wrist and sat up gently, "rest _ai kwin_ and I shall wake you when necessary." Clarke felt the back of Lexa's fingers run against her cheek.

"Not your queen." It was mumbled but Lexa leaned down to kiss the edge of Clarke's mouth.

"Your people mock you and call you princess but they are wrong to call you such. You are no princess, you are a queen chosen by the gods." Lexa rose and pulled the fur up to Clarke's shoulder. "You may not be mine but you are a queen and thus is why I call you such."

* * *

Lexa walked through the village after dressing and saw that daily life continued. Training warriors fought in the small arena, women returned from the stream with the washing and the smoke hut was in full production. The union would occur at midday and life continued until that point, when the village would celebrate in the aftermath. Indra stood watching the training and she quickly took her place beside the woman, nodding to Octavia as the girl stood beside Indra. It wasn't hard to see the difference the child in her was making, her face had some fullness and she no longer wore the tight clothes of a warrior, her top a loose black material that would allow for the growth of the child.

"Your people arrived during the night Octavia, your brother among them." She looked to the girl as girl watched the training. "Perhaps you would prefer to sit with them during the union celebrations."

Octavia looked to her and nodded, " _mochof Heda_."

"Abby of the Sky People has inquired of _Wanheda_ repeatedly through the morning." Indra spoke gruffly, clearly unamused with Abby's actions.

" _Wanheda_ rests, her people command her actions and do not give her freedom she requires. During her time here she will be who she is, answering to none."

Octavia yelled at one of the warriors, clearly unamused with his tactics as he fell to the ground like a child. Lexa found herself amused that the young fledgling warrior would berate those who'd been in battle longer because they abandoned common sense. She suspected the child below the girl's heart gave her the boldness to do so when she wouldn't have dared before. Birthing a warrior would cement her within their clan, she'd be honored like all other mothers who birthed children to warriors of status.

"Commander!" Lexa suppressed the urge to roll her eyes when she heard Abby yelling for her as the woman walked towards the training arena.

She turned to look at the woman, "Abby of the Sky People, I assume you slept well? I had my best furs given to your people so you would be comfortable."

"Where is my daughter, Indra refuses to tell me anything."

"She still rests."

Abby fixed her jaw, "she should have been up at sunrise, she can't sleep forever."

"She sleeps as long as she sleeps." Lexa turned back to Indra and nodded to her before turning away and walking towards her tent.

Abby caught up with her and grabbed her arm, she stopped and stared at the hand that grasped her. The woman before her seemed to understand and dropped her hand, "either you wake her Commander or I will."

"You do not make demands in my village Abby, I am tolerant of you for Clarke's sake but do not mistake my tolerance for acceptance. You are a guest here and you will behave accordingly or you will be escorted back to your camp." With that she moved into the tent with a single look at the guard at the door, he gave a subtle not to understand that Abby wasn't to follow her in.

* * *

Clarke woke to a hand on her shoulder and opened her eyes to see Lexa sitting beside her in her light armor. She blinked before sitting up slowly, yawning into her hand as she did. Lexa said nothing as she slipped behind the blond to fix the braids that had loosened. Allowing the brunette to fix her hair, Clarke took a few minutes to allow herself to wake up.

"What time is it?"

"The sun is midway between rising and full height, I only wake you because your mother makes demands of me and I tire of her." Lexa removed her hands from the blond strands and stood up beside the bed. "If you do not speak with her I will have no choice but to take her tongue as she borders on insolence."

The blond groaned and looked up at the woman beside her, "that's one way to wake someone up. Threatening to take their mother's tongue will definitely get them out of bed." She put her feet on the floor of the tent and stood up. "Good morning to you too."

Lexa gave a soft smile and leaned in to kiss the corner of Clarke's mouth. "Good morning." She pulled away and moved towards the central part of the tent. "I shall have a bath drawn for you if you would like?"

"No, I'll just go to the river. Ryder knows to keep his distance and besides, I need the cold water to fully wake me up so I can deal with my mother."

"As you wish." Lexa merely went back to her maps and Clarke disappeared out of the tent to find her belongings so she could go to the river to bathe.

* * *

Clarke found Raven and Wick in the tent with Bellamy and a brunette woman. They were all speaking as the brunette applied ink to Raven's arm, it was the temporary type used in celebrations or so Lexa told her the night before. It was common for the women of the clan to apply temporary ink to their arms and face before celebrations. She walked past them till she reached the empty bed that held the bear fur she knew was Lexa's, on top of the fur was her bag. Grabbing it she started out of the tent but was quickly called back by Raven.

"Hey Clarke, you should see what Echo did to my arm."

Clarke turned around and headed back over, looking at the flames that danced up Raven's arms from her elbows. "That's impressive."

The brunette woman stood and nodded her head to Clarke. "It is an honor to meet you _Wanheda_ , I am Echo of the Ice Nation."

"Bellamy's told me a lot about you, thank you for your help at the mountain."

Echo took a step towards her and lowered her head, "know I wish you no harm, I am not like my people who want your head."

"Actually I think your queen wants my head not your people." Clarke looked at her and saw all three behind her go wide-eyed. "We'll talk later, I'm heading to the river to bathe."

Raven stood up, "my leg could use a good soak."

"I will have to reapply the ink if water touches it before it dries." Echo stated and Raven waved her off.

"You should come too, all of us girls could use some time away from the guys." Raven looked at Echo, "besides, Bellamy hasn't seen you after a bath so he might appreciate it more."

Bellamy rolled his eyes and moved over to Echo, touching her arm. "Ignore Raven, I'll take you bath or no bath."

"Of course you would." Raven smirked, "you're so love struck with her it makes you seem pathetic."

Echo looked at Clarke, "if you do not mind _Wanheda_ , may we join you?"

"If you don't mind my guard hanging back at the tree line and before you ask Raven, it's Ryder."

"He seems cool and besides," she motioned to her body, "it's not like I don't have anything he probably hasn't seen before since modesty seems to not be a high priority in Grounder culture."

Bellamy shook his head, "just don't proposition him like you attempted to with the Commander."

Echo turned sharply, "you offered yourself to _Heda_?"

"I just said I'd do her, I didn't actually offer." Raven shrugged, "she's hot and she probably would be fun in bed."

Clarke chuckled and smirked slightly, "I'd actually like to see what she has to say if you did offer yourself."

* * *

The river was beautiful and calm, Clarke set her bag down on a nearby rock and started to shed her clothes. She didn't bother with modesty as the only ones there were Raven, Echo and Octavia, the fledgling warrior had caught them heading out of the camp with Ryder and wordlessly joined their little outing. The sound of Raven shrieking at the cold water made all three of them laugh.

"That's freezing!"

Echo swam in the water and looked at the mechanic, "the waters in my clan's land are twice as cold as the ones we are in. To me the water is rather warm and enjoyable."

Clarke slipped into the water but was careful of her hair, she'd tied it up before she'd gotten in the river. Octavia sat on the river bank, clearly not interested at getting in the water at that point. She sharpened her sword instead with the black stone that most of the warriors used to sharpen all their blades. Swimming to the edge of the river, Clarke looked at Octavia and was met by softer eyes then had been present days before.

"Hey, I heard you and Lincoln are expecting a baby."

Octavia nodded, "I'm almost four months, post-battle celebration baby."

Clarke smiled at her, "I'm happy for you two, you deserve to have a family and be happy."

The warrior put her stuff down and bit her lip before speaking. "I was pissed at you for what you did but I finally see the bigger picture Clarke, knowing what you did in the mountain. I'm sorry I didn't see it before." She sheathed her sword and smirked, "I'm not going to just act like everyone else and think of you as some chosen leader."

"Good, I don't want you too." Clarke sighed and shrugged, "I mean I have an entire clan doing it already, I don't want my friends doing it too."

She leaned forward slightly and examined Clarke's tattoo, "did that hurt?"

"I'm pretty sure you'd be able to handle a tattoo." She nodded to Octavia's leg, "especially after everything you've endured with that leg."

"I've been thinking of it, Lincoln and Indra won't let me get kill marks so I was thinking of getting a small tattooed mark for each kill."

* * *

Clarke turned at another shriek from Raven and saw Echo bush her down, clearly Raven had thrown water at the warrior as her previously dry hair was soaked. Eventually Echo let Raven go and the woman sputtered as she looked angry as ever. Swimming over, Clarke was thankful the river wasn't deep as she'd accepted she'd have to swim when she'd been in Osa's village. She'd been taken to the river and the woman had practically pushed her in when she hadn't wanted to get in, Clarke had needed a bath badly and all around her knew it at the time.

"Who did your braids?" Echo asked curiously, seeing Clarke's braid as she swam around to prevent a war between the warrior and Raven.

"What's wrong with my braids?" Clarke got the idea that Echo brought the question up as a serious topic not as a compliment, the woman's tone and eyes were enough of an indication.

Echo merely looked at her, "the designs are one of _Kwin_ not _Heda_. Your braids should fall in the direction of the ground not circle your head as if you are wearing a crown. Whoever did them does not see you as _Wanheda_ but as a _kwin_ , a dangerous act because to be named _kwin_ is to put you above _Heda_."

Clarke had to hold her tongue as she wanted to tell Echo not to worry, that Lexa did them but something told her that would create more chaos than normal. Instead she realized that she should speak to the woman who'd shared her bed the night before she turns the village and clans upside down. Lexa calling her ' _kwin_ ' in the privacy of the tent was one thing but announcing to the entire clan her intent to break her vows again, especially for a sky girl, was extremely dangerous. As often as she was angry with Lexa, she cared very much for the woman and didn't want her uprooting her entire clan and possibly endangering her life.

"I'll take care of it, I don't want the village in chaos over something as simple as my braids."

Echo nodded, "let me know if you require the application of force for the one guilty."

* * *

A sharp whistle made Clarke look over to see Ryder standing a few feet from the shore. Keeping herself under the water, Clarke made her way over and looked at the man. "What's wrong Ryder?"

"The trades from the east have arrived and with them the leader of the Boat People. _Heda_ states she is eager to meet you and reminds you diplomacy does not always allow time for one's self."

Clarke narrowed her eyes, "tell the messenger to tell _Heda_ that she can take her lessons and shove them up her ass. I'll be there when I get done, no sooner."

Ryder nodded, "I shall inform _Heda_ that you will arrive when you are finished." He turned quickly and Clarke knew most of her messages were reworded so Ryder didn't find himself on Lexa's wrong side.

Octavia chuckled and smirked slightly as Clarke looked over at her. "I get the idea that he often only relays half your messages because he'd loose his tongue if he actually said what you asked him to."

" _Shof op!_ " Clarke splashed water at Octavia and the girl moved back before the water hit her.

* * *

Clarke wore her blue dress, cloak and had allowed her hair to fall as it had been when she'd woken up. Walking into the camp, she received more nods than she wanted but she said nothing and was thankful no one bowed to her like they did occasionally with Lexa. Walking towards Lexa's tent, she left the three other girls to talk about weapons and their effectiveness. Ryder left her side once she was at the entrance of Lexa's tent and disappeared as he often did until she required him, how he found her she was still unsure of.

Entering the tent she saw Lexa entertaining a woman that was about the age of her mother. Both turned to look at her as she entered, Lexa rose and walked to her with soft eyes and a slight smile on her face. "Clarke, come and meet Luna of the Boat People."

"You and I are going to have a talk later about your messages." She hissed and Lexa gave her a nod along with a quirk of her lips, meaning she was partially amused.

Luna rose and Clarke took in her blue eyes and black locks of hair that hung around her instead of in braids. She nodded to Clarke and held out her arm, the blond embraced the woman's arm as she had with Anya months before. "I have heard much about you Clarke of the Sky People, _Wanheda_ to the clans."

"I have heard nothing of you Luna, for that I apologize on behalf of _Trigeda_ and _Heda_."

The woman chuckled and nodded, dropping her arm. "Do not apologize, you fought a war and I was not among those that sent warriors as my clan was busy repairing our broken ships that suffered during a storm. You had no reason to know of me and as for being told, Alexandria does not tell others of the clans unless she wishes to."

"Alexandria?" Clarke looked over at Lexa, "I thought your name was Lexa?"

"You perceive that because that is the name I gave Marcus when we first met. I did not attempt to dissuade your people from calling me anything other than Lexa so there is no fault." She moved over to Clarke, "I much prefer Lexa to Alexandria so I told those around me not to correct you."

Luna chuckled at that and shook her head, "I can see that Maxim was right, you have chosen well with _Heda kom Skaikru_. We are lucky that the writings state that you and _Wanheda_ are as destined as Forsa and Aven."

"Excuse me…" Clarke turned to Lexa and the brunette moved closer to her.

"Clarke I ask you reserve your anger until we are alone." She looked into blue eyes with a pleading that Clarke rarely saw. "We will speak but now is not the time."

Figuring that it was the closest Lexa could come to begging she decided to just nod and look back at Luna. "If you'll excuse me, I have to show my mother the healing tent as she mentioned wanting to see it." Clarke just gave Lexa a glare as she left.

* * *

A/N: Uh oh, after a wonderful evening and morning Lexa finds herself once again in hot water with Clarke.

Next: Lexa reveals the truth about what was said in Polis and everyone does attend the union ceremony (finally).

Please read and review...


	11. A Wedding of Truth

Hatred into Love

Spoilers: All Season 1 and Season 2 of the 100; Spoilers from San Diego Comic Con The 100 Panel

Disclaimer: I own nothing!

* * *

The union ceremony began as the sun rose overhead. Clarke found herself sitting with her people and Luna's small delegation on one of the long benches. Lexa stood in front of the couple that were binding themselves to each other for the rest of their lives. The couple were no older than Octavia and Lincoln, both wore nice clothing instead of their usual armor and Clarke had to wonder where the clothing came from since Polis traders wouldn't arrive until right before the next full moon. The bride wore a green dress that hung snuggly from her frame while the groom wore pants and a brown shirt, neither of their hair was in braids as a ceremony meant putting their warrior status away for the day. That also meant weapons weren't on either of their persons, allowing others to guard them.

Lincoln translated the ceremony for them as it was in Trigedasleng and Clarke knew her Trigedasleng was limited mostly to war and battle. She'd have to see about asking Lexa to teach her, after she tore into the woman for Luna's comment of course. The thought of Lexa made her look over the leader as she stood performing the tying ceremony, a soft ribbon wrapped around the couple's hands. Instead of her armor, Lexa's dress was a soft brown with a design similar to Clarke's own blue dress. She looked happy for once, as if her duties as _Heda_ weren't burdened with death or war. It made her seem almost softer, more beautiful but Clarke doubted that was possible. The vows the couple took made Clarke realize that the bonds formed between _houmons_ wasn't a marriage per say but a sacred and life-long union of souls.

"Evon," Lincoln spoke softly as her translated what Nor, the bride, said. "I bind my spirit to yours, tying our lives together till the gods separate us. Your burdens are mine as mine are yours. Your battles are mine as mine are yours. My love never fading and always present. My body yours to find pleasure and to bear your blood. I am yours from this hour on."

Clarke smiled as she listened to the words, beautiful and filled with the love the warrior had for her _houmon_. As Clarke looked up she found Lexa's eyes on hers. The green orbs held love and desire in them, allowing Clarke to quiet her anger at the brunette for a moment. Although as Evon spoke the same vows to Nor, the blond found her anger rising to the surface yet again. Despite the anger, a small part of her imagined standing before Lexa with the same vows but that would never be as Lexa's vows as _Heda_ prevented it. At that thought Clarke realized that she had fallen in love with Lexa, deeper than she'd ever felt love with another person and the idea of never being with that person was a punch to the gut.

* * *

The actual ceremony was followed by friendly combat between the new couple's families as well as a large feast. Despite being Nor and Evon's union ceremony, status called for Lexa to be allowed the seat at the middle of the table with Luna to her left and Clarke to her right. During the feast Clarke found that Evon's family was actually from Luna's clan, he'd started training in Polis as a teen and just settled with the Trigeda after. It was also the fact that he was Luna's cousin that the woman showed up, so due to her being there for a wedding instead of politics Clarke found herself relaxing partially.

"Your skills are unheard of and will be envied." Clarke looked up at Luna's voice to see her conversing with Abby. Indra and Abby had been sat opposite of Clarke and Lexa, neither happy about the fact but at least the warrior hadn't drawn her sword. "If _Skaikru_ can truly assist in turning reapers back into men then your healing is beyond those of our people, Polis included."

"Don't encourage my mother." Clarke looked over at Luna. "Our egos are already large enough."

Luna chuckled and looked over at the healer opposite of them. "I must say Abby, when your daughter's union occurs it will be a celebration of which Polis has never seen before. All the clans will come and the celebration will last days, perhaps weeks."

Abby looked over at her daughter, "Clarke is there something you need to tell me?"

How was she supposed to explain something she knew nothing about? She and Lexa hadn't spoken yet and apparently Luna was privy to something she wasn't. Also the woman didn't seem to know how to keep her mouth shut on matters either. "Nothing important."

"Luna speaks of the temple writings of _Wanheda_." Lexa spoke calmly as she put her cup down. "The temple writings state she will unite with a great leader of the clans. Who that will be is still unknown."

That seemed to placate her mother and Clarke met Lexa's eyes silently sending her thanks. She was aware that the woman she was angry with had just saved her from her mother's wrath. Lexa's right hand found the blond's thigh and squeezed slightly, Clarke put her hand over Lexa's to trap the warmth the calloused hand provided through the soft fabric of her dress. Once she released the warrior's hand, Clarke picked up her cup to take a sip of wine.

* * *

Yelling was heard and all turned to see a warrior with his sword drawn. He was charging at the table and towards Clarke but before she could react, Lexa did. The woman drew her sword, from where Clarke had no idea, and the scraping of metal was heard as Lexa's sword met that of the warrior's. She pushed his back and Clarke narrowed her eyes as her title was used in the same sentence as 'kwin' and 'death'. Before she could respond, Lexa spoke firmly. " _Jomp en op en yu jomp ai op_."

" _Heda_ …" The warrior started going on and she immediately stopped him with her sword pressing against his.

" _Trigeda, sen in ai!_ " Everyone's attention as on Lexa immediately, " _Klark kom Skaikru, Wanheda, es ai kwin. Jomp en op en yu jomp ai op._ "

All were silent and those that did respond replied with " _sha Heda_."

At those words Clarke felt like equally kissing the woman as well as strangling her. She found herself thankful that most everyone from her party didn't understand Trigedasleng. However, seeing Octavia and Lincoln starring in partial shock made her want to grab Steltrona and run away again. Indra finally glared at her for the first time since she'd been announced formally as _Wanheda_. Her mother cut into the conversation as Lexa sat down, the celebration going back to normal.

"What just happened?"

"Clan misunderstanding, one of Luna's men saw Clarke's braids and thought she was misrepresenting herself as a warrior." Octavia quickly covered for her, "it's basically a huge insult to warriors."

"Does that happen often?"

Lexa looked up at the woman, "on occasion but he has been reminded of his place and of Clarke's status."

Indra put her cup down forcefully, "you tread dangerous ground _Heda_. As _Heda_ …"

" _Em pleni_ Indra." Lexa spoke softly but firmly. "You know questioning _Heda_ is welcoming the removal of your tongue. I do not wish to do so."

" _Sha Heda_." The woman lowered her head and took her cup in hand again.

* * *

The call to spar was thrown out and they watched the battle between Nor's brother and Evon's father. Clarke found it quite amazing as it wasn't the normal training practice spars. There were not actual weapons, just wooden sticks and there were no hard blows. Laughter replaced insults or yells to do better, it was meant to be fun. Clarke felt Lexa's hand on her thigh as warm breath brushed her ear.

Turning her head she found green orbs a few inches away, a soft quirk of Lexa's mouth indicated a controlled smile. "Are you enjoying the celebration?"

"Like you said I would."

"Has your anger calmed?"

A smirk reached the blond's face, "not in the slightest."

"What secrets are you two sharing?" Raven popped up asking and Lexa looked over at the mechanic.

"I was just speaking to Clarke about the best way to drive a sword into her enemy."

The mechanic put up her hand, "I shouldn't have asked."

"What is the best way?" Clarke put her elbow on the table and let her chin rest in her open palm while looking at Lexa. "Straight in or just taking off the head?"

Lexa tilted her head to the side, "do you want a slow or quick death is the question one must ask."

"Can we not talk about death during a wedding?" Abby asked with a slight hint of displeasure on her face.

"Of course Abby." Lexa spoke and turned back to her food.

* * *

As the night progressed the celebrations became even louder and Clarke retreated to Lexa's tent, finding the leader drawing out a map. She didn't bother turning around when Clarke entered or pause in her drawing of the line boundaries between their respected lands. When Lexa's hand rose from the paper to grab a darker hue of charcoal, Clarke twisted her around and crushed her lips against those of the leader. Lexa dropped the charcoal and let her hands drift to Clarke's neck, opening her mouth to let Clarke in. It was over before it began and Lexa soon felt the sting on her cheek after Clarke's hand connected with her.

"That was for calling me your queen publicly!"

Lexa met blue eyes as she rubbed her cheek, "which, the kiss or the slap?"

"Both!" She moved to sit on Lexa's throne, aware the woman gave a slight glare before relaxing against the table. "Now, explain to me what Luna meant this morning and at the feast."

The brunette bent to pick up the charcoal before moving to Clarke, holding out her hand. "Come with me and I will show you."

Clarke rose but didn't accept Lexa's hand, she was too mad at her. However, she did follow her into the small private area that held the bed and other small personal items. Sitting on the wolf pelt, she watched Lexa get a box out from one of the chests and laid it on the bed. The woman sat beside Clarke and opened the box, removing the scrolls that were inside. Lexa unrolled them and laid them out till Clarke saw writing along with drawings that told a story. She ran her finger over the image of herself, it amazed her the amount of detail that went into it.

"Did you do this?"

"No, these scrolls were written two generations before my birth. They speak of you, of _Wanheda_ and her journey from the stars till this moment." She unrolled the scroll further to the image of a shield with the symbol of all the clans on it. "When you reunite the clans as one people, thirteen clans as one."

Clarke put her hand on one single image of the biohazard symbol that was part of Forsa's design inside a circle with a small star in the middle of the biohazard sign. "What's this?"

Lexa ran her finger over the writing at the bottom of the image. "It states that the fifth _Heda_ would be bound to _Wanheda_ as Forsa and Aven are bound together. That the vows of _Heda_ are meant in preservation of the bond that would come between them." She looked up to see Clarke looking at her. "My vows were meant to allow me to wait for you so I would not claim another. This would not have been known until your scroll was read upon your arrival. The same is stated in Aven's scrolls, of your coming and our bonding so we may bring peace and new life to the clans."

"Lexa I don't understand?"

The brunette took Clarke's hand and held it, green eyes boring into blue. "Our spirits were meant for one another Clarke and in time we shall unite together. After that time we will unite against _Azkru Kwin_ and deliver peace to the clans, uniting them as one."

Clarke was silent for a moment and stared at the symbol in front of her. "You called me your queen in front of your people."

"You will be my queen, you shall always be _Wanheda_ to the clans but you will be my queen." Lexa reached out and rubbed at the charcoal she'd left on Clarke's neck when she'd kissed her earlier. "I know you require time Clarke, to calm your anger towards me and learn the emotions you feel. I will give you all the time you wish, if you wish to return with your people…"

The blond shook her head, "I can't go back there, I want to go back to Polis where I can have the freedom I need."

" _Skaikru_ does not have a representative in Polis so it would be acceptable but you must appoint a leader of your clan as Indra is mine when I am in Polis." Lexa watched Clarke process what she was saying. "Our spirits are destined Clarke but there is not a specific time written in the scrolls, it could be weeks or years between these events." She moved close to Clarke and kissed her cheek before whispering in her ear. "I am yours Clarke and I shall wait as long as you need in order to claim you as mine."

Clarke turned her head to look at Lexa. "Can we go back to Polis after the celebration?"

"We can return to Polis whenever you wish, a queen is not denied when there is peace among the clans and she can have what she wants."

"Maybe another day, I'll see if Lincoln and Octavia can escort my people back to the camp." Clarke gently rolled up the scroll and put it in it's box before laying down on the bed.

* * *

Lexa put the box up in the chest before lying beside Clarke, placing her head on her open palm as her elbow rested against the furs. "Tell me your burdens Clarke." She ran her hand through Clarke's blond locks. "Your burdens are my burdens or at least, I wish them to be."

Clarke shook her head and looked at the ceiling of the tent. "I need time to think Lexa, I'm still angry at you but it's hard to be angry when part of me forgives you."

"Do not forgive me Clarke, I am undeserving of your forgiveness." She saw blue eyes meet green.

"Forgiveness is mine to give, deserving or not." Clarke rolled onto her side and closed her eyes as she leaned into Lexa's propped up arm. "I like your dress."

"I shall have one acquired for you when we reach Polis."

A soft chuckle escaped Clarke, "no I meant I like it on you."

" _Mochof ai kwin_ ," Lexa sat up and pulled the spare wolf pelt from where it sat on the end of the bed. "Now rest, you are tired and it will be a long day tomorrow due to Nor and Evon wishing a hunting competition between their families. Luna has wagered an additional third of trade goods on the fact she can bring more meat back personally than I can."

Clarke chuckled as she felt the second wolf pelt fall on her, "she's going to be sacrificing a lot of trade goods."

"I am aware." Lexa pushed back a wayward strand of Clarke's hair. "I shall join you after I calm the celebration, the hunters need sleep and those drinking must be quieted."

* * *

A/N: Short I know but I am on vacation and I am trying to enjoy it before Monday comes and I am back at university.

Next: Clarke breaks the news to her mother and friends that she is returning to Polis.

Please read and review...


	12. Secrets Breed Enemies

Hatred into Love

Spoilers: All Season 1 and Season 2 of the 100; Spoilers from San Diego Comic Con The 100 Panel

Disclaimer: I own nothing!

* * *

Clarke found her mother by the horses as everyone in their party were preparing to go. It was early morning four days after the ceremony and it was time for _Skaikru_ to return home. As she neared them Octavia and Lincoln both bowed their head in respect, a sign of her status as Lexa's queen or so she had come to learn after Indra had caught her telling both young warriors not to bow. She attached a bag to the roan stallion that her mother stood petting quietly as they all waited.

"Lincoln and Octavia will take you back to Camp Jaha." Clarke spoke and her mother looked up at her. "I will be remaining behind."

"Clarke you can't…"

Seeing her mother's face she took a step forward and took her hand gently. "I've been free for so long that living at Camp Jaha feels like living in a cage. I can't go back, not to routines and schedules when I need freedom." She smiled at her mother, "I'll be in Polis, it's the capital and the safest place in the clans. Once I'm settled I'll join the trade caravan to come visit."

Abby was silent for a few moments before speaking. "What will you do there?"

"Help our people, I can establish trade and broker peace." She smiled at her mother, "I'm doing what is best for our people and the best thing I can do for them is to be a representative in Polis."

"You'll visit?"

"I promise." Clarke hugged her mother and Abby held onto her.

"When you're ready," Abby pulled back and looked into blue eyes, "I know you'll come home."

Clarke didn't have the heart to tell her mother that Camp Jaha didn't feel like home anymore. Instead she nodded and took a step back, looking to Lincoln and Octavia. "Protect the transport."

" _Sha Wanheda_." Lincoln spoke softly before urging Octavia onto her horse and mounting his own.

Once her mother and the others were on their horses, Clarke stood watching as they departed. As they hit the tree line the blond felt a brush of air beside her and turned her head slightly to see Lexa standing a foot from her. The brunette turned to look at her with a soft smile before turning to several warriors that stood nearby, a soft nod to them had them climbing the trees to watch the transport from above.

"The horses are ready Clarke, we will depart as well so we can reach Polis by night."

Clarke turned her body as her people disappeared into the trees, warriors watching from above as well as the ground. Walking beside Lexa they made their way to their own horses, she took the reins from one of the warriors that held them in order to mount her horse. "Where will I stay when I get to Polis, a house?"

"The palace," Lexa looked at her as she mounted her own horse. "It is where you belong Clarke and I will have several wolf pelts delivered to your quarters so you may be comfortable."

* * *

 **Two Months Later**

* * *

The soft knock woke Clarke and she opened her eyes to see the light from window flooding the room. A second soft knock happened and she sat up, pushing her hair back as the door opened to reveal her attendant, Elsa. Despite asking not to have one, Lexa saw fit to assign her one and had sent the girl back when Clarke sent her away. Eventually after a week of confusing the poor girl, Clarke conceded defeat and allowed the girl to help with minor things. The twelve year old beamed at Clarke's insistence that studies came first because Elsa's favorite thing was school.

"Your breakfast." Elsa put a tray on the bed and quickly picked up the clothes on the ground before Clarke could stop her. " _Heda_ asked me to deliver a message to you."

Clarke looked up from where she sat tearing bread and cheese. "What is the message?"

"She states she will be in specific trade negotiations the next three days and will be unable to see you. She has given your guard enough trade coins for you to visit the market. The orphan children are also expecting your visit as was promised a week ago."

The blond nodded, "thank you Elsa, school is going to start soon so you should get going."

"I shall drop these clothes at the washing center before I go." Elsa smiled and headed out the door, closing it behind her.

As she dressed for the day, Clarke found it odd that Lexa would not be able to meet with her. During her two months of residing in Polis, Lexa always met with her in the evenings and she consulted Clarke on all trade negotiations because a specific order sometimes would be doubled if it was something Camp Jaha could use. The fact she was making trade agreements behind closed doors and refusing to meet with Clarke made the blond very suspicious. Clearly Lexa was hiding something and Clarke wanted to know what it was.

* * *

She found Ryder waiting outside her room waiting for her as he usually did. He'd began residing in Polis with his husband, Drov, as his spouse preferred Polis to Tondc. Upon learning that Ryder was in Polis, Lexa politely ordered Ryder back to duty as Clarke's guard. He'd given no resistance and even introduced Clarke to the couple's new daughter. The man followed the blond at a distance, saying nothing while keeping an eye on her. He knew how much Clarke preferred he observe at a distance so no one realized she had a guard with her at all times.

The market was crowded as it normally was in the morning. Clarke surveyed the different stalls and finally found one that sold clothing. Clothing in Polis was different from those worn by warriors in the villages, they were nicer and a lot softer in color. Going through the clothing she found a soft fur-lined cloak without any ornaments on it. Twenty trade coins later and the cloak was hers along with a soft green dress.

No one said anything even if they recognized her, a bow of their heads was all she received. Ryder kept his distance as they moved through the market, Clarke looked back on occasion to check where he was and was thankful she was within sight distance but it would take him a few seconds to get to her.

She made her way to one of the more familiar stores, one of which the shop owner always greeted her with a free charcoal pencil. Stepping inside the store, she headed straight to the right side where all the art supplies were and allowed herself to stand as she surveyed the supplies. She had need of another drawing book and a fresh set of charcoal. Clarke had also had the urge to start painting but that would require a costly deer skin canvas and paints, which were quite expensive as they were handmade.

" _Wanheda_ , you have come again." The shop owner, Nell, made her way over and stood beside Clarke. "What have you need of today? Charcoal, a book to draw in or perhaps paint this time."

Clarke turned to the woman, "how much for the set of paint?"

"Fifty coins."

"No coins but instead a soft wolf fur." Clarke looked at the woman, "the fur alone is worth more than fifty coins."

Nell nodded her head, "a fair deal, for the fur I will give you the book with the paint."

"I assume the charcoal set is still five coins."

" _Sha Wanheda_."

Clarke handed over the five coins as she spoke softly. "I shall have Ryder bring the fur tomorrow."

"I shall have the supplies ready for him when he brings the fur."

A quick goodbye and Clarke was out the door, she merely glanced at Ryder and started making her way to the palace on again. It would be afternoon before she could visit with the orphan children as they had school then training to attend and she wouldn't interrupt their schedule. Deciding to go to her quarters, she made her way upstairs and dismissed Ryder before settling on her bed to read the books that she'd stolen from Lexa's private stash.

* * *

Two days passed quickly but Clarke found herself longing for Lexa on the third day. She's grown accustomed to dinner with Lexa or sitting for hours just speaking about anything from politics to memories of childhood. In the absence of that time she realized it was constant, that Lexa was a constant that she craved to have. Whatever the reason Lexa wouldn't see her, good or bad, she'd have some choice words ready when she saw the brunette again.

Night had fallen on the third day and Clarke found herself curled up under her wolf pelts, comfortable on the soft fur while the moonlight slowly filtered into the room through the window. As she started drifting off to sleep, Clarke felt the bed dip and a soft kiss laid below her ear. Turning over she found Lexa leaning over her with a soft smile on her face, eyes seemed both haunted and happy at the same time.

"Go back to sleep _ai kwin_ , I shall be here when you wake up." Lexa brushed back a piece of hair that stuck to Clarke's cheek.

Clarke closed her eyes but allowed her arm to circle Lexa's waist despite the way the brunette was partially sitting and laying down at the same time. Lexa laid down on the bed after removing her shoes and as soon as her back was flat against the duck feathered mattress, Clarke had her arm over Lexa and her forehead against the brunette's upper arm. "Missed you."

"As I missed you Clarke, we shall speak more in the morning."

Clarke kissed her arm and Lexa turned her head to kiss the blond's crown. Lexa felt Clarke's arm tighten around her waist so she gently braced the arm with her hand so Clarke could feel her without the need to continue wrapping herself around the leader. "Promise we talk?"

The words were chopped due to sleep but Lexa understood perfectly. She'd come to understand little things about Clarke, things most wouldn't even know unless they spent time with the blond far more than normal. Things like Clarke preferred _Trigeda_ dresses to her clothes from the Ark, her preference to sleep under wolf pelts than any other furs available to her, that drawing calmed her anger more than any other action and that she loved to watch the children because she'd never been afforded their innocence. Laying a second kiss to the crown of her head, Lexa gazed down at the peaceful former leader that lay beside her. "We will talk but for now we sleep."

"Okay." It was mumbled and soft but soon after its utterance Lexa felt the blond relax completely, sleep having overtaken her.

* * *

Morning came with a knock and Lexa opened her eyes to find Clarke groaning. A second knock on the door was followed by Elsa walking in with a tray. She paused at seeing Lexa, something the leader expected as she rarely stayed through the night and if she did, was gone by the time Elsa woke Clarke. The blond sat up and pushed back her hair where it had fallen in her eyes during sleep. Elsa put the tray on the bed and gave a slight bow of her head before collecting the clothing on the ground and disappeared through the door, not a word uttered.

"You're still here." Clarke looked at her with surprise.

"So I am, trading with _Azgeda_ is a very tiring task." Lexa pulled the tray of food over and watched as Clarke went for the cheese and bread first.

Clarke tore a piece of bread off the small loaf and put a piece of cheese on it. "Ice Nation? I thought they didn't come to Polis."

"Normally they do not but their winter was brutal and most of the animals they hunt were killed by the storms. I was forced to re-negotiate the trade agreements we had with them in the past. Their queen wanted more meat then we could spare for the upcoming winter. To trade the amount she wanted would have left half of my villages without food."

"What did you offer her?"

Lexa took a piece of bread and shrugged slightly, "she has always envied our blacksmiths so I promised half the meat she wanted and fifteen swords. She has yet to agree and I expect an answer by the time the sun is straight above us. It is my hope that she'll accept but Nia is known to be difficult at best."

"How can you be civil with her after what she did?" Clarke met the green eyes looking at her.

"I do what must be done for peace, Costia wanted peace between the clans as war destroyed her village. I swore peace in her name, even with the woman who took her." Lexa let the piece of bread in her hand fall back onto the plate. "She would not want war in her name, that is something I knew about her well enough to make peace despite my heart crying for vengeance. Besides, I knew honestly that the gods took her from me because I broke my vows. I did what had to be done, I allowed no other to affect me and I made peace with even those I hated."

Clarke reached over and touched Lexa's hand, threading their fingers together. "I'm not sure I could do the same."

"But you did, when I demanded Finn's death you allowed it moments before declaring peace between us."

* * *

A knock came on the door before Clarke could respond to the statement Lexa put forward. Instead she looked at the door and answered the knock. " _Komba raun_."

The door opened and they found Jaz, Lexa's guard, standing at the door. " _Heda_ …"

"Speak true Jaz, what brings you to interrupt my council?"

" _Azgeda Kwin_ …" he spoke and used his eyes to motion that behind him the woman stood.

Lexa disentangled her fingers from Clarke's and stood up off the bed to pull on her boots, moving to the door as a middle aged woman moved into the room. " _Gon we Nia!_ "

The woman looked at Lexa and then past her to Clarke, a smirk forming on her face. She spoke in Trigedasleng, of which Clarke only understood two or three words. Lexa narrowed her eyes and motioned out of the room as if to get the woman to leave. " _Haukom?_ "

" _Nau!_ "

"Not until you tell me her name, what is one little thing?" Nia looked over at Clarke, "tell me girl, what is your name? What girl does _Heda_ take to her bed now?"

Clarke narrowed her eyes as she slid off the bed and neared the woman. " _Klark kom Skaikru_ , _Wanheda_." That made the woman looked between Clarke and Lexa, her smirk falling. "And _Heda_ doesn't take me to her bed or will she. I am merely here for my people and _Heda_ was kind enough to ask after me since I felt ill after eating some bad meat."

"Apologizes _Wanheda_ , I did not realize you were in Polis."

"Like hell you didn't. Your scouts now doubt brought you news that I was once a day's ride from your borders. Also you told Roan if he brought you my head that you'd allow him back on _Azgeda_ territory." Clarke took a few steps towards Nia, "lying gets neither of us anywhere. Don't expect trade with _Skaikru_ , putting a price on my head won't open up trade nogiations like taking the head of _Kostia kom Trikru_ did with _Heda_. My people aren't so forgiving and we tend to take offense to such small things such as a hand gesture so imagine what a price on their leader's head will do." She looked over at Lexa, "please get her out of here so I can rest, I'm still not feeling well."

Once Jaz and Lexa got the woman out, Clarke laid back down in bed and attempted to calm herself. Upon reaching for her drawing book she remembered it was full and she'd ordered a new one with Nell. Getting up, Clarke moved to the chest at the bottom of the bed and withdrew a wolf's pelt. Once Ryder had it with instructions of what to do, she laid back down in bed to think about what she'd done.

Clarke realized she'd all but told Nia that she knew the Ice Queen had put a price on her head. Mentioning Costia had given the woman the knowledge she knew intimate things about Lexa that most would not know. She knew a lecture about what to reveal to one's enemy was coming later from Lexa, a lecture she was sure to hate but learn something from in the long run. In the end Clarke yelled and threw the plate of food across the room, more pissed with herself than anything else. Her ability to keep her mouth shut was apparently absent and it would cost her in the end she realized.

* * *

It was another two days before she saw Lexa again and like the time before she crawled into Clarke's bed in the early hours of the morning. Clarke stirred when she felt an arm wrap around her middle and familiar lips brushed her neck. Turning her head enough she could see over her shoulder with sleepy eyes, Clarke found Lexa lifting her head as she finished kissing soft skin. The blond felt Lexa's hand rest on her wrist like normal, her thumb brushing against moonlight-kissed skin repeatedly.

"Sleep _ai kwin_ , I am here and I shall be here when you wake."

"Ice Nation?"

Lexa kissed her temple, "gone with what they came for but you need not worry about that."

Clarke rolled over and rested her head against Lexa's chest, hearing the heartbeat under soft cotton. "I worry you her."

Lying on her back, Lexa brushed her hand through Clarke's locks. "Do not worry for me, she views you as a leader who destroyed something no other could. She fears you, that is easy enough to see. You do not create a weakness, instead you are a strength as our alliance is something Nia fears most of all."

"Okay." Clarke nuzzled against her shirt and yawned before falling comfortably into Lexa's side.

"She cannot part us, I will not allow her to." Lexa kissed Clarke's head. "The gods gave you to me, you are mine and I shall destroy all who try to take you from me."

* * *

A/N: Okay so the Ice Queen thought she had something over Lexa but actually doesn't.

Next: An assassination attempt is made...

Please read and review...


	13. Weakness is Strength

Hatred into Love

Spoilers: All Season 1 and Season 2 of the 100; Spoilers from San Diego Comic Con The 100 Panel

Disclaimer: I own nothing!

* * *

Clarke felt heaviness around her, like a storm pulling her under and when she opened her eyes she found her father sitting above her with worry on his face. Groaning she tried to push whatever was heavy on top of her off but it continued to stay on her. She felt something on her arm and looked to see a spider as big as a hand. It walked up her arm and all attempts to free her arm to get it off were in vain. Clarke screamed, screamed to her father to help but all he did was stare at her in concern as if taunting her at the same time.

"Dad please help, help me!" She struggled but was continued to be held down. "Get it off. Get it off of me please!"

Her screams were in vain as much as her movements were and she struggled but soon the spider was removed and instead the hands were those of her enemy. She found the Ice Queen smirking as a bowl was held to her mouth.

"You must drink if you wish to recover." The woman smirked and forced her mouth open but despite the attempts to move her head away, she was forced to drink the poison that she knew would harm her.

" _Sis au beja! Sis au beja! Azgeda! Azgeda!_ " She screamed in Trigedasleng but nothing helped and as she felt like vomiting the Ice Queen laughed manically.

"No help comes for you _Wanheda_ , no help comes." The woman held up a blade and lowered it to her neck. "Like before you shall suffer."

"No please, no!"

The woman ice blue eyes bore into her, "tell me everything of _Heda_!"

"I know nothing of _Heda_ , please don't!" She cried out as she felt the blade dig into her skin.

* * *

Lexa looked at Elsa and the healer that had been called, the woman had been woken early the morning when Lexa had woken to find Clarke sweating heavily and hot with fever. Elsa had come immediately, her room right next to Clarke's and had instantly ran for a healer. There had been no doubt it was poison, Clarke's water pitcher had residue of slow-acting poison.

"She thinks she is under attack by _Azgeda_ , why _Heda_?"

Lexa rubbed at Clarke's arm, "she was kidnapped by _Azkru_ but escaped to one of the border villages. Her dreams make her believe she is back in that time and she protects me even against those my mind conjures to harm her."

The healer crushed herbs and dropped them in a bowl of water. "This heal mind." The broken English was still understandable and Lexa nodded to her in order for the woman to give it to Clarke.

"Darkseed poisoning is rare Jupe says, her mother works at the herb stall in the market. If you handle it wrong then you damage the potency. Whoever gave her darkseed knew how to poison _Wanheda_."

"Those that did shall have no mercy." Lexa looked at Elsa. "Who else sales darkseed besides Jupe's mother?"

"None sale it, we brought it back one day by accident and her mother punished us both for bringing back the toxic herb. She said we could be seen as planning a poisoning."

Lexa nodded and reached up to brush away the hair that had fallen in Clarke's eyes during her thrashing. "Talk to her mother and see who sales or who has the skill to make the poison."

"At once _Heda_." The girl moved to the door and looked back. "do you wish me to stay with _Wanheda_?"

"I will stay with her." Lexa stated softly and ran the back of her knuckles against Clarke's cheek.

* * *

It was midday by the time Clarke woke, Lexa found her opening her eyes slowly. She looked around before her eyes landed on Lexa. Instantly the leader moved closer and held Clarke's hand as she leaned over the blond. Blue eyes were surrounded by purple bags under her eyes and were bloodshot from the poison, normally pale skin was even paler due to the fever.

"Why do I feel like I just went to war with a thousand of your men?"

Lexa squeezed her hand, "you were poisoned with darkseed. If I had not awoken during the night to find you then I would have woken to your spirit already gone. It is deadly and although slow, in a matter of hours one can die."

"Who?"

"Elsa is questioning an herb seller on who has the ability to make it and use it." Lexa reached up and traced Clarke's cheek with her finger. "Whoever it is will pay with their life. I will not give them mercy when they nearly took what is most precious to me."

Clarke groaned as she tried to sit up and was pushed back instantly by Lexa. "I can't allow you to kill everyone."

"This is something you will not sway me on Clarke. Even forgetting you were given to me by the gods, you are _Wanheda_ and poisoning you is punishable by death. Do you not remember Gustus when he attempted to poison me? I cannot give them mercy and neither can you, not this time."

"Gustus poisoned himself, he made you think the poison was for you."

"I am aware but you have seen the penalty and it must stand." Lexa looked down into weak blue eyes. "Poisoning you, no matter the reason, will earn them death. I will not allow you to be taken from me, I will destroy all those who attempt to do so."

"I wish you'd had that mentality months ago when I stood at the base of the mountain." Clarke leaned back against the pillow under her and sighed. "Why am I so weak?"

Lexa moved the fresh pitcher of water, untainted and drawn by her own hand out of the well. Pouring a glass she returned and gently slid a hand under Clarke's neck, helping her lift her head in order to drink. "The poison has that effect, in time the antidote will help you regain your strength." She pulled the cup away when Clarke started drinking too quickly. "Slowly Clarke, you are weak and too much water can work against the antidote."

* * *

When Clarke leaned back she watched as Lexa put the cup on the table. "You've been poisoned haven't you? That's how you know so much about the poison."

"Not I but one close to me," Lexa sat down on the bed. "My sister, when I was first chosen as _Heda_ she was poisoned to test my weakness. We only knew how to cure it because the one who poisoned her was not smart enough to leave the palace. When all the quarters were searched he was found with the supplies necessary to make the poison and also the antidote. He met his fate by my sister's hand, she poisoned his own water when he was in the prison. Other than him we do not know who has the ability to make the poison. Our herb sellers do not touch it for fear they would be seen as plotting against someone."

Clarke reached out and gripped Lexa's hand, the brunette gently squeezed back. "I want a fair punishment, don't let your emotions get in the way. You taught me that our emotions hinder our ability to make smart decisions."

"What is fair Clarke? They will not gain their life, I will not allow someone who nearly took you from our people, from me, to continue breathing." Lexa leaned in and brought Clarke's hand to her mouth. "I have agreed to give you the time you require to come to me emotionally. I understand you need that time but you must understand Clarke that without you I am only left with my people. I am just _Heda_ without you, Lexa does not exist because only Alexandria is left."

Wrangling her hand away from the brunette, Clarke reached up and wiped under Lexa's eyes. Holding her finger up she showed it to be wet. "You shouldn't cry over me."

"I have wept over you before, I shall do so in the future."

The door opened and both turned to see Elsa, she paused in her steps. "I did not realize _Wanheda_ had woken. I apologize for entering unannounced."

Lexa sat straighter and motioned with her hand for the girl to move towards them. "Tell me what information you have gained."

Elsa moved to the bed and looked between them, "an _Azgeda_ healer inquired about darkseed during the queen's visit. Jupe's mother told him he would not find any in Polis and inquiring about darkseed was dangerous. He mentioned he would find an herb seller in Virg that would sell to him without questions."

"There are only two healers in Virg." Lexa stated as she looked at the girl. "I shall send for both, stay here with Clarke until I return."

" _Sha Heda_." The girl sat where Lexa stood from.

"I shall return _ai kwin_." Lexa squeezed Clarke's hand and bent to kiss her temple. "Do as Elsa says and listen to the healer when she comes. She is liberal in her punishments for not listening, even I am subjected to them at times."

Clarke snorted softly, "I'm a healer, I think I can take care of myself."

"You are not versed in the ways of herbs and their dangers. Once you have learned of them then I shall no longer worry."

* * *

As night fell on the capital, Clarke ushered Elsa to her room by way of command as their dared not leave her. The healer had visited twice and each time made her drink a concoction she was sure would kill her but the woman explained in her broken English that the antidote had be drank a specific amount of times in order to work. Eventually tired from the day that seemed longer than war, Clarke found herself falling asleep as the moon rose in the sky.

The only time she woke was when a soft hand lifted her neck from the pillow. Opening her eyes she saw Lexa with a cup. "No more horrible."

"I know it tastes like death but the alternative is far worse." Lexa tipped her head back and coached Clarke to drink it. "I would rather your anger then see you as you were when I woke two nights ago. I have never feared anything since becoming _Heda_ but I knew fear once again when I found you as I did."

Clarke finished off the cup and laid back down, curling her hand under her chin. "Sleep forever."

"You may sleep as long as you wish." Lexa put the cup aside and leaned over to blow out the candles. "Do you wish me to stay Clarke or shall I return to my own bed?"

"Stay." It was soft but Lexa bent down to undo her boots, once they were off she walked around the bed and slipped in beside Clarke.

With an arm around the blond and a soft kiss to the shoulder her tank top left exposed, Lexa closed her eyes. "I see Elsa helped you dress, how did you come to wear my clothing?"

"Mine." Clarke's sleep addled brain supplied little in way of words but Lexa merely chuckled and kissed her shoulder again.

"You may keep them Clarke if that is your wish." Lexa pulled Clarke closer and rested her chin against the blond's shoulder. "Sleep _ai kwin_ , sleep and regain your strength."

Clarke threaded their fingers together as she mumbled again. "Try you me up."

"Shh, sleep _ai hodnes_."

* * *

Clarke woke to the sun for what had to be the third morning and just like the two before, Lexa was silently laying behind her threading a hand through her hair. Rolling over she came face to face with the brunette. Lexa had made an announcement that she was only to be disturbed for life or death matters and the arrival of the two healers from Virg. She'd taken to her chambers, a quiet time of council where she would pray to Forsa and determine her continued path as _Heda_. After the first day in chambers she'd emerged, at least privately as the public thought she was still in prayer and thought. Instead she'd stayed with Clarke, helping her heal and just spending rare time with her.

"Good morning." Clarke smiled as she burrowed under her wolf pelt to keep warm.

"How are you feeling?"

Clarke shrugged and closed her eyes, "better, hungry like I could eat an entire horse." She opened her eyes and looked at Lexa, "don't kill a horse, I'll be fine with bread, cheese and dried boar."

Lexa gave her a smile, "I would not kill a horse but I would have an entire boar brought form the stores for you if that is what you wish."

"What I really want is to get out of bed and get a bath." Clarke rolled over onto her back and stretched her arms out. "I feel like I've been in the forest for a month, I feel disgusting."

Lexa sat up and drew back the pelt Clarke slept under, surveying the blond as she lay in a tank top and shorts. "You are beautiful, I do not believe that the gods gave you any physical flaws."

Clarke yanked the fur back over her, "why do you say physical flaws, are you saying I have others?"

"Many but mentioning them may bring your anger to life again so I do not do so." Lexa leaned down and kissed Clarke on the lips, pulling back when the blond tried to deepen it. "If you wish to bathe I shall have Elsa draw you a bath. I was hoping you would be well enough to dine with me tonight, I have a clan leader visiting and I had hope you would meet them."

Clarke sat up while huddling under the warmth of the fur. "I'll let you know at lunch if I'm up to it."

"Very well, I must leave you since I must officially emerge from my time of prayer and thought." Lexa stood from the bed and looked down at Clarke. "I prayed frequently to Jula that she would spare you. I even offered to let you no longer be mine if they would spare you."

"What did they say?"

Lexa chuckled softly, "they no doubt called me b _ranwada_. I went out to the garden last night before I came to bed and I saw Aven's sign minutes before I found a new tree growing. Aven's sign and a new tree's growth, it's a blessing from both he and Forsa. I was prepared to give up what I wanted so that you may live, that is the greatest sacrifice once can make and to make it honors the gods."

" _Branwada_ indeed." Clarke smirked at her and Lexa just smiled.

* * *

The sound of talking meant there wasn't a battle of wills ongoing or swords hadn't be drawn. As Clarke entered the small dining hall off the side of the kitchens where Lexa entertained, she found Lexa speaking with a burly man and a willowy girl a few years older than Lexa but her features from a distance spelled some type of relations. She made her way over in the blue dress Lexa had given her, pausing only when the talking stopped.

Both the man and woman looked at her as if she had two heads, probably wondering why she was there. Lexa turned and her eyes softened as they always did, even if her face gave nothing away.

"Clarke of the Sky People has honored us with her presence." Lexa spoke firmly but Clarke knew the playfulness in her voice. It had once been said sarcastically but after her first visit to Polis, it was spoken with a playfulness.

"Sorry I'm late." Clarke nodded to both of the guests.

"You are never late Clarke, the clan leaders are merely early." She looked at both of her guests and motioned to the table. "Perhaps we should sit and eat."

They sat at the table and Elsa appeared with two other attendants to lay down food and pour wine. Clarke merely put her hand up to stop Elsa when she tried to pour wine. "Water only Elsa."

"Of course, apologizes." The girl moved onto the two that sat across from Clarke and Lexa.

Lexa took a sip of her wine. "Clarke may I introduce Todd of the Desert Clan and his _houmon_ , Beth."

"I am sure Alexandria failed to mention I am also her sister." Beth looked at Lexa, "do you ever speak of me or am I just another member of the vast clans you hold power over?"

"Lexa spoke of you the other night." Clarke put down her cup and looked into nearly identical green eyes as the ones she often looked into during her days spent in bed. "She said she regretted her actions towards you and hoped this dinner would mend some of the lost time."

Beth looked between them, "I see you've gone further this time. Not only do you break your vows as _Heda_ but you bring an outsider in so to circumvent them." She looked at Clarke, "are you aware that my sister has broken her vows once already of having no _houmon_ or lover? The gods do not smile on those who break their laws."

"Watch your tongue Beth, sister or not I will place you on a tree for disrespect." Lexa looked at her sister.

Clarke put a hand on Lexa's arm, "no you won't." She turned back to Beth and looked at the woman. "I know about Costia and what was done to her but if you go to the temple the priests will tell you that as _Wanheda_ , you sister breaks no vows with me. Lexa and I don't always see eye to eye and often we argue more than we agree. If your sister was harming the clans, I would be the first to object as I know the sacrifices that must be made to lead and protect my people and we're just a few hundred. I can only imagine what leadings thousands must be like."

"You do not have to defend me Clarke." Lexa stated bluntly.

"Trust me, I'm not." Clarke withdrew her hand and looked at the brunette beside her. "I'm trying to prevent another war, I'm not in the mood to have to consider another betrayal or possible sacrifice of men when it is needless. You want to kill whoever disagrees with you and a civil war is the last thing we need because you and your sister have issues that are a few years behind in resolving."

Todd chuckled and raised his glass towards Clarke. "I like this one much more than the last, she does not fear speaking her tongue. Tell me Clarke of the Sky People, what was it like living among the gods?"

"Much nicer in stories then truth. We saw more death than life and we sacrificed more than should have been necessary. It wasn't living, it was surviving in ways no one should have to and if I have my way, my people never will again." Clarke looked at him, seeing his face fall as he took in her meaning.

* * *

Lexa looked to her sister, "my alliance with _Skaikru_ is beneficial. This is the third child you carry under your heart and without care could be lost like the previous two. Clarke's mother is a healer with healing arts far more advanced than those in Polis. I am sure she would welcome helping you find a way to carry the child till birth."

"I doubt they could help us, they have not been on these lands but more than two seasons."

Clarke nodded, "we turned reapers back into men." She watched the woman's head go back up and saw her interest peak. "My friend had a badly injured leg and was told it would likely not be used again but now she walks on it, even rides a horse without help. Finding out why you haven't been able to keep the baby till term would be a simple thing for my mother to figure out."

"Her help would be greatly appreciated." Beth gave a small smile. "Thank you Clarke of the Sky People."

"Just Clarke and I'm happy to help," she nodded to Lexa, "after all you put up with her infuriating presence for almost ten years by yourself. I commend anybody who has done that."

Beth laughed and nodded, "has Alexandria told you about the time she went to pick up her first sword?"

"Beth that need not be explained."

Clarke put up a hand to stop Lexa and smirked, "what happened?"

"She was four winters old and boasted she was ready for the sword, not caring about what others thought. She went to pick it up and once it was off the ground, both she and the sword fell into the mud due to it's weight."

The blond former leader laughed and looked at Lexa, "I bet you were adorable, glaring at everyone and ordering their deaths."

"As I was not yet _Heda_ , I could do nothing about their laughter." Lexa stated as she took a drink of her wine. "If you attempt to gain any more stories from my sister you will find your furs cold tonight."

Clarke chuckled and looked over at Beth, "please tell me another."

"Clarke I have warned you."

"Ignore her, what about right after she became _Heda_?"

* * *

A/N: Well a nice ending to horrible beginning.

Next: The healers arrive and Lexa questions them both, revealing more than previously thought.

Please read and review...


	14. A Personal War

Hatred into Love

Spoilers: All Season 1 and Season 2 of the 100; Spoilers from San Diego Comic Con The 100 Panel

Disclaimer: I own nothing!

* * *

Clarke stood in the courtyard learning from the orphans how to fire an arrow from a bow when the sound of fast hoof beats broke her attention. She watched the kids run to the nearby wall and start clambering up to look over it. The wall separated the main entrance yard of that of the training yard. Placing her bow and arrow aside, she made her way over and pushed herself up to watch with the kids as two envoys she knew Lexa sent arrived back. They jumped from their horses as the two men who rode beside them slowly stepped off.

One of the older girls pulled on Clarke's cloak. " _Wanheda_ , why are the men in chains?"

Narrowing her eyes she saw that they were slow getting off their horses because they were actually bound by the wrists in metal cuffs. "I don't know."

"They angered _Heda_ , you fool!" One of the older boys pulled the girl's braid. "She would not have her envoys chain people unless they were in danger of being tied to a tree."

"Yes but what for?" The girl looked to Clarke. "You must know _Wanheda_ , why does _Heda_ want their blood?"

Clarke shook her head, "I don't know but I'm going to find out. All of you get back to training before you get in trouble." She moved over the stone and whistled, one of the guards nearby moved over to her. "Help me down."

He held out his hands to help her down without questioning. Once she was down, she made her way to the doors and it was pushed open for her without a single word being said. It was something Clarke had come to learn since her arrival in Polis, the guards surrounding the palace followed her every command. She saw the envoys and their prisoners enter the main room where Lexa met with audiences. She made her way up the steps and paused at seeing the two men on their knees while the envoys made their way past her, their task apparently over.

* * *

She watched Lexa stand from her antler throne and walk over to the men, her regalia much more different then that during war. The red sash remained but her armor was replaced by a green dress, the sash held at her neck by a clasp. The sword belt she held around her waist was thinner, fit for a dress then the armor of war. Clarke watched her withdraw the sword and stop feet from the men.

Trigedasleng was used but Clarke knew what it was about, the anger in Lexa's even tone wouldn't be heard except by one that had endured her lectures. She stood watching, partially transfixed and Lexa used her sword to raise each man's chin. Her questions directed at each one individually but neither replied. Clarke knew their fate when she heard Lexa speak soft but powerfully. " _Jus drein jus draun_."

The words broke Clarke's ground and she started walking towards the two men as Lexa moved back to her throne. She clearly was about to call the guards to take the men to their deaths. She saw Lexa open her mouth to call them but she shut it, a slight smirk on her face when Clarke made her way between both men and towards Lexa.

"I was the one poisoned, I will judge them not you!" She practically spat at her and Lexa smirked, motioning to the men as if saying they were hers to deal with.

Clarke turned to the men and saw their eyes on her, "Healers of Virg may I introduce to you _Wanheda Klark kom Skaikru_ , the one whose spirit your poison nearly released. The gods have spoken and they have said her life is equal to mine." Lexa's gaze flickered to Clarke, "if not more precious having been chosen by not one but two gods."

The men both gulped as Clarke stood over them. "I'm not like _Heda_ , I do not threaten with the tree or weapons." She knelt down till she was eyelevel with them, "I give promises. I give my word that the one who gave the warrior the poison will only endure the sickness I endured before the antidote is given." Her voice softened as she looked at them both, "Jula maybe my companion but I am Aven's messenger and he lies with peace and life. So tell me which supplied the poison?"

One of the men lowered his head and cried softly. "I gave him the poison, he threatened my family if I did not." He looked back up at her and his tears were running down is face. "My child just breathed her first breath as the sun rose that day, I could not let him take her spirit."

Nodding the blond gave a soft smile, "you'll be taken the prison and fed a cup of water with the poison. I shall personally come with the antidote two hours after and as soon as you are well you will be allowed to return home to your daughter. However, the next time you provide darkseed to another it will not be my punishment you endure so be warned."

Standing Clarke signaled to the guard and he freed the other man while taking the one who poisoned her down the hall where she knew the empty prison lay. The room was as empty as it had been before their arrival but instead of turning she stood looking at the entrance of the room. Feeling the brush of air behind her, she knew Lexa had stood and was about to give her a lecture on her display and punishment.

"Word will spread of your mercy, of the mighty _Wanheda_ who leads with her heart and not her head." Lexa spoke softly as Clarke turned to look at her. "You will give the people your heart Clarke, the one thing I cannot allow myself to give them."

Clarke nodded, "I'm sure you're going to tell me that I'm being weak."

"Only Nia will see it as such," Lexa moved closer to her and surveyed the blue eyes staring at her with question. "The people are led by one who can only provide safety, justice and peace through war. You will lead them with your heart and mercy, that alone will gain you an army willing to fight for you if the need arises. Perhaps Anya was wrong that mercy is a weakness _Heda_ cannot bestow."

A smile crossed the blond's face before she leaned in to kiss Lexa's cheek, "thanks." She was gone before Lexa could respond and missed the smile cross the brunette's cheek.

* * *

The next day Clarke entered the prison room and found the man who provided her poison sleeping without sweating. She'd been to see him twice during the night to administer the second and third doses of the antidote. He woke when the door closed behind her and she bent down with fresh water and a roll of bread.

"You are not like _Heda_." He spoke softly as he accepted both carefully from her. "You give us mercy."

Clarke nodded, "death is my companion but I prefer to preserve life. You feared for your child and I can't harm you for that. Besides you didn't know what he planned to use it for and that makes you innocent for all but the poison."

"I once was a warrior, fought wars with the clans until my _houmon_ was killed in battle. I was left with a child to keep safe so I put away my weapons and began to heal those in need. When I took another as mine I thought to return to battle but wars had already ceased. My new child lives in peace, she can play in the forest without fear of reapers or the mountain. I have you to thank for such things _Wanheda_."

"Don't sell darkseed again and you'll see her grow to unite with another." Clarke rose and moved to the door. "You'll be released when the sun rises tomorrow."

The man sat up slowly, " _Wanheda_ you must know something." She turned back to him and he met her eyes. "Azgeda warriors, they spoke of their queen's advances. She is planning war, I heard them say that as _Heda_ mourns the death of her lover they will take the villages on the border one by one." He swallowed hard, "you are her, the lover they spoke of. They do not know you live and soon they will attack the villages." Clarke didn't even correct him, she threw open the door to the cell and ran. She ran for the war room where she knew Lexa was speaking with generals about protecting the trade routes.

* * *

Running hard through corridors, she ignored those that stared or questioned her. She reached the doors and pushed through them not caring about order or protocol. The heavy doors being thrown open made all in the room look at her, Lexa narrowing her eyes.

" _Azkru Kwin!_ " She huffed as she spoke, "she plans to attack the border villages. My death was to be the distraction for _Heda_ while she attacks."

Lexa made her way over to her and looked into her eyes. "Who gave you this information?"

"The prisoner, he overheard the _Azgeda_ warriors in the village." She stared into Lexa's eyes as she spoke. "He wouldn't lie after I gave him his life." Her voice lowered to a whisper, "the poison was meant for your lover."

She nodded before turning back to her generals, "rally the army, there is no time to call for the other clans. We defend our villages, send riders immediately to alert them to the attack." She looked at the map and used her knife to stab the Ice Nation. "No longer will she defy me, I will take her head."

Clarke made her way over, " _Skaikru_ can help, we have weapons that can assist. We'll fight if it means our home is threatened and she is threatening it." She looked at the generals, "I'll ride to Camp Jaha and bring back men and weapons, we'll meet you at the border."

"No you will stay in Polis!" Lexa turned sharply, "under protection and where you can assist in matters of war beyond the battlefield."

"I am going to war, she is threatening my people!" Clarke started towards her. "I am _Wanheda_ …"

Lexa stared at Clarke as she practically roared. "You are my queen! She has already harmed you once, never again!"

Clarke watched her generals look between them, there was nothing she could say that wouldn't be deadly at that moment. Lexa had made a declaration and fighting against it would do more damage than sneaking away in the night. Instead she stared into green eyes as the brunette breathed slightly more heavily. "That maybe so but your furs will be cold until the moment you ride to war." With that she left the room, ignoring the painful tug the statement she'd given felt. She had to go to the camp, she had to collect men and guns in order to fight.

* * *

She didn't know how she ended up at the temple but she knelt before the altar with her eyes staring at the symbol of Forsa. The tree drew her attention as she sat there looking up the shadowed symbols of the gods. She didn't believe in the gods, nothing in her life had given her something to believe there was some kind of higher power that guided them. Life seemed so cruel, like no god would put them in existence just to see them suffer.

" _Wanheda_ …" She heard Maxim's voice and saw him as he walked to the altar, adding hot coals to the brazier that displayed the symbols of the gods. "You come with burdens."

Clarke nodded, "something beyond my control has happened and _Heda_ is preventing me from helping."

Maxim knelt beside her and looked up at the symbols of the gods. "Which calls to you?"

"All of them, I can't explain it but they all call to me. Forsa calls the most but they all call."

"What does your heart tell you when you look upon them?"

Clarke sighed and looked up at them, "I look at Jula and I fear _Heda_ won't return from war this time. I look at Forsa and I feel power, like I could win against _Azgeda_ if I do what I believe is right. I just want all our people to live."

The priest was silent before he spoke, "you have sight like the priests. The gods do not give that to many outside the temple so you must listen to what is said. What does your heart say when you think of it all?"

"If I go against Heda and do what I believe is right I can win the war but if I do as she asks, she'll release her spirit on the battlefield." She looked at Maxim, "if what you say is true, why would Forsa guide me and not Aven?"

Maxim smiled and placed a hand on her arm. " _Heda_ is Forsa's chosen, but you are Aven's messenger and like Aven you wish to protect your bonded. Go _Wanheda_ , do what you believe is right but wait till _Heda_ leaves so she does not suspect."

"Thank you Maxim."

"The gods guide you _Wanheda_ , I merely help those who they protect." He smiled and stood, leaving her to her thoughts.

* * *

Clarke watched from her window the next morning as Lexa rode off with her army. She'd been so angry at the brunette she'd ignored her knocks and her requests, determined not to see her. She watched as at the gate Lexa paused her horse and looked back towards her window but she quickly pulled her horse back into a gallop. Part of her regretted not saying goodbye but Lexa made her choice in the war room. That was the last the brunette would see of her before she went off to war.

She bided her day preparing a pack and dressing in clothes other than her usual dresses. Choosing the brown fur-lined cloak from her chest, she pulled it on as the sun set on the horizon and headed out of the palace. She turned back to see Ryder wasn't with her, remembering that he'd been called to war with Lexa. Only the palace guards remained and she was sure they saw her but ignored her as she usually headed to stables around sunset to feed Steltrona apples. They'd only be concerned once she didn't come back, the guards at the gate were the bigger concern.

Retrieving her horse was easy, the time in Polis made it possible for the horse to be trained only to her. Mounting the animal, she galloped through the streets of Polis, past the temple and to the gates. No one stopped her and only once at the gates did the guards look down at her. She stared up at them, determination on her face. "Open the gates by order of _Wanheda_!" They didn't move, "open them or I shall put all of you on a tree to be dead by morning!" All moved quickly and opened the gates, Clarke pushed Steltrona into a gallop and into the direction of Camp Jaha.

She rode through the night and the next day, pausing only for small breaks to allow Steltrona to rest and to eat. Clarke knew she had to ride as far as possible to reach Camp Jaha in time, especially since she had to avoid Tondc. It was high noon when she reached the camp, allowing the horse to slow down. The guards at the gates yelled and the gates were opened immediately despite not knowing it was her though.

* * *

Getting off her horse once inside the gate, she pushed back her hood and saw her mother running towards her. She accepted the hug but immediately turned to Bellamy, seeing Echo beside him. She gave the girl a nod and the girl gave one in return as did Lincoln and Octavia.

"Clarke, what's happening?" Bellamy looked at her with concern.

"Why would anything be wrong?" Abby asked and looked between them, "you're here for a visit."

Clarke shook her head, "actually I'm not. We're at war, the Ice Nation's queen poisoned me and while I'm okay, she decided to use it as a distraction to take the border villages." She looked at her mother, "Lexa has gone to war but the Ice warriors, without the clans they'll destroy the army she has. I need volunteers and firepower, anything Raven can cook up last minute."

"She used darkseed didn't she?" It came from the girl beside Bellamy and Clarke narrowed her eyes. "She used it on me." The girl moved forward and nodded to Clarke as she stood feet from her. " _Ai laik Eko kom Azkru, ai ki em sis_."

"Clarke we just finished a war." Abby tried to be the voice of reason.

The blond turned to her mother, "Mount Weather would be a paper cut compared to the Ice Nation. They show no mercy, they torture and kill while enjoying it. Mount Weather had a reason, the Ice Nation does not."

Echo nodded as Bellamy clutched her hand. "My people," she looked at Bellamy, "my former people took joy in prolonging the suffering of others. Our warriors are trained from birth, no options afforded to them other than to fight for my sister and she has no heart. She has no fear and will do whatever she wishes in order to gain what she wants. I should know, all I did was touch her favorite blade and she poisoned me for it. She waited until I was near death and gave me the cure. After I had recovered she sent me to retrieve a bounty in these lands, knowing I would be captured by the mountain."

"We'll need a day to prepare." Bellamy stated, "for Raven to come up with grenades."

Clarke nodded, "a day but no more."

* * *

A/N: Well that was a huge surprise but was anyone really surprised?

Next: Battle ensues on the border and Clarke arrives to find more than she wanted.

Please read and review...


	15. The Battles of Love and Blood

Hatred into Love

Spoilers: All Season 1 and Season 2 of the 100; Spoilers from San Diego Comic Con The 100 Panel

Disclaimer: I own nothing!

* * *

Clarke was preparing her horse as everyone going geared up the thirty horses that had been delivered to them shortly after she'd taken residence in Polis. She'd had Octavia and Lincoln braid her hair in a design that signified her status as Lexa's queen as well as _Wanheda_ , a tribute she hoped the brunette appreciated when she saw her next. More so Lincoln applied warpaint to her eyes, a mixture of blue and black so it showed her status as both of _Skaikru_ when being partially _Trigeda_.

The sounds of shouts made her look towards the gate and saw riders approaching the gate. Again the gates opened so it meant they were _Trigeda_. Clarke immediately made her way over, her mother and Bellamy behind her. One of the warriors was a guard from the palace and had clearly ridden quickly to get to the camp as well. He dismounted and looked at Clarke, " _ai kwin_ , you must return to the palace before _Heda_ receives word of your departure. If you do not, all the warriors in Polis will meet death for failing to protect you."

"I am taking _Skaikru_ to assist _Heda_ , the gods have spoken to me and if I don't assist then _Heda_ will not see the end of the battle. Her spirit will be released and I won't let that happen, it isn't her time to meet the gods yet."

He bowed his head, "then we will ride with you."

"We ride at once for the border, you'll stay behind _Skaikru_." She nodded to his horse, "return to your horse and wait for us to depart."

" _Sha ai kwin_." He bowed his head and turned to return to his horse.

* * *

As she turned back to finish preparing Steltrona, both her mother and Bellamy looked at her confused. Her former co-leader was the first to ask the obvious question. "Did he just call you his queen? I'm not fluent but I know enough thanks to the fact my girlfriend is grounder as is my brother-in-law." He shook his head, "and what was that about the gods speaking to you?"

Clarke fixed the strap of her bag as it sat against Steltrona's saddle. "First, what they call me doesn't concern you." She turned to look at him, "all that matters is they follow my orders and are our allies. Second, they believe heavily in their gods and they believe they chose me to lead, I said what needs to be said to make them believe helping Lexa is the best. Their pride and stubbornness gets in the way of actual thought at times."

"I take offense to that!" Octavia stated as she passed her while leading her horse.

"Octavia you know I didn't mean you in that."

The girl looked back with a smile, "I know _ai kwin_ …" she smirked as she mounted the animal.

"Don't ever call me that again."

Octavia chuckled, "well it is better than princess, don't you think?"

Clarke mounted Steltrona and looked around, "you better mount up Bellamy, it looks like Echo wants to leave before me."

"Family spats tend to make anyone eager to go into battle." Bellamy chuckled and headed to his horse. "Isn't that right sis?" Octavia flicked him her middle finger and he laughed as he turned his horse so he could move over to Echo. "So meeting your sister, this should be interesting."

Echo gave him a solid look, "if she doesn't gut you within the first five minutes of meeting you I will be impressed."

"And you thought all in-laws were great." Octavia smirked at her brother, "my _houmon_ is about as lucky in that department as you'll get."

"Right, well off to war." He looked over at Clarke, "do you have a kill count in mind?"

Clarke looked back at him, "the entire _Azkru_ army but save the queen, she's mine." Without further ado she pushed Steltrona forward and the horse started to gallop out of the gate. Octavia and Lincoln quickly followed with Echo behind them, Bellamy getting his horse to follow Echo's. The rest of their guard followed, volunteers with weapons training.

* * *

Echo led them to the border, riding slightly behind Clarke with verbal directions being given every so often. Things started to look familiar to Clarke as they neared the village Osa and Nora lived in but it also spelled trouble as ice warriors and _Trikru_ lay on the ground dead. Clarke ordered the palace guards to stay behind and build a pyre for them, something Bellamy narrowed his eyes at.

Night and day passed before they arrived at the village and Clarke heard the battle before she saw it. Warriors fighting, fires burning and screams of innocents as a slaughter went on. She turned to look at Bellamy, seeing his wide eyes as if unused to the wars raged by Grounders. He'd been in Mount Weather for a majority of it, he was only partially exposed to the reality of war on the ground.

"We leave the horses here. Take the weapons," she turned her attention to Lincoln. "Plant one of Raven's bombs east of the village by the river, there's a bridge that they use."

Lincoln nodded and nudged his horse to the east, Octavia following him into the forest. Clarke got off her horse and grabbed her sword, at least until Echo took it from her. "Are you proficient with a sword?"

"I know enough to survive."

"Then I shall guard you, _Azgeda_ are not _Trigeda_."

Clarke took the rifle that Bellamy handed her, "what do you want us to do?"

"Surround the village as best as possible, shoot any ice warrior you can without harming _Trigeda_."

He nodded and leaned in to kiss Echo goodbye, "come back to me."

"I shall as long as my spirit remains in this body." She nodded to him as he let go of her hand, leading the men into the woods that surrounded the village. "Come _ai kwin_ , you came to give _Heda_ assistance and we shall."

* * *

Making their way through the village was like a battlefield but Clarke fired her weapon while Echo took out others with the sword. She made it to the center of the village and Clarke paused when she saw Jok on the ground, his wife laying over him with her swollen belly bloody from no doubt a sword being pushed through it. Clarke swallowed and turned back around to see Echo cutting a man down, his eyes going wide at her.

" _Prisa_ …"

"No, _Skaikru_!" Echo stated clearly as she removed her sword from him. She turned to see Clarke looking at her. "I was their princess once but my heart chose Bellamy and the Sky People."

Clarke put a hand to her shoulder, "for that I'm glad, when we get through this you are going to show me how to do what you just did."

"I will if _Heda_ does not take my head for allowing you to come into battle."

Continuing through Clarke paused when she saw Lexa fighting a man twice as big as her, what caught her eye most was the blood-dripping wound at Lexa's side as well as the fact she held one arm to her. Like always, she'd dislocated her shoulder again and was stupid enough to be fighting a man twice her size with just her shoulder. Clarke aimed her rifle but sighed and slung it over her back, pulling her knife from her boot. With as much strength as she could she threw it at the warrior, surprised when it hit him in the neck.

Lexa's gaze surveyed the area and landed on Clarke, her eyes going wide as Clarke heard Echo's grunt along with the familiar sing of the former ice warrior's sword. Turning the blond found Echo cutting the man's arm off, shoving her sword into his heart. "Perhaps you should not stand as an open target _ai kwin_."

"I'm guessing Bellamy pisses you off during hunts, standing around as he does." She removed her rifle as she saw one of the men heading for Echo, shooting over her head.

"There is a reason he does not hunt." Echo turned to see the warrior fall to the ground feet from her. "Your aim is impressive as it is with a knife."

"Thanks, I think." Clarke turned back to see Lexa engaged with another man, this time just about her size and this time she shoved her sword into him. "Excuse me while I go help the most stubborn woman the gods put on this planet."

Echo nodded, "I will be destroying the _Azgeda_ as you wished."

* * *

Clarke raised her rifle and made her way over to Lexa, shooting several _Azkru_ warriors. Finally she watched Lexa turn, standing tall despite her injuries. "I shall put every guard ordered to watch you to death for the fact you are here."

"Don't blame them, I told them I'd kill them if they didn't let me go." Clarke turned and fired on two more warriors heading straight for them. "You shouldn't have ordered them to obey me."

Lexa turned her back to Clarke and shoved her sword into an already injured warrior trying to make a kill. "Something I will remedy with my new guard."

"The real reason I'm here?" Clarke turned to see Lexa looking at her, "I saw you die in battle but when Forsa gave me a sign I knew if I helped that you'd survive."

"You don't believe in the gods."

Clarke smiled softly, "I didn't until I saw a raven flying over me the entire ride here. I saw the trees shelter me from the cold wind and during the night the stars seems to fly across the sky without stopping. Sometimes you can't believe in something until it stares you right in the face."

A smile threatened to spill across the woman's face until it fell. "Nia…"

* * *

Clarke turned to see all the _Azgeda_ standing down as Nia made her way across the broken village. Out of the corner of her eye, Clarke saw Echo duck between tents to stay out of view but able to view the entire scene. Without further thought, Clarke raised her rifle and pointed it at the queen. "Just say the word and I'll put a bullet right through her head."

Nia stopped a few feet from Lexa and Clarke, "so we meet again _Wanheda_ , assisting _Heda_ in battle like a good little warrior." She tilted her head, "but then you are not just her warrior. Your braids dear, in battle you should never display such a status."

"My braid choice is none of your concern, thanks for the advice though. I'll file it under the pile of useless information I have already gained from Lexa and everyone else who offers it to me."

Lexa felt the urge to roll her eyes, "my lessons are never useless."

"Lessons no but advice, yes!" Clarke raised her head off the rifle to look at Lexa at the corner of her eyes. "Like the advice you gave me of multiple ways to skin a deer, I doubt I'll be using that anytime soon."

"It was information you need to survive in the woods or did your time on the Ark prepare you for such things?"

"Gods help me." Clarke hissed as lowered her head to see through the scope of the rifle a second time.

" _Ai kwin!_ " A warrior's voice was followed by a grunt and then someone on their knees beside the three. Clarke immediately saw it was Echo, her blade to her throat. " _Prisa_ …"

Nia smiled, "how nice of you to bring my sister back to me Alexandria. I did wonder about her when I heard she escaped the mountain."

* * *

Before anything more could be said a shot rang out and the warrior holding the blade dropped, Clarke looked in the direction to her left to see Bellamy a few feet away with his rifle raised and both Octavia and Lincoln with their weapons drawn. "Step away from her now or so help me, I will put a hole through your head."

Echo stood up and collected the sword, "Bell, I am fine."

"You say that now but five seconds ago he had a sword to your throat."

"I let him find me," Echo made her way over to him, stepping around her sister as she went. "If I wanted him dead, he would have been dead. You Sky People think a blade means we are helpless."

Bellamy dropped his rifle to his side, "you know where I come from, we say thank you for acts like that."

"It was foolish, you are foolish!" Echo berated him and hit him upside the head. "I should have left you to die in those cages."

"I saved you, not the other way around."

Octavia sighed, "here we go again." She looked over at Clarke, "they fight more than the _Azgeda_ and _Trigeda_. You three could probably hash out your war before they're finished so I'd continue."

"I strictly remember opening the cage to save your life."

Echo turned to point at him, "I should have let that guard attack you."

"Then you'd be dead wouldn't you!" Bellamy looked at her, "we all would be."

"At least a _branwada_ like you would not be walking through the forest, loud enough for all the animals to hear!"

* * *

Clarke looked at Nia, "meet your sister's _houmon_ , my general."

The ice queen narrowed her eyes, "if he is an example of your clan then you are to be pitied Klark kom Skaikru. Such foolishness to think you can beat me, the mountain men most likely killed themselves to escape you."

"Did she just imply that I didn't commit genocide?" Clarke asked Lexa and the warrior beside her gave a slight smirk. "Because I know I did, I know I killed three hundred innocent lives and every day I live with it!" Clarke's voice got louder as she lowered the weapon and advanced on Nia. "You may massacre villages and enjoy killing but I assure you that I do not." Nia backed up a distance as Clarke moved against her. "I killed three hundred warriors with fire, I let two hundred and fifty people die just to keep the mountain from knowing about my spy and I destroyed that ENTIRE POPULATION TO SAVE MY PEOPLE!" Clarke yelled as she advanced on Nia, the queen clearly shocked at Clarke's advance and tone. "So DO NOT EVER say that I didn't do what I did because I swear I will prove to you how lethal I can be!"

Lexa had advanced enough to grab Clarke's arm, "enough Clarke, all are aware of your actions now."

Clarke huffed slightly before raising her rifle at Nia once again. "You were saying?"

Nia swallowed and looked to Lexa, "you chose weak last time and now you chose one who has a lost mind. Perhaps it is not I you should not fear Alexandria, her mind is broken and like a sick animal she will turn on you eventually."

"Can I kill her so we can go home?" Clarke asked Lexa softly, "your wounds are bothering me."

The ice queen laughed, "you cannot stand the sight of blood, you have no business on a battlefield child."

"I'm a healer," Clarke glared at the woman. "The fact _Heda_ could bleed to death by the time we finish here is what worries me."

* * *

Before anyone could reply an explosion went off and they saw the cloud in the distance. Nia turned suddenly and looked at it, "you used mountain technology."

"No, that would be my mechanic." Clarke stated and looked at the woman as she turned around furious. "Some horse shit packed with gas and a closed container, I don't know the specifics but that was the result. The bridge that separates _Azgeda_ and _Trigeda_ is gone, a deep river is the only crossing left."

Lexa moved forward slightly, "you are trespassing on my land and you cannot return to your own. You will suffer for your crimes Nia, you and your men."

"You allowed them to do this, it is an act of war!" Nia yelled and Lexa narrowed her eyes.

"You started this war and while I could have eventually forgotten this village, you did something far worse. Harming my queen is the only act of war unforgivable to me…"

"She massacred this village, innocent children and women." Clarke piped up and Lexa seemed to give a soft nod.

"Such acts only gain you death." Lexa put out her sword but the world spun around her instantly, her vision blurring as she felt the ground become uneven.

Clarke watched Lexa fall and before Nia could get the idea to strike she fired the weapon into Nia's leg, twice so she could not get up from where she lay in the dirty. Grabbing Lexa's sword, she walked over to her as Bellamy and the others in the trees started firing their rifles at the remaining _Azgeda_ warriors. Nia looked up at her with fear, clearly aware of what Clarke planned to do.

"I was wrong to doubt you Sky girl, give me mercy."

Clarke stared down at her, "did you give Costia mercy before you took her life? Did you think of mercy when you sent her to Lexa piece by piece?" She raised the sword and looked down at the woman before her. "Did you think of mercy when you sent your sister to die? When you ordered my death? Was mercy on your mind when you massacred this village?"

* * *

Before the woman could reply Clarke pushed the sword through her heart then pulled out. After doing so she moved to Lexa, finding Lincoln already seeing to the wounds. He gave her a sharp look, "she needs the healers of Polis."

"Get her inside one of the tents, I'll have to do because she won't last the ride."

Once inside the tent, Clarke removed Lexa's armor with expert hands and examined the wound at her side. The woman's shoulder could wait to be pushed back into place until her side was dealt with. Gently she cleaned the wound with a cloth Lincoln handed her and the water that assisted in washing away tried blood. Echo and Octavia entered the tent, Bellamy too but he turned his head as Lexa lay bare from the waist up.

"How is she Clarke?"

"The wound isn't deep but knowing her stubbornness she probably did more damage fighting with it then not." Clarke looked up at them, "we need to get her to Camp Jaha immediately, I can sew her up but that will only last so long."

Echo looked into blue eyes, "there is no one left in the village, all are dead. If we ride through the night and day without stopping we can make it home."

"Okay, I'll do what I can but we need to leave immediately after." She looked to the three Grounders with her. "If we want to save Lexa we don't have time to release the spirits of those here."

"We'll stay and do it." Octavia volunteered and Lincoln nodded. "What about _Azkru_ warriors and the queen?"

Clarke bit her lip, "burn them, they had no dignity in life but we give it to them in death. Hopefully the gods will be merciful on them in the next life."

"Or give them a worse fate." Echo stated without care. "Bellamy and I will prepare the horses." She turned to leave the tent, dragging Bellamy with her.

* * *

Clarke completed what she could in regards to Lexa and gently reapplied her armor, allowing Lincoln to lift the mighty woman despite her status being that of a rag doll. It was only once Clarke had mounted her horse did Lincoln gently place Lexa in her arms, she covered Lexa with her cloak as much as possible and turned to Lincoln and Octavia as Bellamy spoke to them.

"Half the guards are remaining to help, the other half are going to escort us back. Just return home when it's finished, we'll be waiting for you."

Octavia nodded before looking at Echo. "Keep him safe."

"With my life."

Clarke allowed herself to hold onto Lexa gently yet tightly as she put Steltrona into a gallop. As if sensing the urgently, the horse seemed to go faster than usual. She looked down at Lexa's pale face, half hidden under the warpaint and she only hoped she made it in time. Looking up at the sky she spoke, despite those beside her hearing.

"Forsa keep her spirit where it is, Sora guide us safely, Aven protect us." Like before the caw of a bird was heard and she spotted the raven flying above them, it cawed several times and Clarke smiled.

Bellamy looked up, "is that a bird?"

"No, it's Sora." Clarke looked at him, "she'll guide us safely to Camp Jaha."

He shook his head, "Sora, you named a bird?"

Echo smiled as she looked at her _houmon_ , "Sora is the goddess of the sky, she guides all life who have need. She is sending her envoy to Clarke as she did before, nothing shall harm us until we arrive safely home." She looked over at Clarke, "she is _Wanheda_ , chosen by the gods so they protect her."

* * *

A/N: Who enjoyed that little spat between Echo and Bellamy as well as the badass fighting by Lexa and Clarke?

Next: Lexa recovers at Camp Jaha and Clarke comes clean to her mother and friends about her new faith in the gods and relationship with Lexa.

Please read and review...


	16. The Truth Shall Set You Free

Hatred into Love

Spoilers: All Season 1 and Season 2 of the 100; Spoilers from San Diego Comic Con The 100 Panel

Disclaimer: I own nothing!

* * *

Clarke watched from the doorway of the Infirmary as Lincoln, Octavia and the guards that had remained behind were once again welcomed back to camp. Lexa's recovery had been marginally better than usual according to Drov, one of the palace guards that had arrived back with them. Apparently most of the time the brunette was out of bed before the healer allowed her to be, her wounds taking far longer to heal then on normal warriors. He had thanked Clarke for her influence on Lexa, for their leader would heal quicker under her care.

"They have returned." The voice made Clarke roll her eyes and she turned to find Lexa only a foot away, dressed in only a tank top and leggings that Clarke had found in the clothing stores. She watched Lexa's eyes narrow as Octavia and Lincoln made their way towards the small camp that the Grounders had set up. "She went into battle with the child under her heart."

"Lincoln said it wasn't common but it wasn't forbidden. Besides, persuading Octavia otherwise is impossible." Clarke gently turned Lexa around and guided her back over to the small room that was Lexa's during her stay. The woman seemed to escape it at every chance and her consequence for each attempt didn't persuade her. "The baby is slightly smaller than normal according to my mother, healthy but growing at a slower pace. She won't show her pregnancy more than she is till she gets closer to her due date."

Lexa sat on the bed as Clarke gently pushed her down. "Is the child impure?"

"My mother says the baby is healthy, just small." Clarke motioned with her hands so Lexa lifted her legs on the bed and laid back. "Right now you need to forget being _Heda_ and focus on being Lexa." She pulled the blanket over Lexa's body and leaned down to look at her, "even if that is difficult for you."

"I am _Heda_ even if for the moment I am your patient."

Clarke stared into green eyes, "you're now up to six days of sleeping alone, want to go for a week?" She smiled as she pulled back and reattached Lexa's IV, thankful the woman had watched her disconnect it enough to know how to do it without damaging the tubing or her own arm. "I told you, every attempt you make is a night with cold furs."

"When we arrive back to Polis I am appointing you my personal healer." Lexa spoke as she watched Clarke sit down beside her, lifting her shirt to view the bandage and stitches on her side.

"Good," Clarke smiled at her. "That way if you are injured you can't order someone to let you get out of bed. If I tell you that you are on bed rest, it means you'll be staying in bed until I let you out."

Lexa gave a soft smirk, "I enjoy you in my bed Clarke, it would not be forcing me."

"Bed rest means you in bed by yourself while you are healing." The blond shook her head, "I will be in my bed so I don't get sick from whatever you have."

* * *

A cough was heard and they both turned to see Bellamy and Echo, "maybe we should come back." With that they both left and Clarke slapped Lexa against her good arm.

"Now I have to explain why I would be in your bed."

"It is not their concern why you share my bed." Lexa rubbed her arm where Clarke had slapped her as the area was slightly red.

"That maybe so but unlike those born on the ground, Sky People spread gossip like it's food. Bellamy will say something to someone and in turn they will tell someone else. Before nightfall everyone will know that I grace the Commander's bed." She pulled Lexa's shirt down, "I told them you couldn't be with anyone because of your vows."

"At that time it was truth but now the gods speak differently." Lexa reached up and turned Clarke's face till their eyes met. "You are mine Clarke, I fight for what is mine and as I said before, you may have all the time you require to come to your emotions regarding me."

Clarke nodded, "I am your queen and if you'll let me, I'd like to be your _houmon_."

Lexa nearly grinned and pulled Clarke towards her, kissing her despite the fact they were in a public area. She only pulled back after realizing where they were and stared into Clarke's eyes as she did. "We will have a union ceremony that will be celebrated for weeks."

"I'd like to wait on that." Clarke took Lexa's hand, "explore what this is between us before we unite."

"If that is your wish then it shall be so." Lexa brought Clarke's hand to her lips and kissed it. "However I do not wish you far from my furs."

Laughter escaped the blond as she stood beside the bed. "You know the consequences for getting out of bed. It means that you sleep alone for six nights when we get home, more if you continue getting out of bed."

"Clarke I would not remove myself from bed if you were with me." Lexa attempted her best innocent eyes and Clarke snorted.

"Stop trying to get away with what you've done." Clarke leaned down to kiss her gently, pulling back before the woman could attempt to deepen it. "I know you Lexa so I do what I must to get you to listen."

* * *

The bonfire was raging outside in the small area the Grounders had set up. They were joined by some of the delinquents, Octavia, Lincoln, Bellamy and Echo along with Kane and Abby. Clarke watched as one of the men attempted to show Abby a stitching technique that could hold a wound closed for days without tearing. It was also used on clothes, which he was mending by the fire as his shirt tore a hole that was too massive to let go.

"So I thread the string through twice?"

He chuckled, "three times Abby of the Sky People, three times. Here, attempt it yourself." He handed her a spare piece of cloth and a needle with extra twine.

"So Clarke," Bellamy looked over at her with his moonshine held in his hand. "You gonna tell us how you ended up in the Commander's bed?"

The blond narrowed her eyes, "exhaustion." She dared him to continue, the Grounders were smart and went about fixing their clothing or sharpening their weapons. They didn't say anything or attempt to look at her when she spoke, they knew the subject of who graced their leader's furs was not a topic of discussion.

"Sounds like sex to me." Miller was the one to make the comment. "The real question we all have is how is she in bed? Fun or just as silent and stoic like normal."

" _Heda_ is reported to be a gentle lover." Drov spoke softly and all looked at him, "warriors do speak of their lovers when one comes back from another's furs. We are not scared of our own bodies like you Sky People."

"Like I said, I'd do her." Raven spoke and Wick reached over to take her cup of moonshine. "Hey, give that back!"

"Obviously you've had enough to drink." He downed the alcohol before handing her back the cup.

Clarke narrowed her eyes at Drov, "speaking of _Heda_ can cost you your tongue, careful how you speak Drov."

" _Sha ai kwin_." He nodded to her and then met her eyes. "I only wished to reassure your people that _Heda_ does not harm you."

Octavia was the one to snort, "I'd be more concerned for someone that offends Clarke. Warriors whisper that she nearly took off the heads of two men when they sold poison to _Azgeda_ , not realizing that it was meant for you. They were innocent and yet she nearly took off their heads."

"Both men are still alive, I handled it." Clarke took a sip of her moonshine. She looked around her to see her friends and her mother and Kane. "I'm engaged, I should probably tell you before everyone else finds out."

* * *

Several of those at the bonfire spit out their drinks as they heard what was said. Clarke watched her mother let off a string of profanity as she accidentally stuck herself with the needle upon hearing those words leave her daughter's mouth. Abby looked up at her, "engaged?"

"Lexa asked me to marry her and I agreed on the condition we have a long engagement. I don't want to rush into marriage, I want to learn more about my fiancée before I marry her."

Raven shrugged, "makes sense, test the waters and learn whether she's the one for you."

"She is, the gods gave her to me and I know I'd fight a dozen Mount Weathers if it meant keeping her with me every day of forever."

Silence fell across everyone and it was Echo who finally broke the silence. "Forsa chose _Heda_ and Aven chose you, your union would symbolize the union between the gods. It would seem the gods meant for you both to be solely for each other."

"You speak of these gods as if you believe in them Clarke." Kane was the one to speak softly, gently as if the matter was delicate.

"I do." Clarke looked up to meet his eyes. "I can't explain it, but when I think of the gods I know they exist. I see Sora in the sky and know I'm safe on any journey I take. Jula is beside me each time I take a life, just or unjust. Aven guides my actions, giving me strength to deliver peace. Forsa shields me from the winds, giving us the animals we need to hunt." Clarke shrugged, "sometimes you can't believe in something until it stares you in the face or speaks to you in images."

"She was chosen by the gods." Echo smiled at them, "they would not choose one unless they knew her faith in them would not waver once she saw them around her. _Wanheda_ has found her faith and shall always retain it. Every _Heda_ to ever exist has been chosen by one god, Clarke was chosen by two gods at once. Never has that occurred and it is unlikely to be ever be again."

"None have been chosen by Aven either." Clarke pointed out and the brunette beside Bellamy nodded her head.

Abby finally looked up and met Clarke's eyes across the fire, "when would you two be getting married?"

"I'm surprised you haven't forbidden it yet!" Raven made the comment, "I mean you object to a lot when it comes to the Commander."

"I'll be speaking with the Commander later on, especially about this given the fact she is breaking religious vows to marry Clarke." Abby put the needle and thread aside and smiled at Clarke. "However, I've seen you two together and although you don't make sense as a couple by my prospective, I know love when I see it."

"A year or two." Clarke smiled at her mother. She then looked around the camp fire, "I want you all to visit Polis because it's worth the two day trip. We have running hot water and actual stone buildings. You'd be guests so you'd stay in the palace."

"Palace?" Monty raised his head from the small device he was tinkering with. "An actual palace?"

Clarke nodded, "I live there, I have three rooms that are mine but I only use one."

"Three rooms?" Raven snorted, "yeah you're a queen alright."

" _Kwin_ gave a room to her attendant so she would not have to return to the orphanage. It has never been done before, the orphans always live together despite the tasks they have during the day." Drov smiled at Clarke, "you are very generous _ai kwin_ and all speak of your kindness."

* * *

A shout of Clarke's name made the blond turn to see one of the medics walking over. He stopped as she stood up, "what's wrong David?"

"It's the Commander, she got out of bed to use the restroom despite us insisting that it not be a good idea. When she returned, we saw that she tore open her stitches and now refuses anyone help her other than you." He shook his head, "something about you being her personal healer."

She put down her moonshine, "I'll come knock some sense into her."

"Sorry Clarke but she threatened to cut off our hands if we touched her." David shook his head, "how do you deal with her?"

Clarke shrugged, "by striking where it hurts."

Abby and Kane were soon beside her, giving Clarke nonsense about how they were going to make sure there wasn't any damage to the Infirmary or the staff. Shouting could be heard when they entered the Infirmary, clearly Lexa was pissed off and angry.

"I said get your hands off me, I will take your hands for this!"

Pushing back the curtain, Clarke found two part-time medics backing away from the bed with their hands up while Lexa brandished a scalpel. She walked over and took the scalpel from Lexa's hand without hesitation. "Lay back and shut up, you don't threaten my people! They are _Skaikru_ and mine to disperse punishment if it warrants it." She threw the scalpel on the tray nearby and stared into Lexa's eyes. "Remember that our alliance isn't in writing yet so as of this moment, _Skaikru_ are not yours in any way."

"Clarke…"

"No, you don't get to 'Clarke' me. I saved your life and I won't allow you to be reckless enough to release your spirit by bleeding out." She ignored those in the room and pushed Lexa back, pulling her tank up to look at the wound. "So help me, if you release your spirit then I will hunt you down in the next life and kill you myself." She looked up at Lexa, "and you know I'll do it too so lay back and shut up!"

Lexa laid back and Clarke went about fixing the stitches and re-patching the wound. "Am I to assume I have lead myself to be alone for a week now?"

"Try two for this stunt!" Clarke looked up at her as she put the patch on Lexa's stitches. "Want to make it three or are you going to stay in bed?"

"I shall do as you command _Wanheda_." She lowered her head slightly and Clarke pulled her shirt down. "Apologies."

"Just don't do it again, the medics are here to help you." Clarke stood up and looked down at the brunette in the bed. "I'll be back to see you tonight, don't do this again or three weeks will be the least of your problems."

* * *

Walking out of the Infirmary, Clarke saw her mother and Kane looking at her with slightly questioning looks. "That was unexpected, I never expected her to just submit to you."

"She doesn't submit, she just knows that fighting me will only make it worse."

Kane chuckled, "yes, the famous Griffin anger that your mother has allowed me to witness. I agree with Lexa that she doesn't need to test it."

"Are you staying for another two weeks?" Abby asked hopefully, "she mentioned that she'd be alone."

Clarke waved her mother off, "it's personal, it's a specific punishment that I had to create to make sure Lexa didn't do stupid stuff like that." She motioned to the room they'd just left, "I'll be returning to Polis as soon as she's healed enough to ride her horse without breaking the stitches."

"We'll be sad to see you leave but we know you'll visit often." Kane smiled at her, "of course your invitation to Polis will likely have the kids wanting to visit soon."

"You're always welcome in Polis." Clarke looked back to the room they'd left, "I should go sit with her until she falls asleep."

* * *

A/N: It's short I know but the next one will be longer. I had two exams this week and I have a paper due next week so I'm a little slow right now.

Next: Clarke and Lexa find themselves discussing trade agreements but keep getting distracted by one thing or another.

Please read and review...


	17. Author Note

To all my followers and readers,

I apologize now but due to personal reasons I am no longer continuing this story. I will not be posting another chapter at any time in the future.

If you wish to adopt this story from me then PM me as I will have certain requirements of the adopter.

FD2008


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